Back and fourth ttc.

[Onlylove]

One day i'm with it, the next I'm wanting to wait longer. Today i'm just confused. Anyone else feel like this some times?

We've been ttc for 3 months now, and it's like a roller coaster for me. I'm unsure if this is what I want right now. I know I want this more than anything, and I have the man, who has everything I've ever wanted in a man, but I feel like I want more. Last weekend it hit me.. I know he's going through alot right now but it was my aunts birthday and he just acted like he really didn't want to be there. Then last night we were fighting because I didn't take my TV from my dads house, he called me a bitch and I said, "You're a what?" Then he grabbed my shirt and for the first time he showed some violence. After that he asked me, if I was going to leave him and what if i'm pregnant. I feel right now like the whole reason he's ttc is to keep me forever and that's not a good reason to have a baby.

I love this man, but in the back of my head I feel I deserve much more in this life, and it hurts. I'm so confused, things just aren't the way they used to be. /vent.

 

[precious_cargo]

Hi hun, I dont really know you cery well through the forum etc but my advice would be to run for the hills. I grew up in a violent household and it has a major effect on children if u think there is a chance he could be trying to control you and if you think there is a chance he could be violent get out x.



Babydust to all

 

[Seb]

Hey hun, I really think you should see how things pan out with your partner before having children. I totally agree with precious_cargo but if you love someone it's difficult to leave and you can only do that when you're ready to. In the meantime I would put ttc on hold. Having a baby will definitely be stressful at times and it would be totally unfair to bring a child into a relationship that's in any way violent. I hope everything turns out for the best.xx

 

[corky]

One day i'm with it, the next I'm wanting to wait longer. Today i'm just confused. Anyone else feel like this some times?

We've been ttc for 3 months now, and it's like a roller coaster for me. I'm unsure if this is what I want right now. I know I want this more than anything, and I have the man, who has everything I've ever wanted in a man, but I feel like I want more. Last weekend it hit me.. I know he's going through alot right now but it was my aunts birthday and he just acted like he really didn't want to be there. Then last night we were fighting because I didn't take my TV from my dads house, he called me a bitch and I said, "You're a what?" Then he grabbed my shirt and for the first time he showed some violence. After that he asked me, if I was going to leave him and what if i'm pregnant. I feel right now like the whole reason he's ttc is to keep me forever and that's not a good reason to have a baby.

I love this man, but in the back of my head I feel I deserve much more in this life, and it hurts. I'm so confused, things just aren't the way they used to be. /vent.

it's scary how similar our situations are.. literally feeling your confusion right now! xx but he didn't actually use violence, he just grabbed me and was a bit aggressive x

 

[russellmuscle]

All guys have a hint of aggression its called testosterone. Dj has said to me in a heated argument and said that. Afterwards when he calmed I sat him down and said basicly its not gonna happen like that and if he wants a baby it has to be if he wants a baby I think guys just get all agitated when TTC it is a lot of pressure on couples davids getting annoyed with my obsessing already and this is my first month here!

 

[babyfever]

Being with a violent man is hard. Being with a violent man and having children is even harder. If he can't control his anger and puts hands on you what makes you think he will hold back with a child. I am not here to judge and if you stay thats your biz but I know from experience that its easier to walk away from an abusive relationship without children than when you have children. I would really put ttc on hold for now and focus on making your relationship strong. best of luck babygirl....

 

[itisbabytime]

if you have doubts about your relationship it would be stupid to bring a child into the situation. sorry but my opinion. also please dont be one of the many women out there who think a bnaby will change things or fix things. it wont. good luck.

 

[Sunbeam638]

Mmm I think any sign of aggression is a sign of a controlling type. Many years ago I had an ex who was aggressive & it started off with nasty name calling it went on from there. We went house hunting and he told the estate agent we were looking for a house so we could start a family, it was then I realised I couldn't bear the thought of having children I didn't like his attitude and the idea of children turning into him made me feel quite sad.

Two weeks after I ended that two year relationship. Something like this is totally your decision but if you have any doubt in your mind I would be taking that as an alarm bell.

4 years on and I'm with a great guy who never even raises his voice, don't get me wrong we bicker but nothing like that!

Goodluck & takecare xxx

 

[KMG]

Oh onlylove I'm so sorry your feeling and going through this - I agree stop and take breath!

Just remember we are all here for even if you across the pond!

xx