To Wait or Not to Wait - that is the question?

[5Element]

Hi everyone!

I am just really curious what your opinions are as I have heard so many different things from different docs.

When would you recommend to start TTC after a MC? (sorry if there are already lots of threads on this!) Especially if you have a natural MC (also though what about after a d&c?). I hope this question doesnt upset to many ladies. I have heard/thought everything from TTC straight away to wait for 3 months AT LEAST! I am totally unsure. My gut feeling is to wait at least for one period then see how I am.

Right now I am happy to being able to think this far but would love to get a non-doc view point on this!

Thank you very much for your comments!

 

[CARNAT22]

Hi hun,

I had a BFP on 19th September and an early (natural) m/c on 25th September.

I had another BFP on 25th October and that ended in M/c again at 5w.

I am not sure if it made any difference to be honest BUT having two losses in consecutive months was horrible - emotionally and physically.

If you can maybe give yourself a cycle or two to get back in the swing of things?

xxxxxxxx

 

[kanga86]

Sorry for ur loss I had a dnc 26th August last year after my mmc in june and we tried after my first AF on 23rd sept, we got pregnant first go and my lil man is now 7 weeks old I would definitely recommend waiting til u have had at least one AF before ttc again. Xx

 

[kiwifrootkai]

I agree to give your body a rest for at least a cycle or two - you've been through a big ordeal hun, and a rest can only benefit you and prepare you for your next BFP, physically and emotionally.

When I lost my baby I was hoping to become pregnant straight away in the weeks afterwards, but after a few weeks past I felt that it was best that I wasn't so soon. Even now, three years later I know I'm not emotionally ready for another baby because I'm still hurting over the one I lost. Looking back I was not in the right frame of mind to have lost one then gained another so soon.

I'm not saying it will be the same for you, but it can only benefit you to follow the healthcare providers advice

xo

 

[lisey27]

Hi,

so sorry for your loss x

I have had 2 miscarriages, both natural- with the first one I tried after one AF (this is what the hospital specialist said was ok) I found it very emotional and I became obsessed, it took 5-6 cycles to conceive again. With my last MC I waited 3 months and I feel more grounded, I needed that time to heal.

Its a very personal thing, it depends how you and your OH feel but it seems that it is recommended to wait for one cycle at least xx

 

[jojo3972]

I tried right away mostly due to my age 40 next week so time is running out for me I didn't get first af for 7 weeks anyways and by then my body was fully recovered I'm now in my second full cycle and hoping for a bfp for my 40 th xx gd luc with what u decide xxxx

 

[lizsamuel80]

I Know heaps of people who have got pregnant straight away after a natural MC and everything has been OK. My mother in aw was pregnant with my OH without having an AF after a D&C. I really don't think it truly matters.

 

[5Element]

Hi Everyone!

Thanks so very much for your wise words of wisdom! It is good to hear what the docs say but even better to read how it really is!
As this is my second mc, one straight after another, I think my body is trying to tell me to take a break so 1 cycle is definately on order and then see how things are. It will also give me time to work on the fact that my biological clock is ticking alittle too loud and my fear of losing another smartie!

I look forward to being back in the ttc forum soon!

 

[Bella2]

I had a MC in November 2010 and then a D&C, waited a couple of cycles before trying again as felt I just needed that emotionally more than anything else. Fell pregnant in the 2nd month of trying lots of luck to you, sure you will get a BFP and a sticky bean very soon x x

 

[Juice]

I had a natural MC last week. At my follow up, I was told to wait until after I've had my first proper period before I ttc again. The bleeding from the MC has pretty much stopped now, so we will be using contraception until my next AF and then after that we'll TTC.

I think this is pretty standard unless there is some sort of complication, or a scan shows that all products of conception haven't been passed.

Good luck!

 

[Sue Clare]

After my 2nd mc, my GP advised that we wait
3 months before ttc again! We ended up waiting 12 months!
Xx

 

[5Element]

This is the bit that confuses me - this is my second mc in a row and all the docs seem to say different things - wait 1 cycle, wait 3 months, dont wait.....

At this moment in time I just want to wait for 1 cycle then go for it! We will see, one step after another.

Thanks everyone!

 

[Becky1]

So glad you asked the question, I was going to post the same thing. When I had my op the nurse at the pre op assessment said at least 2 cycles. The nurse discharging said 1! We are definitely waiting 1 and will then see how we feel but at the moment I can't see us waiting longer than 1 cycle. I think one of the reasons they say wait is so it can be dated easier if you do catch again.

