Can't believe I'm back:-)

[BabyMaker]

Kanga, I'm glad you were able to have a brief chat and that he hasn't ruled it out completely. I've heard that adding a 4th to the mix isn't as hard as going from 1-2 or 2-3 as the baby just fits in around your other 3 from day 1. Perhaps next time you have a chat you can show him your 'pro' list and make him see things from your perspective and maybe there will be things on there he hasn't even considered.
Really hope that things work out for you re a 4th
xx

 

[kanga86]

Thank you ladies, had a busy few days with work so hubby and I have been like passing ships I was going to have a chat with him today but so far he hasn't had a good morning with the boys and he pissed me off hoovering at 10:30am when I didn't get to bed til 4:30am due to work! So probably not the best idea to ask about another one feeling a bit down about it as I don't think he will ever agree

Khtw I think the decision to have one will always be a yo-yo thing, even once pregnant you doubt your decision lol but through craziness is so worth it xx

 

[KHTW]

Aw Kanga, sorry you had a crappy day & didn't get to talk to OH. I'm sure there will be a better opportunity which may result in an answer that you want

Yeah I know it is never going to be easy but I recon once I am pregnant and the deal is done I will just get on with it

Currently trying (or should I say I'm trying to try) to stop co-sleeping with my DD. It is just so hard for me. Is it normal? My friends just moved their LOs to their own beds at a few months old and I am still co-sleeping and what's worse I love it I worry that she will refuse to stay in her bed alone if I carry on. What do you guys think? x

 

[BabyMaker]

Aww KHTW, if you both love it then that's great. Does your OH sleep in the same bed too?
As there will be a new baby coming at some point, maybe start trying to move her? A friend of mine got her LO off to sleep in her bed then moved him when she went to bed so he woke up in his own bed to get him used to the bed. Then she started introducing putting him to sleep in his own room and it seemed less scary for him that way as he was already familiar with the bed and surroundings from the mornings. If that makes sense. No idea if that is how you do it but it worked for them.
With your DD in your bed how does that work in terms of "special cuddles" with your OH?
xx

 

[KHTW]

DD has been in her room for over 6 month now but I seem to have moved there as well... I have a double mattress next to her floor bed. I gradually try to move the mattress further and further away but she still wakes up at night looking for me and always says 'mummy cuddles'. I just can't bring myself to refuse her.

But that's not the only reason. I get up at 5.30 to get to work for 7. I need my sleep and getting up at night is just not possible, I'd be a zombie the rest of the day.

OH and I struggle for time when it comes to intimacy. He leaves for work when I am back from mine and doesn't come back before I go to my bed. I am fast asleep by the time he gets to bed therefore it doesn't really matter which room I sleep in . We have yet to discuss strategy for when TTC in November - one of the reasons I'd want DD to sleep alone.

I am trying not to put too much pressure on either of us. I know once she is ready she will sleep alone. But still... it'd be nice to move back to my own bed. But both me and OH agree that we need to time it right so it comes with little stress to DD. Maybe next time we are both on holiday we can try getting up to her rather than staying with her.

 

[BabyMaker]

Ah I see. You must be like ships in the night! It's always hard to juggle work, children and intimacy, isnt it? Good idea sorting it when you're both off work. Sounds like you have a plan
Me and DH haven't spoken about #3 in ages I find that the best time to bring it up is during sex as he seems to get very excited about the idea of ttc. But neither of us have brought it up lately and now I dont know where we stand. I also dont want to bring it up too often as I dont want to put any pressure on him but I just want to know when he's ready!!! I guess I'm "scared" of bringing it up in case he says he's changed his mind or something *sigh* I think I just need to ask him outright. Sorry for the rant lol.
xx

 

[KHTW]

If only life was easy But then... it'd probably get boring fast lol!

Talk to him, but yeah catch him in good mood when he is more likely to give you the answer that you want I hope he says YES! x

 

[BabyMaker]

Ugh, hubby has gastric flu. I feel sorry for him but it spoilt my plan of baby talk last night haha! Will try again in a few days
In other news, I have the coil but I've felt a bit off lately - extremely moody, slightly sore boobs, hardly any bleeding during my period (I usually have a very light bleed but this time there was pretty much nothing), and a constant metallic taste in my mouth. The last 2 times this has ever happened was during the early stages of pregnancy. I seriously doubted I'm pregnant but I've heard stories that it is possible to fall pregnant with the coil so I took a test and it was BFN. I was very relieved - not only because we're not ready yet, but also the thought of all the complications of going through a pregnancy with the coil there. I've heard all sorts of stories of the coil embedding on the foetus, miscarriages etc.
And another plus - I got to POAS Obviously I bought a pack of 2 so I've still got one to use up
xx

 

[KHTW]

Oh noooo! I am starting to think your hubby is doing this on purpose Hope he feels better soon... Mine had a bug this weekend so I practically had two moaning toddlers to take care of!

I have no experience with coil and can't even imagine the stress of falling pregnant while this thing is in you.

At least you got to POAS and you still have one more left!!

 

[KHTW]

This is the 3rd month of me doing opks to pinpoint ovulation. I am getting a pretty clear patter - positive OPK on cd17/18 with loads of egg white CM, period 13 days after positive OPK. I am really determined not to poas when we start ttc!!

