Disrespectful husband.

[kumber]

I think it's difficult to ignore posts that complain over extremely minor things when you yourself have bigger issues at home or you see other mums having real pregnancy difficulties throughout the forum, without complaint. The issue there isn't the amount of complaining or the amount of questions, it's the fact that all those questions have been answered time and again on the forum and are often discussed in the month threads, and the complaints are often trivial at best.

When you've commented on numerous threads with the same advice and invested some personal concern in another mum's worries (which we all do otherwise we wouldn't be here!) and then it consistently gets ignored and the same or similar issue is posted the following day, it becomes extremely frustrating to the user who offered advice.

 

[babyscotcher]

I know it might be a bit late now Violet as you haven't got that long to go but you might find a pregnancy journal on here better and easier for you to keep all your rants in one place. Means you can look back on stuff easily as well which I found was great for a bit of perspective.

As long as you can appreciate that you are hormonal and therefore a little irrational that is the main thing. Just means that you have to explain that to your OH and communicate the small things that irritate you at the minute instead of exploding at him if you can. X

 

[violet13]

Okay kumber I get it! Don't like it then leave me alone to deal with I'm not going to post anymore because clearly my worries are such trivial rubbish then leave me alone but instead you've chosen to make me feel like sh*tand make me feel like I can't even post how I feel? Seriously? I'm really not in the mood most people have been supportive tonight which is all I needed, don't like me or my posts? Then back off I need support not abuse thanks. And honestly right now my husband thinks you need to leave me alone too. Do not post on anything I choose to post. I was worried the other night as I had horrific period cramps and you know what yes I posted because I was scared! People made me feel stupid because I didn't know it was normal!! How about you just leave me alone now?

 

[Emerald rose]

Violet dont feel you cant post on here about how your feeling. There are plenty of ladies here who are willling to offer you advice.
Unfortunatly we are all hormonal atm and end up saying things we normally wouldn't especially the ladies who are overdue and very fed up.

No need to feel stupid alot of first time mums are exactly the same i know with my first i was up the hospital all the time for stupid things but it put my mind at ease.

 

[Kiagirl]

My oh really tried during pregnancy but they just aren't programmed the same! My oh would prob have done the same thinking the dogs would be tired and leave me alone lol. I am really independent and didn't let anyone tell me I couldn't do something cos I was having a baby. I walked the dogs everyday before work, I have a horse which I mucked out daily until my waters broke and I still scrubbed the floors etc. yes it was hard work, yes I was tired but I wasn't dying. I think men are just wired differently and don't see things like we do.he won't be trying to wind you up, prob the opposite but hormones make us react! X

 

[Mrs_T]

I don't really know what the point of an online forum is if you're not gonna talk to strangers... Lol!

Violet hope you managed to get a better nights sleep. Ignore the few idiots you come across here from time to time, the majority of women are happy to read your posts, it's not up to anyone else to decide what's important to post or not.

 

[violet13]

I know I worry and I do post a bit sometimes yes about the same things but I don't have anyone else to turn to except OH and he hasn't a clue himself, we ended up cuddling most of the night and I was sadly awake at 4am but I've read a book and painted my nails while he was asleep so I got my 5 mins peace and quiet which is all I needed tbh. I won't be bullied into not posting as that's how it comes across. Not everyone has to like me but I'd not post anything horrible on someone's post if they where upset it's not right. Xxx

 

[Mrs_T]

I don't come on here much these days but it was invaluable to me during pregnancy, I've made some amazing friends on here but also met some right bellends

Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy

 

[DaniOwl]

I don't really know what the point of an online forum is if you're not gonna talk to strangers... Lol!

Violet hope you managed to get a better nights sleep. Ignore the few idiots you come across here from time to time, the majority of women are happy to read your posts, it's not up to anyone else to decide what's important to post or not.

Exactly MrsT, such irony that people who post the same silly worries repeatedly yet they clearly intend to offend a person. I think this person needs to go back in time 18 months to the first time they were pregnant and absouletly shitting their pants.

 

[Baby2sky]

Glad you managed some you time hun x

 

[kittykitchn]

Some horrid responses! Poor woman. She should be allowed to post whatever she chooses - if you don't like it, don't respond and move on!
I'm sure I'll be exactly the same when I move into this section, I do hope this isn't what I'm greeted with

 

[WishingHoping]

I find some of the comments on here shocking if I am honest..

It wasn't that long ago poor Charlotte came off this forum after a total b!tch had a go at her for posting something she was worrying about. People stood up for her & got made to look/feel stupid.

Pregnancy is F*CKING hard for some people & for others is a doddle. As Violet has stated she is on her own.. no friends & no family. I know exactly how that feels & its actually quite sad that some of my "closest friends" are girls I have spoken to on this forum yet never met.

Yes I don't completely agree with what Violet can be upset/angry at her OH for at times but its not my relationship hence why I keep my mouth shut. "Nothing nice to say? Don't say anything at all."

This forum can become very cliquey at times & maybe Violet doesn't feel she belongs in this clique because people are so fast to shoot her down when she is already feeling like sh!t.

