Hmm, something doesn't add up.

Discussion in 'Pregnancy Chat' started by LauraMummyToBe, Jul 25, 2013.

  1. LauraMummyToBe

    LauraMummyToBe Well-Known Member

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    Again, this seems pretty pointless and I might just be being paranoid... But what do you think?

    Yesterday evening, I decided I'd go to the supermarket to get some fresh air and get some bits, I asked my OH if he wanted to walk down with me and he said no because he couldn't be bothered. Then after a few minutes of him silently sitting on Facebook typing away... He chirped up and said "I'll go for you if you want" but I said I'd go because I wasn't sure exactly what I wanted and I didn't want to write out a list and forget something. The thing is, he wouldn't let it drop for about 45 minutes and he was ADAMANT to go on his own for some reason but he said he was just "being nice".

    The reason I have concerns is because a couple of months ago, we were at the flat (we're currently at my parent's looking after their house whilst they're in Spain) and he'd gone to the shop... I was stood in the kitchen with the window open whilst washing dishes and all of a sudden I heard a woman shouting up at the window asking for my OH... This itself was a bit strange as I'd never seen her before, had no idea who she was. But then she tells me her name and I realised who she was as my OH has told me about her and how she's a bit of a man eater so to speak. He also told me that his friend has slept with this woman... AND she had tried it on with him numerous times. So he gets back and I told him that she'd be calling for him and he admitted to me that the day before whilst I was out she came round AGAIN and was asking if she could "come up and have a brew" he told me that he'd said no. But that's a little weird to me because this woman has a reputation... A very bad one.

    So that was that... Then there is today he has an appointment in Middleton at 4pm but he's set off at 10am? This is strange right? He's gone back to the flat... On his own... I have no idea why he'd wanna go back to the flat just to sit there and watch TV alone until his appointment?? He could have done that here, at my parent's house? The best is he sat in bed until 9:30am on Facebook then suddenly jumps up and decides he's setting off stupidly early?

    There are some trust issues in the relationship due to some stuff he'd said when we first got together (just under a year ago)... For example - "If I don't like someone I'll just go out and cheat on them" that put me on pins for a while but I got over it but since this woman and his strange behaviour I'm starting to worry he's up to something?

    Am I being stupid or do I have a good point? :/ xxx
     
  2. JoanneG79

    JoanneG79 Well-Known Member

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    You will know your OH better than me, but if you have suspicions then you should speak to him about them. He might have a good reason for acting like that, maybe someone was on Facebook telling him to get off his arse and help you out as you are pregnant with his child?

    Wish someone would say that to my OH!!
     
  3. LauraMummyToBe

    LauraMummyToBe Well-Known Member

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    I don't understand how he thinks running off to Middleton on his own when women with reputations come to the flat asking for brews when I'm not there is his way of helping. :/ Just going out of my mind. Now he won't talk to me about it which makes it all a little more strange to me. :/ xxx
     
  4. JoanneG79

    JoanneG79 Well-Known Member

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    That does make it a bit strange. How long should it take for him to get to Middleton? If he won't talk to you it certainly makes it more difficult for your suspicions to go away...
     
  5. Rebecca89

    Rebecca89 Well-Known Member

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    I would have to question him before I drove myself mad wondering!
    do you have access to the flat today too? xxx
     
  6. JoanneG79

    JoanneG79 Well-Known Member

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    I would probably end up following my OH to check up on him - all the while humming the Mission Impossible soundtrack in my head. Not that I am suggesting this is a good idea! Could someone you know nip round to check on him?

    I never used to be like this, only since I have been pregnant I worry about where he is and if he is ok. Especially if he is driving, his driving is shocking!
     
  7. Rachel80

    Rachel80 Well-Known Member

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    I'd follow him too. Gut instincts are usually right. I was cheated on alot in the past (not by my current partner!) & because he was up to no good he was paranoid about me. Needless to say I'd done nothing! After alot of weird coincidences I eventually got access to his Facebook & got all the proof u needed. He'd fallen asleep & forgotten to log out! It might be perfectly innocent but if he's got nothing to hide he'll happily show you his phone & Facebook! Good luck x
     
  8. Mummybexee

    Mummybexee Well-Known Member

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    Def don't do anything yet- get your undercover hat on!

    No wonder you don't trust him! I wouldn't either saying that- to be fair I'd have probs sacked him off after he admitted that but we are all different :)

    Good luck- hope he's not hiding anything
     
  9. Sophie_P

    Sophie_P Well-Known Member

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    I'd definately follow him, be prepared for the worst hun it sounds fishy to me.
     
  10. LauraMummyToBe

    LauraMummyToBe Well-Known Member

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    I've just spoken to him and he's trying to turn the tables on me.

