Controlled crying - tell me your +ve stories!

[loz]

I posted a thread a couple of weeks ago about CC as Emms has been waking a lot through the night, seeming only to want a cuddle from me.

I tried CC but she got so distressed and vomited everywhere that I gave up and didnt want to keep going with it.

HOWEVER - I think I will have to try again as I seriously cant carry on much longer with her waking every hour and a half, just to suckle for a while. I am co-sleeping with her which I dont feel v happy about for the long-term. The HV from the sleep clinic has recommended CC.

Please tell me +ve stories about CC so that I can get the courage to try again! One guy from work said that he had to do it with his son and it worked after one night but that his son cried for 2 hours solid!

How exactly did you do it?

 

[LisaJ1986]

I've not done it myself but it's an option for me too. My HV told me to do it by leaving her for 5 mins, cuddling and saying the same thing to her, then put her down. Then leave her for 7 mins then 9 and so on til she's calm. I only left Angel for 5 mins once as i was at the end of my tether and needed to chill and she was sick too. So my HV was trying to come up with alternatives.
At the mo we're giving her weetabix before bed to fill her to sleep longer. It's doing ok so far.

For the lack of sleep though.

 

[littlepip]

I started this with ryan 4 weeks ago as i started work and he wasnt going to bed till midnight and he was also sleeping in my bed, First night he cried for 45 mins, then its gradually got down to 20 mins sometimes less now, altho its not proper crying and its not constant if that makes sense
I just persisted and he used to sleep 11.30pm ish till 8.30am and now he sleeps 7/8 till 7am! Hope it works forr you! I just went in every 5 minutes to give him his dummy and settle him a little

 

[loz]

'I just went in every 5 minutes to give him his dummy and settle him a little'


Emms wont take a dummy, so I dont know what might comfort her and help her get off to sleep?

 

[LisaJ1986]

Angel doesn't either. And she has lost interest with her thumb. So i'm in the same boat really. She doesn't even favour something to snuggle.

 

[beanie]

if you don't want to do CC there are plenty of other methods out there that will take longer but are gentler. Elizabeth Pantley is one person who has some good suggestions.

 

[loz]

if you don't want to do CC there are plenty of other methods out there that will take longer but are gentler. Elizabeth Pantley is one person who has some good suggestions.

Oh good - I ordered her book off Amazon about an hour before you mentioned it, maybe it'll help me.

 

[loz]

I started this with ryan 4 weeks ago as i started work and he wasnt going to bed till midnight and he was also sleeping in my bed, First night he cried for 45 mins, then its gradually got down to 20 mins sometimes less now, altho its not proper crying and its not constant if that makes sense
I just persisted and he used to sleep 11.30pm ish till 8.30am and now he sleeps 7/8 till 7am! Hope it works forr you! I just went in every 5 minutes to give him his dummy and settle him a little

Thanks for your help

 

[loz]

Angel doesn't either. And she has lost interest with her thumb. So i'm in the same boat really. She doesn't even favour something to snuggle.

If I get anywhere I'll let you know!!! You are not alone!!! Let me know how the food last thing at night is going, maybe I should do that too?

 

[LisaJ1986]

Angel doesn't either. And she has lost interest with her thumb. So i'm in the same boat really. She doesn't even favour something to snuggle.

If I get anywhere I'll let you know!!! You are not alone!!! Let me know how the food last thing at night is going, maybe I should do that too?

She has a whole weetabix at 9pm, then fall asleep. She'll sleep til around 2am! HUGE improvement for us! She only wakes a couple of times a night as opposed to 10!

 

[Beatlesfan]

here is what i posted in another thread about sleep routines a while ago.


I read up on: controlled crying, lots of posts around this topic, asked mums I knew and we sort of came up with our own way and stuck to it... that seems to be the trick...

so we agreed:

I would put Imogen to bed until the routine was established.
after feeding her in bedroom (lights low etc.) I would lay her on her back in her cot, dummy in and leave her.
I left her for 2 minutes at first because she cried almost straight away as soon as she realised mummy had gone and wasn't coming back for cuddles! then went back, she was usually up on her knees so I would lay her back down on her back (not pick her up to settle her or cuddle her) and put dummy in. say shhhh shhhhh a couple of times, pat her back a couple of times and go again. I left it 2 mins again, did this again and again, but extended to 3 mins, then 4... so here's what happened.

night 1 - she cried for 20 minutes (and boy did she cry!) before she was asleep. but I knew it was attention because she would calm straight away when I entered the room, or she heard me on the stairs - soon as I went...more crying..
night 2 - went in 5 minute intervals cried for 10 minutes
night 3 - didn't go in she was asleep after 5 minutes of crying (crying at this point was becoming less distressed/angry..it was more of a whimpering / grizzle)
night 4 ... couple of whimpers but no crying

now most of the time she actually goes off no problem, at most she whimpers or grizzles a bit.

during the day we put her in her pram with a dummy and blanket in the hallway and leave her. again, she picked this up really quickly and occassionally she whimpers or grizzles but nothing major.

We agreed we would not pick her up but keep lying her down and leave her.

Maybe we have been lucky.. I have a friend whose son has cried for up to 4 hours using this method. Personally I could not leave it that long . but this was on the advice of her HV ...