Let the poor girl moan if she wants too. She has every right too. If you feel like you need to write something mean to her then I suggest you do it over private messenger rather than make her feel intimidated & make yourself look mean.

I appreciate not everyone will agree with what I have written & I will go back to Tri-2 now but just take a minute & appreciate this poor girl wants support.

xx

 

[WishingHoping]

Double post

 

[Bunny432]

What I genuinely don't get is the ladies that are now writing are now bullying another poster, are they not? Slagging someone off for saying something you don't agree with to Violet is exactly what you are now doing to the other posters.

To be honest I think it's all getting catty and nasty and there's no need for it. I think everyone should agree to disagree and stop with the posts.

Glad you got some you time Violet - and if I offended you in anyway I do apologise I probably jumped the gun without knowing your circumstances. Unfortunately that can happen on forums as we only tell the part that we want too, I was made to feel o couldn't post at one point and almost left the forum so that was never my intention to you as I don't think it was the other ladies either x

 

[violet13]

I know that bunny, you always respond kindly I didn't think you where nasty or anything but at times I do feel very down and I know I moan about my oh something rotten but I never hide it he's always seen what I've posted and he's said himself he's a d!ck at times but he understands I'm likely to go off on one now and again due to nearing the end of pregnancy and hormanl changes (not loving that part). I don't like being made to feel like a waste of time and space if I'm honest I'm not a perfect person I never will be and at times I need to moan and get it out the forum helps but I won't be kind to nasty comments next time and I will be brutally honest but I don't like upsetting people so I won't intentionally do that it will be a simple back off comment. I had 3 years of hell in a different country and it was old people being nasty bitchy and down right bullies, I was taught to respect my elders but after a while they either break you or build you considering they tried to poison our dogs and caused me and my hubby horrific stress I was in hospital because of it they are very lucky as my temper is absolutely horrific when enough is enough. Xxx

Simply if you dislike my posts please ignore them.

 

[Bunny432]

I get where your coming from I really do , I do have to say your response to Kumber wasn't very nice and now everyone jumping on Kumbers back - isn't that exactly the same as what you felt was happening to you? Two wrongs don't make a right and I just think it should stop now.

We're all strong, hormonal and opinionated women - people will always clash.

I'm sorry to hear you've been through what you have I really am - I've been through a lot in my life too but I know no one is this forum knows about that so I wouldn't expect them to be wary with their replies if you know what I mean.

Now take some chill time and relax! Your long awaited baby will be here before you know it x

 

[kumber]

Violet, at no point have I ever intended to make you feel like a waste of space and I apologise if I have done so. I have always tried to comment supportively, give advice on posts where you've worried. I think my post has been taken completely out of context.

I do not dislike you or your posts. I don't know you from Adam and, contrary to what some incredibly sad and obviously obsessive individuals think, I don't tend to pick on people. Those on the forum who know me off the forum know that I have had a horrific 18 months. Coming from that, I find it very difficult to be patient with posts that complain about playing Xbox or winding up a dog. There are bigger things in the world to worry about. By all means have a rant, sometimes you do need it. When it becomes a regular, at least once a week thing, it gets overwhelming for me. I find it difficult not to reply because I know how lonely it can be - I lived in another country for 7 years, I was bullied, isolated, in an abusive relationship, then in a different relationship (with hubby) and pregnant. You're not alone in how you feel but you perhaps unintentionally give the impression that you think you are. That's not to diminish what you're going through, but rather to reassure you that there are other mums you can talk with rather than at.

Your comment to me last night I think was unfair. Whenever you have asked for advice or shared concerns on pregnancy worries, I have commented with reassurance. I can fully understand where you're coming from with your worries, we all have them but you can also use your initiative to use other means of finding these things out. Part of my frustration on this subject is that I'm overdue and fed up - it is very difficult to see someone at 36 weeks asking if they're having contractions every other week when it's just normal pregnancy pains. By all means post a thread asking but the information is already on the forum from other mums, so posting similar threads over and over can get frustrating hence my reaction.

I don't intend to post on your threads again. I hope you have a smooth rest of pregnancy.

 

[violet13]

Kumber is like to apologise for having a go at you it wasn't really fair and I felt ganged up on if I'm honest. I didn't realise you where over due and just as grumpy as myself so I am very sorry for snapping at you and being a nark/b!tch. I got a bit over whelmed and I shouldn't of done it really. I know I post multiple times about the same things but it's how I get it out instead of having even more of a go at hubby which isn't fair either way cause I end up having a go at someone. Xxx

 

[kumber]

No harm, no foul chick. Hope you're feelig better today.

 

[violet13]

No kumber I wasn't fair and I know you just try to help when you can, I know it can be irritating when I'm moaning about stuff which tbf is kinda trivial at most when we all have more important things to deal with. We don't know each other very well, I am a nark right now and you've got a lot going on too. How far over due are you? I hope baba makes and appearance soon for you cause I'm in pain and uncomfortable now so I bet it's worse for you at the moment. I feel really awful about being so nasty I know we're all a bit hormonal but I could of been a bit nicer and I do admit I get worked up and I worry and freak out but at least next time around I'll be prepared....hopefully! I'm feeling better today a bit tired but I'll nap later possibly xxxx