    He's making it sound like I'm the one who can't be trusted? I don't have boys coming to the flat asking for me, I don't have boys saying obscene things to me in the street, I don't say I've cheated then say I was lying I haven't really done anything and I certainly didn't say "if I don't like someone, I'll just go out and cheat"?!

    I could understand if I'd said any of that stuff, I'd understand if I'd ever given him a reason to not trust me?

    He's tried bringing up a past family argument he was told about (this happened before I met him) me and my sister's boyfriend were accused of fooling around together which was absolutely not true at all! My sister believed me obviously, she knows I'd never do that to her and I'd protect her to the bitter end. But he's using this argument which had nothing to do with him... To make out I can't be trusted?
    He's just had me in tears as he was trying to accuse me of going near Andy (my big sister's OH) and fooling with him whilst I've been with him! :|

    Is it me or does turning tables make him look even guiltier? :/ xxx
     
    #10 LauraMummyToBe, Jul 25, 2013
    Last edited: Jul 25, 2013
  11. Sophie_P

    Sophie_P Well-Known Member

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    Definately. Ignore him.
     
  12. Jayjay027

    Jayjay027 Well-Known Member

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    I'd follow him too. I'd nip round to the flat unexpectedly and see what he's doing.
    But u do need to get those worries off ur chest. Are u going to follow him forever? I'd find out what he's up to and have a chat to him about how his actions are making u feel. X

    Tapatalking from my blackberry!
     
  13. H16

    H16 Well-Known Member

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    Oh hun. If I was you I would drop by the flat while he is chilling there and see what he is upto. If all is innocent when you get there and he is in fact on his own I would just make out you wanted to get something to take back to your parents house that you had forgotten.

    I think a woman should always trust their intuition. I was sus about my bf once a while back when we were going through a hard time - turns out he had been talking dirty with some girl that has stalked him for yrs and she was trying to get him to meet up (I saw all their facebook messages). He hadn't cheated on me with her but I went ape shit about it and it took us a good while to work through it. We are really good again now and I know it was just down to a really hard time we were going through. Made me feel better that he deleted his facebook straight away and has never used it since though! Facebook is the devil, far too many slutty girls n guys putting it about on there! xx
     
    #13 H16, Jul 25, 2013
    Last edited: Jul 25, 2013
  14. LauraMummyToBe

    LauraMummyToBe Well-Known Member

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    I've not got the fob key to the flat as there is only one, he's took it with him but I've got a friend watching the flat for me. :/ xxx
     
  15. H16

    H16 Well-Known Member

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    I think that is smart hun. Hopefully it is nothing anyway but at least you will know. Sometimes men are just weird lol x
     
  16. knopk@

    [email protected] Well-Known Member

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    It does all sound weird

    Tapatalking so cant see signatures
     
  17. Gsygal

    Gsygal Well-Known Member

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    my first thought was that hes planning a surprise or something. but now hes trying to turn tables on you, that sounds more sinister to me.

    I think you need to speak to him and ask him to be honest. If he just gets defensive and refuses to speak to you about it after youve explained how its worrying you, then id be inclined to call his bluff and send him packing. see if his story changes then

    hope its just a nice surprise hes planning for you tho
    x
     
  18. JoanneG79

    JoanneG79 Well-Known Member

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    For your sake, I hope he is innocent, but you need to know one way or the other what is going on with him. With him turning it around to be your fault is not helping his case though, makes him look even more guilty.

    Sending :hugs: your way.xx
     
  19. Rednursie

    Rednursie Well-Known Member

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    Something definitely seems wrong here. Definitely trust your instincts hunni. I would also be doing some more detective work. It sounds like he's hiding something alright-But maybe whatever it is isn't the worst case scenario? Hopefully it's not anyway. But keep a close eye anyway. This can't be easy while pregnant. Good luck xxx
     
  20. bbee

    bbee Well-Known Member

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    I don't know your other half so I could be completely wrong! and as you know me and my boyfriend are having issues! If this were me I would be quite upfront about it chick, whenever I'm worried about something I have to speak about it there and then or else it will take over me and feel I can't get on with things! I would speak to him and ask him what is going on, tell him exactly what you've put on here! It doesn't sound normal but it could also be something completely innocent!
    Why don't you go round the flat? Oh and the fact he's turning the tables is odd! It could be a guilty conscience? Is he acting a bit distant from you? Does he hide his phone? If you snatch his phone off him (in a jokey way) does he panic? Does he still spend quality time with you? - sorry 21 questions :p but honestly, my friends have been with people and I have caught them out cheating, I even caught my sisters boyfried cheating as I had my suspicions all along..
    Honesty, boys - I just don't understand any of them!
    X x x
     

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