The nurse also told me not to use tampons for the 1st period after... Not sure why? I hate not using tampons

xx

 

[Juice]

I was also told not to use a tampon. I asked at my follow up scan, if all products of conception are gone, why can't I use tampons for the last of my MC bleeding? She said that it's because there's a higher risk of infection because the cervix is still slightly open. For this reason, we were also advised to use condoms when we have sex.
The first period thing was because it's often heavier than a normal period and can contain clots which can't be absorbed by a tampon, and maybe some tiny bits of tissue that weren't expelled during the MC.

 

[5Element]

Thanks Juice for this! I didnt know this either! There is so much you should know and do but when you are going through this the only thought you have is WHY ME?

Wishing everyone some peace soon!! XXXX

 

[Juice]

I know what you mean. At my first scan when I found out, I couldn't take in anything they were saying. 2 weeks later at my follow-up scan, I was in a much calmer state when I went for my follow up so I was more able to concentrate on what they were saying.

I'm still going through the 'why me' bit. We have friends who are 38 and 45 and had their first child last year and are pregnant again with their second due in November. I just keep thinking, they're older and she's got all sorts of health problems. I'm 21 and healthy, so why is it me this has happened to me?

I just tell myself that it's one of those things and that the timing was wrong. It's frustrating that I'll never actually know, but to know that it's not really out of the ordinary is a comfort.

Message me if you need to talk about anything

 

[BunnyN]

I'd think how long you wait partly depends on how far along you were, the further along the more it must take for your body to recover. I believe I had a chemical pregnancy in July. A chemical pregnancy is such an early MC that I don't think it makes a huge difference physically. Generally there is no need to wait to try again after a chemical pregnancy but for emotional reasons I planned to wait a couple of months... but got pregnant the very next month, which was kind of an accident! I have read that it can be easier to get pregnant soon after a MC because the hormones for pregnancy are still around but I don't know how much truth there is in it.

Sorry for all of you who have suffered a loss.

 

[timtam78]

Hi guys. I had my ERPC yesterday and I spoke to one surgeon (who I didn't particularly like that much) who said best wait until early 2013 to try again. I cannot stand that thought. I don't know whether he advised so long because I was 11 wks into my pregnancy when the heartbeat stopped. He said the risk of miscarriage is higher if you try straight away. I'm not sure whether to believe him as I've read so much conflicting information, even from the miscarriage association website. They even say themselves that fertility is higher in the first sixth months following mc.

I think we will wait at least till my first AF, which could be a while away as I usually have long and irregular cycles. But I really would like to start trying again as soon as we can. I'm 34 in Nov and I just feel like time is running away and I would like to have more than one, I don't want to waste any time. X

 

[Lilybell]

It has been so helpful to read this thread. I got pregnant for the very first time 2 weeks ago after 3 months TTC. I was over the moon and did test after test. Three times they said Pregnant 1-2wks, and then on the 4th one, Not Pregnant. And now I have been bleeding for the last two days. I am coping fine because I understand the biology of it and how common this can be, but . . .I'm 39 and really wish to start a family with my OH (I only just found him!). So it sounds like I don't have to wait too long to try again. Thanks ladies xx

 

[5Element]

Hi Everyone!

Just wanted to see how everyone is doing. Thank you so much for keeping up the thread here. I hope my/our experiences go to help others ladies that have to go through this too!

I havent been online for quite a while now as I had my mum here last week (told her that she WILL BE a granny in the not tooooo distant future) but the shock that I had lost 2 sat pretty deep with her. Then after 3 weeks of naturally trying my doc said I should have a d&c which I had yesterday. That was certainly the best thing I could have done, I was totally exhausted after losing so much blood over 3 weeks and I was beginning to get ill. I dont regret waiting one bit and it felt right to give my body the chance to do it naturally but today, although I feel a "healthy" very tired I feel much better and can start to move on. Also the hospital were fantastic and have been testing me for things and giving me so much advice on what I should do for the next time! I read so much about the OP on here and thanks to the ladies on here I was not in the least bit worried about it - more the anasthetic than anything but the drugs you get after that helped alot! Now I am home and can start to move forward with ttc after my first AF (looking forward to that I can tell you!)

Sorry it got alittle long! Wish everyone here some peace!! XXXXX