Right am after some help to make sense of my head atm lets me explain whats up
back in November 2010 me current partner told me him and his now ex suz were expecting a baby, but she just kept breaking up with him and threating an abortion just so she could get her way, eventually at a party one night he told me whilst they were broken up that he'd liked me for 5 years and i admitted i had felt the same. we never did anything about our feeling until after one night at another party one i was housing he received a text from her saying and i quote 'consider yourself single oh and when i get back to brum am looking into an abortion' everyone at the party told him not to go back to her he was better off without her and could still be in baby's life if she kept it. that was 23rd november 2010.
as they were living together he didnt want to be around her so that they could both think about what they wanted and sort themselves out, which left him staying on the sofa at mine.
I have a daughter from a previous relationship she still sees her dad and all.
on 15th December 2010 he asked me out and we became a couple.
he still went to scans and midwife appointments with her even over the Christmas period still tried to be nice and civil with regards. it wasn't until she threatened to jump in front of a bus and kill her and baby that we knew she wasnt stable at that time she said unless they got back together she would go through with it.
in the end we decided that he could just return and live there but not as a couple as they had always slept in separate rooms he did this until they found out the sex of baby (aboy) which was just two days enough so she couldnt abort the baby (i know its bitchy of us but it wasnt fair on the baby) he then came back to mine permanently. we kept going back to his to fed his hamsters and clean them out but only when she was at work so she didnt see me or my daughter as we knew it would upset her.
back in February 2011 on 17th we went back to his where she was still living to get the hamsters to bring to mine as it cost too much to keep traveling with a small child it was getting a nightmare. she came home 4 hours early from work and saw us and my daughter she stormed upstairs and refused to talk to him. we decided it was best to leave with the hamsters.
it again wasnt until two days later when we returned to get mail that she had moved out and left nothing behind. we found out she had moved back in with her parents. when we got home there were messages saying 'you cheated on me you lying scum, i thought we were going to get married' & 'never contact me again or i will call the police'. we decided from then on that it was best to wait until we knew his son was born then go through lawyers for him to have access. in the mean time between Christmas and new year she had demanded £2,000 for half the baby stuff she had brought without his in put. he paid only £750 as a mum even buying things new it dont cost that much unless you go designer.
July 2011 she had finally registered her son and we started legal proceedings finally in the October same year she said he could have contact only at her parents home for 2 hours once a fortnight he wasnt aloud to change or fed his so called son. she said he could only hold him for 20 minutes the rest he'd be asleep or been fed, when we said it was not fair. she turned around and said unless he was on birth certificate he doesnt get anything else and she wasnt going to put him on so he had no PR.
when we tried the only thing we knew to get PR a dna test she refused and said he could have the contact she offered or none. in the mean time she sent a list of everything she wanted him buy for the baby plus stuff for her for dealing with a nasty child as she put it.
I found out then i was pregnant due the same day her son was born.
needless to say he refused to buy anything for baby as we had already opened an account for him and had been putting money in it since he got his BC, so we said go for CSA she refused saying she didnt want to cuz she wouldnt get any money out of him yet he was working and we'd found out just for her that she would get 190 a fortnight for the baby and she knew this.
she then had ago at him for us been engaged and him been a step parent to my daughter and us having our own baby meaning her sons half brother or sister. she flipped then.
we have since had little contact with her as the lawyers said unless she said yes to a dna test we were stuck really. We then were receiving calls off her ex's saying they wanted a dna test too to prove they werent the dad of the baby and asking if we had them turns out she had been cheating on him when she conceived as the date she would of got pregnant she was in brum and when she returned he was in hospital after having a hernia and unable to have sex for 4 weeks. it put doubt in our minds.
when she rang and asked her about it she said no to a dna test and no for any of us seeing her son to have contact. she rang to find out the sex of this baby (aboy) and said he's not related to her son.
ever since we last spoke to her, i can't stop thinking about what her son is like and if he is my partners son and my son's brother. for some reason i can't get the bitch out my head on what her son is like and all that i know her parents are raising him as one of my friends just happens to live behind hers and updates my partner and everything. she is always out drinking and partying her parents are disabled and its unfair yet we cant do anything.
i want know if hes the dad or not and if so give the child a better life here, but i dont know what to do. am confused and why do i feel like i need to know what the child looks like and then need to know what they are doing?
its doing my nut in am fed up of it all, i want to know and need to know can anyone help me here please it gets me crying all the time knowing that he could of still bin with her and baby and be happy and yet he's with me and things are more complex than the universe. its so bad i dont even tell him i love him or kiss him 98% of the time as all i can see is her saying it....i need know what is going on our son is due in june
help me please
back in November 2010 me current partner told me him and his now ex suz were expecting a baby, but she just kept breaking up with him and threating an abortion just so she could get her way, eventually at a party one night he told me whilst they were broken up that he'd liked me for 5 years and i admitted i had felt the same. we never did anything about our feeling until after one night at another party one i was housing he received a text from her saying and i quote 'consider yourself single oh and when i get back to brum am looking into an abortion' everyone at the party told him not to go back to her he was better off without her and could still be in baby's life if she kept it. that was 23rd november 2010.
as they were living together he didnt want to be around her so that they could both think about what they wanted and sort themselves out, which left him staying on the sofa at mine.
