What do you wish someone had told you about labour/birth/ after birth?

[Wednesday]

A few things..

- I had stitches as I tore, and I can honestly say it didnt hurt that much being stitched up. It was uncomfortable but lasted about 10 minutes and was fine. And Im a big baby for pain.

- weeing didnt hurt me either. I have no idea why, I was ready with the jug but it was fine.

- poo... that was also fine. It was the fear more than anything! Just hold a pad against your vagina while you do it.

- everything will be super swollen Down there. Dont look. It wont help. I used to get about 10 pieces of toilet roll to dab myself after a wee as it felt like all my insides had come out haha! Totally normal though.

- the midwife told me to put two maternity pads on. One on top of the other. It supports you apparently.

- you are likely to bleed looooads after. Like sooo much. Dont use always or any other sanitary towels - use maternity pads. Always and similar have chemicals etc and could make you sore.

- I bought maternity mats to put on my bed as I bled lots during the night. Worth doing!

- I didnt get piles like others describe, but I did probably get some internal ones I guess. I had a sore bum and bought anusol suppositories which worked no problem at all. Dont be scared, there was nothing sticking out of my bum!

- buy lansinoh and apply it to nipples after every single feed

 

[Loveandpeace]

one thing I am most dreading is lack of sleep. Really scared about this although pregnancy has me in training already but I bet its 10x worse with the baby

Just trying I was thinking the same today! I love my sleep and feel cranky if i dont get my 7/8 hours so I am in for a shock lol.

 

[megsmeadow]

Shanivy it may just have been after the forceps delivery, I can't remember if they did it last time. But she did pop a painkiller in at the same time which was fairly awesome

 

[Shanivy]

Wednesday That's a great post. Agree with all of it.

1st mummies it wasn't my intention to frighten you. Honestly none of it is as bad as you think

For example the 1st bowel movement was so scary. So I wish someone had told me about it and said "you will absolutely fine, it's really is just the fear of it. Place a maternity pad on your vagina and hold it there and just go for it. (They usually don't let you leave until you go) Holdingg the pad there is because it can feel like everything will fall out so it's just to ease the fear. It will be fine!

Bleeding afterward. I wish someone had told me how much it was possible to bleed so I would have bought enough pads. Also if someone had said buy more and use 2 at once when it's heavy that would have been great. Especially for someone who only uses tampons. But some women bleed 2 weeks and they're done. I was unlucky and it was longer. Also baby takes up so much time you do eventually get used to it as you have so much to do.

Haemorrhoids are crap but it does pay to be prepared as I'm sure some of you might have them and be embarrassed to mention them. They may go away by themselves but after labour they may not without some cream etc so mention them now.

If you do have a bowel movement during labour I can almost guarantee you * probably * won't know and will never know. Midwives will be discreet. If you can go before in early labour then do so. If not don't stress about it.

Wednesday is right about the nipple cream. Lanisoh is amazing. Don't wait until they're sore. It's hard to come back from that. Do it from the start and you shouldn't have any major nipple problems


. This isn't a "post the worst horrors you can think of " just everything nobody thought to mention and we had to find out ourselves. Especially for things that were crap to find out firsthand. Most of us are doing it again so can't be that bad. X

 

[cossie13]

I actually wish someone had told me that having a newborn can be boring... We got home with DS, sat down while he slept and just went "Now what?" I never felt tired enough to 'sleep when baby sleeps' so that never happened but in the first few weeks while I found my feet I actually thought how boring it is! Of course now I have a 2 year old terrorising the house and would love some of that boredom back!

 

[Shanivy]

I actually wish someone had told me that having a newborn can be boring... We got home with DS, sat down while he slept and just went "Now what?" I never felt tired enough to 'sleep when baby sleeps' so that never happened but in the first few weeks while I found my feet I actually thought how boring it is! Of course now I have a 2 year old terrorising the house and would love some of that boredom back!

My daughter will be 4, Im sure we're both going to find it very different this time lol x

 

[PeanutButter]

Unsure if this has been said but with your pads put a little water on them and put them in the freezer until rock hard. This was my life saver. I tore and had such bad swelling that even the midwives were shocked when they checked down there. I couldn't close my legs, stand, walk. Used these and withing the day I was getting out of bed by myself and the pain had reduced alot.
Also I was not prepared for the amount of pain (not trying to scare you.) but whatever you imagine it's worse. Never thought I'd accidently assault a nurse she was examining me and Jesus that hurt I was screaming at her to get out of my foof and she wouldnt so I pushed her. I was in tears so yeah be prepared for that. Also the gas and air makes everything funny but laugh+contraction= painnnnn ha. Good luck

 

[JustTrying]

I actually wish someone had told me that having a newborn can be boring... We got home with DS, sat down while he slept and just went "Now what?" I never felt tired enough to 'sleep when baby sleeps' so that never happened but in the first few weeks while I found my feet I actually thought how boring it is! Of course now I have a 2 year old terrorising the house and would love some of that boredom back!

Yeah I heard it can be lonely too

 

[Wednesday]

Forgot to mention...

I had stitches (not loads) and it was uncomfortable to sit down for about three days. It didn

 

[MissCharli]

I wish I'd known as a FTM that it can happen early! I think most FTMs expect to go late, so when I went into labour 9 days before he was due and 7 days before my induction I was a little shell shocked! I had my bag ready, but mentally I was all set for an induction!

I also wish I'd known that diamorphine massively affects your memory and makes it all feel hazy. Yes it was nice to be a bit woozy (esp with G&A) but I do wish I remembered more about the birth. I can't even remember if he cried straight away!