 

[BabyMaker]

Great news your cycles are regular!! Remind me, did you fall quickly with your DD?
Lol, I've promised OH I wont POAS until my period is late next time... But that wont happen. I think the longest I could wait is 12DPO. Last time i waited until 10DPO and that was hard enough!! I could probably wait if all tests in the shops were 25miu but with those lovely FRER's winking at me how could I resist?
x

 

[KHTW]

Haha I NEVER waited past 8dpo lol!!! Bought so many ebay cheapies that I could afford to test twice a day for a month

We fell pregnant month 4 so pretty quick. I was tracking ovulation and poor OH got dragged to bed every 2nd day during my fertile window and every day when clearblue was showing high fertility days (2 days). I really went overboard the 1st time and I don't think either of us enjoyed the process much lol. This is why this time i really want to CHILL!! x

 

[kanga86]

Hey ladies, khtw I don't have much advice re co sleeping as we kinda went cold turkey when we both had a few days off. I have usually found that my lo's slept worse when co sleeping with us and that was usually when we decided to put them into their own room. It can be tough to actually get them to sleep, but we found they then slept through with us not actually there.

Babymaker, I'm sure men time it well so that they can avoid questions lol hope he is better soon and you can have the chat. Scary to think you could be pregnant with the coil, but phew glad your not as that would be complicated and stressful!

I've been tracking my cycles too, ov is cd14 or cd15 and af arrives 13 days later, except the month of the chemical which was 18 days after ov. I will never be able to wait til I was late to poas! I was most patient with my mmc but that was before I was on pf lol then Harry I started at 10dpo and then with James and Alfie it was 8dpo

I managed to have the baby chat with hubby, and it went ok. Obviously it would have been amazing if he just said yes straight away lol but he was still quite firmly no, but he did listen to my reasons and how I want to sway for a girl this time. He is worried how I will be if we have another boy but I think if I can implement girl sway tactics then I think I will be ok as I gave it my best shot. We didn't exactly try for Alfie has he was a oopsie on ov day!! I also said he wouldn't be disappointed to have another baby or regret it but I would always think what if and I don't think this feeling will ever go away about wanting another one. So either way I will be the disappointed one and feel resentment towards him abit for not wanting another or he goes against what he wants right now, but won't feel like that once a baby is here. So I think he is thinking about it so got to stay hopeful xx


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[KHTW]

Kanga, glad to hear you had the chat! Getting it all off your chest and hubby listening must have felt great! Now fingers crossed he understands and comes around quick yay! x

 

[kanga86]

It really did feel good to finally stop stewing over it all, all by myself. We haven't spoken about it since, but tmi he was feeling frisky last night and I'm on my period and usually I would tell him to sort himself out, but I helped out haha For the first time in years! Hoping to keep him happy and more likely to say yes to another baby xx

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[KHTW]

Lol Kanga! I would never let OH anywhere near me when I'm on my period

I really hope he says YES and soon! x

 

[kanga86]

I know I can't think of anything worse! Landlord threw a spanner in the works today he wants to extend into the loft and it will put our rent up by £200pm from July ish next year as it will make the house a 4 bed (which would work amazing to have another baby) but I need to be working to be able to afford it. We really don't want to move from the area and other 3 bed houses are around 150 extra anyway as we got a good deal with our landlord before house prices really went up and he is really fair to us. But I feel so sad as hubby was worried about money anyway with his new job and stuff and this just makes it worse as I will need to probably do more hours at work too blah!!

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[BabyMaker]

Hi ladies, sorry I went a bit awol - I've had family visiting and it's been a bit chaotic.
Kanga, great that you had a chat and he knows how you feel. But how annoying re the landlord! Having said I'm always a firm believer that things happen for a reason and that positive thinking gets you what you want in life. So, maybe this is all happening because somewhere down the line you'll need that extra bedroom Do you still work for that dicky boss you had when pregnant with Alfie? Or is this a different job? xx

 

[kanga86]

Haha oh hell no, I didn't return to my old job and my awful manager, can't believe you remember lol I now work at McDonald's as a customer care assistant, so basically the front of house cleaning and chatting to customers. They are very flexible with how many hours you do and what days so fits in really well.

I do agree that having the extra bedroom would be a great change especially to have another baby, I just don't want to wait haha maybe I can convince hubby to ttc in June/July next year if I can save up some money to show we wouldn't struggle. That way I'm not waiting too long and we can cope with the cost. Would mean nicer age gaps to than having a go in oct/Nov this year as Harry will be nearly 7, James 4.5yrs and Alfie nearly 3yrs.

Hope you had a good time with family visiting, I guess you haven't had chance to chat about number 3 yet? xx

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[BabyMaker]

Lol when you mentioned work I remembered how sick you felt during Tri 1 and how awful your manager was. Glad you found a job you like Do you get free food??

Well, we have finally had the chat again. It was actually DH who brought it up. We were getting down to business when he asked when the coil is coming out... So we had a semi serious chat and I pointed out the pros and cons of starting in Oct/Nov vs starting in June/July next year. He said the most sensible thing would probably be to wait but on the other hand it would be nice to have a smaller age gap this time. So I'm none the wiser... lol! Oh and in the end he said "I dont know what's best. I'm gonna leave it up to you. When you're ready to get the coil out just do it". Which is great but I still dont know what to do. If I could choose I wouldnt want an autumn/winter baby which is why I dont want to TTC between Dec and May resulting in a baby between Sept-Feb. I find the newborn stage hard and with my DS I found the darker evenings hard and not being able to be outside more. Whereas with our DD it was summer and we spent everyday in the garden and going for walks and it was just perfect. But, I know that nature doesnt always play ball so I probably shouldnt try to plan it too perfectly. I told hubby I'm more inclined to wait as the nausea last time was horrendous and I was so pleased DS was 4 and I could put a film on for him or give him the ipad when I needed to lie down. Plus he was at playschool 5 mornings a week which gave me 3hrs of peace. If we go for it in Oct/Nov, DD would potentially be 18 months and I'm sure she'd be less understanding.....
Anywho, how are you KHTW? I'm so jealous of your countdown ticker. I'd love to put one up but as it's likely going to be June next year it'll probably look a bit sad that I'm on here already lol 10 months and counting....
xx