funniest thing you did in labour?

[fran_23]

i was trying to look up a thread from ages ago where people were recalling the funniest stuff they did while high on gas n air/delusional from pain..coz it cracked me up but i couldn't find it
so i thought i'd start a new one!!


i tripped on the pethidine and said all manor of crap to my OH who was busy trying to ignore me! thought the rubbish painting in the room was an amazing work of art where the sea actually moved and the dog barked but i didn't really do anything i'd find funny so tell me your stories...

 

[paradysso]

i dont think i did any thing funny, except telling the dr and MW to piss off and stop asking me to push

 

[Jade&Evie]

I didn't have gas and air (I'm hardcore, me! ) but the pain was enough to make me delusional....

I refused to put the hospital gown on after I got out of the bath and was on all fours groaning when a bloke came to fit my drip. With my arse in the air and looking like death warmed up I asked him "Where do you want me!?"

Afterward I had her while I was being stitiched up I asked my OH what he was holding.... it was the baby!

 

[hennaly]

i did chew up a snickers bar and said it didnt taste of anything so promptly spat it all out everywhere, the consultant came in to examine me and while he was in there my waters broke and shot up the length of his arm, oh i also told him he sounded black when he talked, he was black!!!

 

[Fluffy Bunny]

Ohh, I remember, this was a good thread.....

I decided it would be nice to go swimming while I was in the birth pool Poor midwife who was stood next to it got drenched as this big tidal wave of water poored over the edge - damn that gas and air

 

[Babylicious]

Weed all over the midwife and told her I would knock her out if she tried to take the gas and air off me again

 

[samandbump]

i was shouting that i was going to shit myself and kept asking her if i had!!!!!!!!!!!! and my bp started too spike so i was crying and hysterical thinking i was going to die

 

[1sttimemum]

There was a song on the radio - cant remember what it was called but had the line "Total ecstacy" and i sung that,

Then when Caitlyn was getting distressed, the doc wanted some blood off of her head, when she went up there, i thought i said it quietly but apparently not, i told my partner it felt like when he goes too far up me

 

[samandbump]

There was a song on the radio - cant remember what it was called but had the line "Total ecstacy" and i sung that,

Then when Caitlyn was getting distressed, the doc wanted some blood off of her head, when she went up there, i thought i said it quietly but apparently not, i told my partner it felt like when he goes too far up me

 

[MissSara]

I sang " the wheels on the bus" for 3 hours through my contractions, despite my mum telling me to change the song everytime i burst into it.

I also did a poo and asked if he was out yet, the midwife looked at me told me that i had done an accident and not to worry the baby would be the one coming next.
I laid back down started to giggle and shouted " oh well shit happens"......lol, thats when my mum wanted to crawl into a hole.

 

[kazlin]

Everytime I had a contraction I said ow ow ow ow ow, I sounded a bit like a cat! I also at the end shouted for them to take the pain away...oh the drama!!!

 

[Suzie and Faith]

THANK YOU SO MUCH
I've been in a miserable mood this morning and you've all made me cry laughing! I almost hope I do or say something daft... after all it's only fair to share these stories...

hehe

 

[kazlin]

THANK YOU SO MUCH
I've been in a miserable mood this morning and you've all made me cry laughing! I almost hope I do or say something daft... after all it's only fair to share these stories...

hehe

Have some babe

 

[evemarie8]

At one point the midwife told Brad that my brain was to juiced up from the gas to be able to make any sense, but I heard her and started shouting at Brad that his computer game was called Juiced and that he and the midwife were plotting against me and keeping secrets from me! When I demanded to know what they were hiding from me they just laughed which made me worse!

Also about 38 hours into labour, Brad pulled the gas out of my mouth just to show me that Superman was on the TV in the delivery room! I was not impressed! He still to this day thinks it was a "sign"!

 

[sally12]

THANK YOU SO MUCH
I've been in a miserable mood this morning and you've all made me cry laughing! I almost hope I do or say something daft... after all it's only fair to share these stories...

hehe

Ha ha...im the opposite! I was in an OK mood until I read this...what have i let myself in for!!!!

 

[Krystal]

These are brilliant.

I only have a couple and not quite as funny,

I tried to convince the midwife I knew her from a Labour programme on living tv

When the doc cam in to give me epidural he asked midwife if she wanted to examine me again first and I grabbed his arm and begged him to 'JUST NUMB ME!!!'

When the docs were checking the blood from Jack's head for oxygen levels I told them to give up and just do a C section.

When I was delivering the placenta and the midwife was 'down there' I kept looking down saying 'are you sure everything is ok down there

 

[mummysarah+co]

With my 2nd i had a room full of people 2 midwives and one student midwife my hubby and my MIL evil i was on gas and air and was a bit out of it and when ebonys head was crowning the stinging felt like id wet myself.

OH told me i was shouting out at the top of my voice "oh no, i've wee'd myself haven't i...do you think they'll notice lets just not tell them"

I actually hadnt wet myself

 

[daftscotslass]

There were workmen in the room next to me installing a birthing pool and making a lot of noise. The midwife apologised and explained what was happening but I ignored her, sucked on the gas and air and started singing the theme from Neighbours.

 

[Suzie and Faith]

Keep these coming! I LOVE them!

I'm the sort of person likely to sing randomly to distract myself from the pain.. i wonder what i'll end up singing. Lol.

 

[fran_23]

I sang " the wheels on the bus" for 3 hours through my contractions, despite my mum telling me to change the song everytime i burst into it.

I also did a poo and asked if he was out yet, the midwife looked at me told me that i had done an accident and not to worry the baby would be the one coming next.
I laid back down started to giggle and shouted " oh well sh*t happens"......lol, thats when my mum wanted to crawl into a hole.

thats brilliant!! punnage at a time like that you need a medal!!