Well I think it hit me this morning..

[Samsgirl]

Evening ladies...

Well it's 2 months since I lost the baby and I think this morning it hit me....all at once...at about 100mph

I was feeling very down anyway about work cos i am proper fed up with it at the moment...

Then one of the girls from the branch came in with her 7 week old little girl...it's the first little baby i have seen since the m/c. I felt fine.....went up and spoke to her Mum and then I got hold of her little hand and she gripped my finger really tight, like babies do and my heart broke....i felt it. I felt sick but carried on chatting and smiling with everyone..

Then 10 mins later in my office, just started crying! It was such a shock cos I honestly thought i was fine. maybe i have been putting a barrier up or a brave face for everyone, i dont know.....but that hurt this morning.

Just made me even more determined to keep on my diet to get to baby making weight...

xxx

 

[Mummy2Adam]

Sending you massive hunny, it can hit you at anytime, dont hold back if you need to cry just let it out. Even now 6 months after mine i still have days where I just want to cry when I think about it. We are here if you need us hunny. Great to see you have set yourself a goal to keep you busy x x

 

[Amyrose]

its awful how it just hits you WHAM out of no where! My little girl came home from school the other day with a letter for the baby and asked me to post it to heaven. I was heartbroken and cried my eyes out. when i think im doing ok i pass someone with a bump or someone pushing a teeny tiny baby and my heart just sinks. sorry your feeling down today hun

 

[Cazza]

Oh Samsgirl

I felt it a few weeks later too.......totally out of the blue, thought I was 'over it' but ended up crying my eyes out, so you're not alone hunny xx

 

[Samsgirl]

Oh Samsgirl

I felt it a few weeks later too.......totally out of the blue, thought I was 'over it' but ended up crying my eyes out, so you're not alone hunny xx

yep...i also thought i was over it. was actually just thinking what a heartless person i must be cos i felt so ok....obviosuly not! just took a few weeks to hit me....xx

 

[BritGirl05]

Hi,

You will never truly get over what happened but it will get better with time. Its the first baby you have seen after the miscarriage so perfectly understandable to be upset.

As strange as this may sound, its a good thing that it did happen as it has had a positive feeling for you as you have mentioned that you are more determined now.

I hope everything works out for you and sometimes a good cry is needed.

 

[Butterflykisses]

Samsgirl - it really can hit you at anytime and when you least expect it or want it to. The first baby I saw after my MC was my sister's wee boy. I was totally fine with it the whole way until I hit the hospital and maternity ward - it was only few weeks previous I was in the maternity ward for my D&C. Tears just hit me like a bang but I didn't want to wreck the happiness of everyone (me included) and got myself together. We all must put on brave faces in front of everyone but deep down it never goes away.

Hope ur feeling better now. xx

 

[specialk]

Aww hun bless you. I thought I was coming to terms with it but been crying tonight about it. I feel so alone. My OH doesnt ask me about it and it only happened 2 weeks ago. Feel I have noone to talk to about it.

A girl from my work is pregnant and due a week after I was due. She had announced her pregnancy at work but I hadnt. She has been off on sick leave since my MC. I know when I see her it will be hard cos she will probably have a little bump and I will have to smile and act happy. Only 2 people in school know about my mc. (I'm a teacher).

This is hard work girls. Amyrose what you wrote about your daughter is so sweet. My boys didnt know I was pregnant. I was dying to tell my 8 year old but didnt thankfully. Was so looking forward to telling him

 

[Samsgirl]

it's a comfort to know we are not alone....thanks ladies xx

 

[Spinneygirl]

I really feel for you hunni its good that you feel like that, it just means you are human and you are dealing with it in your own way xxx

 

[tinselcat]

Samsgirl

 

[knopk@]

big hug to you hun, your feelings are totally normal.
I remember a friend of ours announced about her PG and I would have been due a month before her, it hit me really hard although I was happy for them, had to leave very quickly and started avoiding friends who had children because it was breaking my heart, especially it was hard around the due date. But it does get better with time, I promise and you have the determination to lose the weight and start trying again.
Cry if you need to cry though, it does help.
I think for me the problems I had with conceiving was making it much harder, I am sure you will get your BFP very soon.

 

[Samsgirl]

I really feel for you hunni its good that you feel like that, it just means you are human and you are dealing with it in your own way xxx

how you doing Mrs? x

 

[Nurse 26]

Aww hun, it really does hit like a train

I have had a few episodes of tears out of the blue, can't bring myself to visit any of my friends with babies

Hope you are ok hun, best to get all you feeling out rather than bottle it up, I know exactly how easy it is to put on a false front and pretend you are ok to everyone else at least you can get it all out on here

Xxxx

 

[laurat]

Oh honey Im sorry you feel this way! Strangely yesterday I ended up silent crying in the kitchen when my hubby was in the shower. He had no idea and I said I was cutting onions! Its funny how it just hits you out of the blue! So damn hard sometimes! I wasnt even around a baby but we are also trying to sell our house and had yet another viewer who said it wasnt for them! Ive just kind of had it and the lovely woman in my work who is like my mum and was the one I phoned on the morning of my mc semt me a message asking how the vewing had gone! All just kind of got to me as I was thinking I would have been going for a 20 week scan in 2 weeks!

We will all get there! It is comforting to know you arent the only one!

 

[Bead]

Sending you big hugs samsgirl. I know how you feel... the 'episodes' happen less and less often, but they're still hitting me out of the blue, even 4 months later.
I hope you're doing ok today xxx

 

[heartbroken]

aw hun massive .. Grief can be so unpredictable, you think your getting better and the next miniute it feels as if it was only yesterday it happend. you have been so strong the last 2 months. Sometimes i think its better to let it all out xx

 

[Samsgirl]

feel much better today ladies......positive opk...so trying to keep OH off me is an issue..he he...roll on august!!! cant wait to be in a 2ww again...never thought i'd say that

xx

thanks all for your lovely comments

 

[Cazza]

Oh bless you - glad things are looking brighter hun!!!

xx

 

[Corrinne37]

hey Samsgirl,
your definitely not alone!!! Losing a baby at whatever stage - HURTS LIKE HELL - and something you will never forget.
I try to comfort myself by realising just how common it is and just how many women go through it and then go on to have normal pregnancies and carry to full term.
As hard as it is , its natures way that something just wasnt right.
But I dont think anyone can under estimate the deep emotion and profound stress it causes and just how much it hurts until it happens to them.
Much love to you. xxxx