Down in dumps / questions

[Kirstieplus1]

Am I being over the top?

It's just other than clothes my little one has nothing brand new.

My travel system was bought from eBay for £5 and although it's m&p and looks half decent I can't help feeling like I'm not doing my best by him. Is it wrong of me to want something brand new?

My Moses basket is second hand but I got a new matress.

Im also starting to panic as I don't have a cot... Is anyone else buying a cot now or just leaving it until bubs is too big for Moses basket? Money will be tight by then when only on smp.

Just really starting to feel panicked that he will be here soon and I don't feel ready (still need breast pump, thermometer, raincover, etc) but can't get this till next pay day.

Do you ever feel ready and prepared? I want it to be perfect. I'm a bundle of hormones and I could burst into tears right now just thinking about it.

Ps. I'm doing this alone as my ex oh of 5.5yrs decided he didn't love me when he found out I was pregnant although he has said he will be there for the baby although he hasn't so far!

Make a pregnancy ticker

 

[Geminiblue]

OMG Kirstie bless your heart I feel tearful just reading this.

Dont get a cot til you need it darlin especially if you cant afford it. That will give you time to look out for a bargin. Re the clothes, honestly so much of our things were second hand because I believe in a bargin and recycling AND because we had to draw a line at what we were going to spend. People buy you new clothes anyway. I didnt feel at all prepared right up til last minute, there is so much junk out there that you just dont need so please dont buy into the marketing hype that is out there for mums to be.

Do you know what... my over riding feeling is that you love your child, you have provided the essentials.... you are enough for your baby, who will love you unconditionally as you will love your child. Just take it easy and dont be hard on yourself
xxx

 

[Lilelephant]

Hun there is nothing wrong with 2nd hand our cot is 2nd hand and is gorgeous!
These things r expensive and just because things aren't brand new doesn't mean u don't love ur LO!
Alot of our clothes r second hand too as baby's grow out of things so quick they r always in good condition. Xxx

 

[Welshy1]

Hi hun, you're doing brilliantly!

I've bought very few brand new things for baby. Nearly everything we have has been given/lent to us or bought on ebay.

This includes car seat, pushchair, moses basket, bouncer, bath......the list goes on! I've even bought bundles of clothes on ebay, had 80 seperate items (shoes, tops, jeans, dresses, vests etc) for £5!!!!!

Baby only cares for our attention and love, throwing money at them doesn't impress them at all (thank god!)

As for the cot I've bid for a couple but not won one yet, am not getting stressed though as expecting Freya to be in her moses basket for at least four months.

You're a very strong and brave woman to be doing this by yourself. I'm lucky to have my OH and maybe should appreciate him more.

As for feeling prepared - no chance! Keep telling myself to sort out hospital bag, ante natal classes and birthing plan but as yet all three things are still on the to do list.


xxxxx

 

[Olive]

Sending you a massive hug hun.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with second hand.

I found some great stuff on gumtree. Definitely check it out, it's a great website for cots etc.

xx

 

[Hunnie]

All we have bought new for baby is clothes and pram! Everything else is hand me downs! I'd love to be able to go shopping and having for baby thats advertised on the market that looks amazing but i just keep thinking that she really won't care if it's new or used, all she is going to want is cuddles and food .

 

[Hunnie]

Just had to add, I'm 2 weeks ish behind you and I haven't got everything yet either!! So you're not the only one who isn't fully prepared !! Xxxxx

 

[ange34]

awww sweetheart dont get down and upset,i totally agree with what everyone else has said on here to u,theres one thing that money cant buy and thats a brilliant mummy that you'll be to your baby.im on my own too and money is tight,absolutly agree that there is nothing wrong with second hand.your priceless to your baby and thats the most important thing right hun!!! big hugs 2 u xxx

 

[charlotte2010]

I love a bargain! who cares if something is second hand or cheap.

I have 2 under 5's and all they want is my time and to play with them. They dont care about the money that is spent on them.

 

[suzzi]

dont worry about having used stuff think most of us do, as we all know someone whoes just had baby x even now when im better off financially we had moses basket and clothes of SIL and a cot of a friend, think of it as saving you money for other stuff

your little one wont know the difference and what will you do with the stuff once hes too big for it, youll pass it on to someone else or sell it x x x

 

[Cazza]

As everyone else has said, nothing wrong with second hand!!

Apart from a few bits of clothing all ours is 'pre loved'!!!

 

[lewisca]

There is nothing wrong with it hun This is the third time of using our cot, travel system (brought as gifts from parents with our first and were bargins) 5th time for the bouncer brought 2nd hand from a friend had a 2nd hand moses basket with the boys but after 5 babies using it the handle almost fell off !!
Rhea had very little brought for her new before she was born only brough 1 pack of vest and baby grows. But u should see the pile of stuff she has already and she is a week old and still have friends etc that havent visited yet !!! like the other girls have said all babies need is your love and care and that doesnt cost a penny !! xxxxxx

 

[star fish]

Hiya, I'm a week ahead of you and it sounds like I have almost identical shopping to you! We have been really lucky and been given most stuff so not had to buy anything much. We got our travel system/pram second hand, we got a moses basket second hand and just like you we are just replacing the matress. We are going to wait and buy a cot in a few months, it's not just money that is tight in our house, it is also space! So I will put the cot where the moses basket is when I need to move the baby into something bigger. We have been given enough clothes to keep him in 20 different outfits a day, I literally have bought one baby grow! So I dont think he will have anything new to wear at all. But exactly like you I still havent bought the 'extra stuff' yet, like a thermometre and all the baby toilettries. we're waiting for next paycheck as well.....

I think you are probably finding it much harder than me because you are doing it alone, and I know I would be in emotional melt down if my OH wasnt propping me up all the time. I'm sending you a massive hug and we will all be with you right down to D-Day (delivery) and beyond! But seriously dont worry about the 'not new' thing - I think you probably just want to buy your baby lovely things to compensate for your absent partner, but stuff him, the two you - you and baby - will love each other so much and comfort each other so much, you just wont care about whether your pram is new or not! xxxx xxxx

 

[BabyBrain]

I had 2 older sisters and 3 older brothers so you can imagine how much new stuff I had lol and I can't remember any of it. My cot went on to sleep my 5 younger brothers too so it was well used.

Apart from a few clothes all of Bertie's bits are second hand and I think in a way I am enjoying gathering them together a bit more because I have to go searching for them xxxxxx