I have a daughter from a previous relationship she still sees her dad and all.
on 15th December 2010 he asked me out and we became a couple.
he still went to scans and midwife appointments with her even over the Christmas period still tried to be nice and civil with regards. it wasn't until she threatened to jump in front of a bus and kill her and baby that we knew she wasnt stable at that time she said unless they got back together she would go through with it.
in the end we decided that he could just return and live there but not as a couple as they had always slept in separate rooms he did this until they found out the sex of baby (aboy) which was just two days enough so she couldnt abort the baby (i know its bitchy of us but it wasnt fair on the baby) he then came back to mine permanently. we kept going back to his to fed his hamsters and clean them out but only when she was at work so she didnt see me or my daughter as we knew it would upset her.
back in February 2011 on 17th we went back to his where she was still living to get the hamsters to bring to mine as it cost too much to keep traveling with a small child it was getting a nightmare. she came home 4 hours early from work and saw us and my daughter she stormed upstairs and refused to talk to him. we decided it was best to leave with the hamsters.
it again wasnt until two days later when we returned to get mail that she had moved out and left nothing behind. we found out she had moved back in with her parents. when we got home there were messages saying 'you cheated on me you lying scum, i thought we were going to get married' & 'never contact me again or i will call the police'. we decided from then on that it was best to wait until we knew his son was born then go through lawyers for him to have access. in the mean time between Christmas and new year she had demanded £2,000 for half the baby stuff she had brought without his in put. he paid only £750 as a mum even buying things new it dont cost that much unless you go designer.
July 2011 she had finally registered her son and we started legal proceedings finally in the October same year she said he could have contact only at her parents home for 2 hours once a fortnight he wasnt aloud to change or fed his so called son. she said he could only hold him for 20 minutes the rest he'd be asleep or been fed, when we said it was not fair. she turned around and said unless he was on birth certificate he doesnt get anything else and she wasnt going to put him on so he had no PR.
when we tried the only thing we knew to get PR a dna test she refused and said he could have the contact she offered or none. in the mean time she sent a list of everything she wanted him buy for the baby plus stuff for her for dealing with a nasty child as she put it.
I found out then i was pregnant due the same day her son was born.
needless to say he refused to buy anything for baby as we had already opened an account for him and had been putting money in it since he got his BC, so we said go for CSA she refused saying she didnt want to cuz she wouldnt get any money out of him yet he was working and we'd found out just for her that she would get 190 a fortnight for the baby and she knew this.
she then had ago at him for us been engaged and him been a step parent to my daughter and us having our own baby meaning her sons half brother or sister. she flipped then.
we have since had little contact with her as the lawyers said unless she said yes to a dna test we were stuck really. We then were receiving calls off her ex's saying they wanted a dna test too to prove they werent the dad of the baby and asking if we had them turns out she had been cheating on him when she conceived as the date she would of got pregnant she was in brum and when she returned he was in hospital after having a hernia and unable to have sex for 4 weeks. it put doubt in our minds.
when she rang and asked her about it she said no to a dna test and no for any of us seeing her son to have contact. she rang to find out the sex of this baby (aboy) and said he's not related to her son.
ever since we last spoke to her, i can't stop thinking about what her son is like and if he is my partners son and my son's brother. for some reason i can't get the bitch out my head on what her son is like and all that i know her parents are raising him as one of my friends just happens to live behind hers and updates my partner and everything. she is always out drinking and partying her parents are disabled and its unfair yet we cant do anything.
i want know if hes the dad or not and if so give the child a better life here, but i dont know what to do. am confused and why do i feel like i need to know what the child looks like and then need to know what they are doing?
its doing my nut in am fed up of it all, i want to know and need to know can anyone help me here please it gets me crying all the time knowing that he could of still bin with her and baby and be happy and yet he's with me and things are more complex than the universe. its so bad i dont even tell him i love him or kiss him 98% of the time as all i can see is her saying it....i need know what is going on our son is due in june
help me please
