Going it alone

[first1]

Has any one else thought about/actually given birth on their own?

 

[Missybee]

Yes. Women used to do it for generations. In some cultures, when women go into labour they go out and squat in a field somewhere they feel they can get some privacy. Since our culture is more sterile and coddled, the act of childbirth has become too medical and the prospect of doing it alone seems rather frightening. I do think about it though...alot. Nothing we women can't handle. We've just been conditioned not to trust our own bodies as much as we used to.

 

[CARNAT22]

Do you mean alone as in completely on your own? If so then I would strongly advise against this.

I assume OP means alone as in having no birth partner??

My MIL had all of her 6 children with just the MW(s)

FIL was at home with the other kids.

Is there any reason why you will be alone hun? Is it your choice or dictated by situation?

X

 

[Maud]

Do you mean completely alone or with just a midwife?

I was really surprised by how afraid I felt when I went into labour while home by myself and waiting for my OH to get home. You might want to have people available just in case you change your mind.

 

[CamFi]

no way. my baby turned the wrong way halfway through labour and the pain was excrutiating and didn't stop in between contractions. If I'd been alone, there's no way I'd have been able to function enough to get help and I might not still be here. I was low risk and very healthy, with no issues whatsoever during pregnancy.

 

[Mackmummy]

I personally don't think it's worth the risk if something goes wrong, women might have been doing if for generations but I'm sure the survival rates speak for themselves. I'm probably one of the most positive women when it comes to natural childbirth but that didn't stop me needing an emergency cesarean, had I been at home on my own I dread to think what could have happened.

 

[first1]

Do you mean alone as in completely on your own? If so then I would strongly advise against this.

I assume OP means alone as in having no birth partner??

My MIL had all of her 6 children with just the MW(s)

FIL was at home with the other kids.

Is there any reason why you will be alone hun? Is it your choice or dictated by situation?

X

It's my choice. My flat mate has offered to be with me, but I would rather just be left alone to get on with it, and only have the MW there when she needs to be

 

[TashaWink]

A lot of people still do it now. It's called free birthing. Look for some sites and get all the information you need.

 

[Allthingsgirly]

I've been to 2 out of 3 of my scans alone which i thought would be an issue for me but i was totally fine with that, as for giving birth i don't think i could go it alone even if the midwife was with me i would need someone like my mom to be there.

does anyone know if i decide to go ahead with my home birth would the midwife who would be delivering the baby be the midwife who's care i am under at my gps practise or would it be a midwife who just does home birth deliveries?

 

[Maud]

It will be whichever midwife is on duty. We ended up with 3, none of which was my midwife. In fact we only saw her again once after the birth and that was only by chance when we were seeing one of the other midwives for a postnatal appointment (she did give me a big hug in the corridor though).

 

[TashaWink]

All things- I have found that midwife teams all do things differently, I was under a team of people and I never saw the same midwife twice. But my friend who lives in portsmouth had the same one throughout

 

[Allthingsgirly]

Thank you.

Not sure how they do things in my area but I see the same midwife at all my appointments unless of course she was off poorly or away of course.

I just assumed it would be my own midwife who would do the home delivery but it doesnt really matter.

 

[BunnyN]

Birth choices are a very personal thing. I think a lot depends on what makes you comfortable. If being with other people stresses you out during labour it can slow things down, likewise if being on your own freaks you out its not going to help you progress. If you do decide to be on your own then its important to do research and understand any risks. Its a good idea to have a back up plan or know what to do when/if things get too much too fast.

Personally I visited a couple of hospitals close to me and was totally freaked out by them. They have high levels of intervention, c-section, episiotomy etc and didn't seem that intrested in suporting our choices. I didn't feel at all safe in their hands and I think that would have made it hard for me to concentrate on labour which may well have led to a bad experience and interventions. We found another hospital that was much better but decided it was too far away. I find the idea of a freebirth somewhat apealing but was not quite comfortable with not having medical help incase of an emergency. In the end we hired an independent MW for a home birth and she was perfect. She has a lot of experience and was suportive of our choices. She was there when we needed but was good at giving us space. She even left the house for a while after she first arrived and went to have a snooze in another room later on. If I had wanted her to take a more active part I think she would have been good with that too. My husband was with me during most of the labour and it was nice to have someone to do things like rub my back and get me water etc when I wanted. Around the time of transition I just wanted to be left in peace and although the MW and my husband were around they gave me space. Having anyone around that fussed, worried or was pushy during any part of the labour would have driven me crazy. I would prefer not to have a birth partener than have the wrong one.

 

[Nomad]

My concern would be that midwives are often really stretched and so you might find you're left on your own for a lot of the time. Birthing partners often feel a bit helpless, but honestly just having my OH there to pass me water/lucozade and fan me (summer baby - very hot labour ward!) was a massive help and I think I was much calmer than I would have been on my own. Having said all that it's obviously a very personal choice and only you know. You could always go in on your own but have your flatmate on standby if you decide you do need her.

 

[Kristine]

Hi, well the most important thing that you should consider is yourself and what you are going to be comfortable with. With your child's birth it is always your choice. So, good luck and God Bless you and your baby.