Anyway, I think they key is perseverence and consistency. there have been a couple of occassions maybe during the day where she has just not gone off and we have thought maybe she wasn't tired enough, so we allow her up and she plays by herself for a bit to wear her out (no real "attention" from us) and when we see more of the eye rubbing, ear pulling, we put her in her pram etc.

Hope this helps. It has sooooo worked for us. HV advised us at baby group whey back when Imogen was really young not to bother with CC or expecting LO to truly sleep thru the night until.... 1. she was on 3 good meals a day and 2. her daytime naps were well established. Have to say HV was right. Also think it coincided with LO learning to crawl so she was shattered and food intake increased also. Prob combo of all the things.

Good luck with it all. Occassionally we have a blip, but we rule out all the things it could be (pain, hunger, discomfort, over-tiredness etc.) before sticking to CCing technique we used before.

x x x

 

[Squiglet]

Well we moved lil miss into her room a few weeks ago... and as I didn't have the bed to lie down on and basically booby her to sleep we started having issues. I'd have to try and feed her standing up as we didn't even have a chair in her room and the minute her head hit the cot she'd end up screaming... one night (she'd been in her room about a week or so) after picking her up and putting her down at least 12 times, I just gave up... I put her down and sat by her cot shhhing and touching her head/face/tummy/feet. She screamed, vomited, screamed more, stood up sat down, screamed... I gave her a drink of water every time it sounded like her throat was getting sore. For over an hour she just cried...and cried as if I was murdering her.. I swore we'd have the police on our doorstep but eventually she exhausted herself and fell asleep and that was the first night EVER that she slept through... 10 till 6.

So naturally we decided to do it again... She got her booby and put into bed where she cried only this time she more just whinged... for around 30 minutes, then just sat in her cot looking sorry for herself, before slowly dropping off, and I had to help her down so she didn't bash her face on the cot bars.. Again she slept through.

The next night was the same, only she drifted off before just sitting there feeling sorry for herself.... but she didn't sleep through the night...

and then the next night she passed out immediately on the boob, within seconds. and slept through.

She still wakes up and cries... and she still cries when she goes down. I think she needs to have her cry, but I will try and booby to sleep than have her crying. But I tend to put her down, the minute she starts dropping off on the boob, and just leave my hand on her side till she falls asleep.

I never ever leave her though. I am always with her.... I feel evil to walk away from them if they are crying unless they have done something wrong like tried to bite my nipple off But this method sort of works for us.... so meh?

You do what you can... you make a battle plan which you have to constantly tweak and adjust as your LO grows wise to it..

 

[katie05]

Hi hun, even though my new little baby is quite good at sleeping my little boy (who is 2.5 now) was the complete opposite so i know how you must be feeling so first of all hugs to you . He was up at least 3x a night (on a good night) till about 4 months then is started getting worse and i was finding it very hard and he was becoming irritated with lack of sleep. After one particular bad night i went along to baby clininc and explained this to the H.Visitor. She said no way should he be up that much or even needing fed twice in the night at his age and weight. She told me to do the cc with him that night. I have to say i wasnt keen and actually cried all the way home. I
Anyway that nighthe went to bed as normal and on his first waking he cried, i went in and shusshed, patted him etc then left and lay in bed listening to him cry for 5 min (which was awful yes but i knew his constant waking was no good for either of us). I went back in and soothed again then left him for 6 minutes. I did this for about 35 minutes in total and made my gaps away longer each time. just as i was about to give up he stopped and went to sleep.

He then slept till the morning, and im not joking he slept through the night after that. We couldnt believe it! So, if i needed to i would defo do this again as is was no way as bad as i imagined. I didnt even do it to get him to sleep through just to reduce his wakings but obviously that was great!

I must add that he was 6 months old (not tiny) and having sufficient milk intake through the day.

Good luck with whatever you decide hun, sorry for the long story!

 

[trixipaws]

sorry but i bloody hated CC! it depends what ur style is, my boyf is very authoritarian and it was perfect for him but i sucked at it!

 

[clairescunny55]

we did it with both our kids, and they are now brilliant sleepers, apart from if they're ill. Ryan goes to bed 7pm till anytime from 7am. Millie sleeps about 9pm till 8am, definetly recommend it. although it did stress me out and hubby ended up doing it!

 

[clairescunny55]

just wanted to add that it took no more than 5 days with both of our kids until they were falling asleep on their own

 

[katie05]

sorry but i bloody hated CC! it depends what ur style is, my boyf is very authoritarian and it was perfect for him but i sucked at it!

you see i must go against the grain on that one as i am a softy with my kids but i had to do something and tried it and it worked. Have to say though im not sure i of coped with continuous nights of it.

 

[loz]

Thanks everyone, I am probably going to try again this week as I have a week off work. I'll let you know what happens!!

 

[loz]

Well I'm doing it tonight - started at 7.30 and she was asleep within 20 mins!!! No vomitting and slept for 3 hours. Then woke up, had a small feed and started cc again. Changed her nappy at one point. It's been about 40 mins and she is nearly asleep. I have been picking her up and cuddling her at intervals. Hope this works

 

[loz]

Ha sorry for so many replies to my own thread!!! Just to update, after my last post, Emms then slept until about 3 and woke up, had a feed and then back to sleep in cot with v little effort, then woke at 6am and back to sleep until 8! A big improvement and no co-sleeping! I am going to try again tonight and see how we go . . . .