And the bleeding, I know this has been covered but I went in with some of the slim maternity pads. They were less than useless, and OH had to go to the 24hr asda! Even then I underestimated how many I needed, as I wore them for at least 3 weeks (even after I stopped bleeding at 2 weeks I needed them cos my stitches rubbed otherwise!).

 

[maddiemoo2212]

When I was expecting my daughter my sister gave me the book "I Wish Someone Had Told Me" by Jennifer Hacker Pearson. It is the best book for preparing you for having a baby. The author interviewed loads of new mothers and got their stories. It is literally all the things that women wish they knew before having their baby. It focusses only on the woman too and all the things that can happen to us physically and psychologically. Super informative and funny. I would recommend it to anyone. Good luck! Don't worry, after you read this you'll feel well prepared.

 

[GBLiz]

to my knowledge i didnt poo with either of my two!

 

[TORino]

My 10p worth..

The bleeding wasn’t that bad for me. It was only heavy ish for a few days and no worse than a bad period. I was expecting worse. What I didn’t like about it was the smell. It definitely had a strange smell to it. Think butchers shop.

I wish someone had told me that in labour you can be violently ill. I was vomiting for the best part of 8 hours every 10 minutes. I don’t know if it was the drugs, I blame the g&a.

I would recommend an open mind about the pain relief. I was full of intentions of not having much and I had every single one you can have. Morphine, spinal block, epidural, gas and air the lot.

The thing I most wished someone had told me was that afterwards you get a strange feeling like your insides are falling out. It’s really disconcerting. I thought I had a prolapsed womb or something afterwards. It wasn’t straight away either, like a week afterwards or something like that. Do your pelvic floor exercises ladies!

 

[Shanivy]

When I was expecting my daughter my sister gave me the book "I Wish Someone Had Told Me" by Jennifer Hacker Pearson. It is the best book for preparing you for having a baby. The author interviewed loads of new mothers and got their stories. It is literally all the things that women wish they knew before having their baby. It focusses only on the woman too and all the things that can happen to us physically and psychologically. Super informative and funny. I would recommend it to anyone. Good luck! Don't worry, after you read this you'll feel well prepared.

Sounds like a good read !! I read the netmums one it was sort of the same type of thing. I'd recommend a book like that too x

 

[Shanivy]

My 10p worth..

The bleeding wasn’t that bad for me. It was only heavy ish for a few days and no worse than a bad period. I was expecting worse. What I didn’t like about it was the smell. It definitely had a strange smell to it. Think butchers shop.

I wish someone had told me that in labour you can be violently ill. I was vomiting for the best part of 8 hours every 10 minutes. I don’t know if it was the drugs, I blame the g&a.

I would recommend an open mind about the pain relief. I was full of intentions of not having much and I had every single one you can have. Morphine, spinal block, epidural, gas and air the lot.

The thing I most wished someone had told me was that afterwards you get a strange feeling like your insides are falling out. It’s really disconcerting. I thought I had a prolapsed womb or something afterwards. It wasn’t straight away either, like a week afterwards or something like that. Do your pelvic floor exercises ladies!

Yeah that insides falling out thing is sooo lovely. I second pelvic floor exercises!!! X

 

[Shanivy]

Unsure if this has been said but with your pads put a little water on them and put them in the freezer until rock hard. This was my life saver. I tore and had such bad swelling that even the midwives were shocked when they checked down there. I couldn't close my legs, stand, walk. Used these and withing the day I was getting out of bed by myself and the pain had reduced alot.
Also I was not prepared for the amount of pain (not trying to scare you.) but whatever you imagine it's worse. Never thought I'd accidently assault a nurse she was examining me and Jesus that hurt I was screaming at her to get out of my foof and she wouldnt so I pushed her. I was in tears so yeah be prepared for that. Also the gas and air makes everything funny but laugh+contraction= painnnnn ha. Good luck

This is a really good tip for pads PB. And I would have done this if Id known!!lol xx

 

[MissCharli]

My 10p worth..

The bleeding wasn’t that bad for me. It was only heavy ish for a few days and no worse than a bad period. I was expecting worse. What I didn’t like about it was the smell. It definitely had a strange smell to it. Think butchers shop.

I wish someone had told me that in labour you can be violently ill. I was vomiting for the best part of 8 hours every 10 minutes. I don’t know if it was the drugs, I blame the g&a.

I would recommend an open mind about the pain relief. I was full of intentions of not having much and I had every single one you can have. Morphine, spinal block, epidural, gas and air the lot.

The thing I most wished someone had told me was that afterwards you get a strange feeling like your insides are falling out. It’s really disconcerting. I thought I had a prolapsed womb or something afterwards. It wasn’t straight away either, like a week afterwards or something like that. Do your pelvic floor exercises ladies!

Oh I forgot that! Yes I was being sick with each contraction before I even got to the hospital, they gave me some anti sickness injection (or maybe pills? it's a bit hazy) and it went away luckily.

 

[megsmeadow]

I was sick in early labour with my boys too, I think my body was just having a clear out.
Oh I totally remember an empty belly feeling that seems logical to expect but it sort of surprised me. I didn't get any afterpains, just a very squidgy odd belly feeling.

 

[Beauandhamish]

That if you end up having a c-section how bad the pain is when the morphine first wears off! And the first time you try to stand it will feel like everything if falling out of your stomach lol. And to buy the biggest pants you can possibly find, I took some in 2 sizes above my normal size and had to send my mum to Asda for bigger! Can't have been that bad though coz doing it again lol x

 

[Shanivy]

Megsmeadow I did get afterpains when I was breastfeeding and I was surprised at how sore they were! It was like having contractions again