I know where you are coming from and don't put yourself down. DH and I had a massive argument a couple of months ago over something so stupid Im not even going to go into it. He said all these awful things to me and about me while I sat crying. At the end said he couldnt contemplate having a baby with me as apparently the next step for him was divorce.
We were supposed to be going away for the weeknend the following evening so i thought that was out the window. The next morning, we tread carefully around each other. Neither of us offiically apologied but we did go away on our weekend and we did BD.
So more or less everything he said was just in the heat of the moment.. we are both under a lot of pressure as we look after his mum who is unwell. Sometimes it is good to have these little ructions just to clear our minds and our heads and nearly all of the time, it works out once both have had the time to cool down and have a little thing. Wishing you the very best in everything you do xxx