success stories needed plz

[BunnyN]

It sounds like you are coping great under the circumstances. Getting enough sleep to function is a good start . And just remember one day she will sleep through the night in her own bed. Our 3 year old slept solidly from 10pm to 7:30 last night. It seems like yesterday I was up 20 times in the nigh with her. As long as you can survive the day to day bit time will fly by!

 

[beanie5]

uh so much for 'whatever works' last 3 nights, nothing has worked
first night woke up at 4.15am and couldn't get her back to sleep, second night woke at 3.15am, couldn't get her back to sleep, last night woke at 1am and i couldn't get her back to sleep (til 5am when she slept til 6.45)
this is ridiculous. gaviscon is coming back out tonight, hv has suggested upping her food, we did last night with her dinner and will be introducing breakfast from tomorrow after i've been out today to buy some.
i don't know how long i can keep doing this. it was looking bearable once i'd decided that if we're struggling i'll just put her in with me but she wont even sleep with me at the moment, wont sleep in her cot, wont sleep on me, wont sleep being bounced, wont sleep being rocked. i'm out of options

 

[flexilexi394]

Does she cry if you just leave her in her cot? Or does she quite happily lay there? If she doesn't sleep but can be left alone then maybe just leave her to "play" or whatever she's doing? Of course if she's crying it is hard to know what to do, whether to leave her and try settle her every 5 mins, it is almost impossible to solve isn't it! xxx

 

[beanie5]

it really is she has a meltdown if left and doesn't respond to comforting in the cot, i tried to distract her with her slumber buddy last night in the hope she'd eventually fall asleep but after about 5 minutes of it seeming to work she started going into meltdown mode

 

[flexilexi394]

Oh god :O I really don't know what else to suggest it must be horrible and so so tiring, I really hate sleep deprivation so I bet you are just ready to move to a hotel! I hope giving her an extra meal works - that might make a massive difference. Just try not to get too worked up, easier said than done of course but the more stressed you are then she will pick up on it I guess, I am so sorry I have no more advice for you lovely I feel so bad for you xxxxxx

 

[kumber]

Having come out of the other side of 2 hourly boobing both day and night, and a child that SCREAMED whenever we tried to rock him to sleep, I completely understand where you're coming from. We don't use any crying methods at all either. Once I cut out the daytime milk at about 9 months, we slooowly started to see a difference and he finally took a dummy a week ago. This is the first time he's ever slept without crying.

He's had horrific reflux and tongue tie (which made the reflux worse). I would be asking for omeprezole. Skip the ranitidine and go straight for the good stuff. Be careful though because too much omeprezole and it affects their sleep (the irony!!).

We are at a week shy of 11 months and he's only just stopped waking every 2 hours. Exhaustion doesn't adequately describe how you feel. It's just not a big enough word. I also have a 2 year old so I spend my days running around and playing. I've broken down into a sobbing, incoherent wreck more times than I can count.

Your lo will sleep. When, no one can say, which for me is the most crushing aspect of it. There's no end to the torture. You will get there, just keep swimming!

 

[mummywanabe]

Sleep deprivation is the worst I remember thinking the same as you, what have I done!! My son had colic, reflux and milk allergy and also worst the worst teether ever, I really had to think hard about having a second baby but it will get better I can't tell you when but it will, can anyone take your baby for a night just to let you get a break?

 

[mummywanabe]

Just a thought actually has LO been checked for a milk allergy? They can get it on formula or even breast feeding. Just what you've written reminded me so much of my son, once he changed to nutramigen formula he settled massively

 

[Kholl]

Milk allergy is a really good thought. That was the case with my son; I gave up dairy and soy and it definitely helped.

 

[beanie5]

thanks for the replies, she's not been tested for milk allergy, dr and hvs just keep saying reflux but i'm really not convinced
fri/sat & sun i thought we had a breakthrough, she was awful to settle but when she did she slept 2-3 hour chunks, the most she's done for 4+ months, then monday night it all went to pot again. she's put on a mammoth 12oz in the past fortnight so i'm wondering if she had a growth spurt over the weekend and that was the cause of the 'good' sleep

hv is coming round next tuesday and asked me to keep a food diary in the week up to it to see if there were any 'tweaks' that would help her sleep so i started that last night and thought it'd be a good idea to write down the sleeping times... so last night was:
7pm up for bed
8.10 asleep in bed
9.45 woke up
10.25 asleep in bed
10.40 woke up
10.55 asleep in bed
11.50 woke up
00.15 asleep in bed
2.35 woke up
4.48 asleep in bed
6.10 woke up for the day
that's an average night not a bad one

i read a post on another forum about nurseries and someone was saying how one of the babies was really struggling to adapt because they had all the 'bad' habits from home and it's made me feel awful, i can only get lo to nap either in the pram or attached to my boob, i'm due back at work in 8.5 weeks and she'll be in nursery 1.5 days a week and with her nanny 2 days and i have no idea what i'm going to do.

i'm such a failure as a mum i really think she'd be better off if she had someone else to look after her

 

[MrsS15]

Beanie, please don't think that. You're totally sleep deprived and at the end of your tether so don't think about anything like that. By asking for help you're already a wonderful mum!

Is Emma ebf? How much food is she having during the day on top of feeds? What medication is she on for reflux? Also, does she sleep in her own room or is her cot still in with you?

I had a nightmare time with my son and sleeping, but he has behavioural difficulties and at nearly 8 still doesn't sleep before 11pm at night (that's a good night). When he was younger I didn't know this though and we massively struggled with him. At 7 months he refused to go to sleep on his own, he had to be sleeping on one of us then would get up hourly at night. We tried everything and he refused. I was so against controlled crying but eventually I used a method that's softer and only for over 6 month olds. After 3 nights of using it he self settled at night and slept a solid 6/7 hours then would wake and go back to sleep. I would do it again in a heartbeat. I'm not advocating CC but this other method was a life saver for me. If Emma has nights she sleeps better then you know she's capable of doing it so may be worth looking into some methods you may find suits you as a family? Our sleeping issues obviously came back but as it's behavioural we know it'll always be an issue. We've been involved with sleep Scotland too, as at 14 months our son could climb out his cot creating whole new issues. We were advised to do back to bed routine with him and keep a diary of progress. On his first night he got up 77 times!!!! But we persevered and by night 7 he didn't get out his bed at all. I feel like a master with sleep issues, they've plagued me my whole motherhood

There is an end in this for you hun, I think the fact you're going back to work soon you're feeling more pressure to get on top of this. Sorry if I've repeated what others have said but if I can help at all, let me know. I hope you're okay, please don't beat yourself up xxx

 

[Rooster30]

Oh goodness, I am so sorry to hear you are struggling... You are not a bad mum, and you are looking after her so well, you're talking to GPs and HVs to try and solve it and that would be my strongest advice of all. Keep pestering them if you aren't happy. Take the breaks and let other people help out with your LO.

You are not a failure and to be honest some of us ladies are just darn lucky if we get good sleepers - not because we've done anything special. My son was a pure horror but my daughter always slept throughout the night even as a newborn. Pure luck.

I haven't read all the posts but I think talking to your HV and GP is good so you can knuckle down and try to discover is LO is suffering at all. Secondly, I'd recommend getting help from grandparents - you need your sleep. I am quite big on routine, and it seems to work well for my two. My HV recommended CC to me after 8 months of no sleep with my son (obviously not to everyone's favour and that's fair enough, just saying that this is what my health professional told me in the darkest of my days).

All the very best and I truly hope you get to get some sleep very very soon.

 

[Karenb]

I haven't read all responses but thought I'd share. I know you don't want to co sleep but it got me through!! I breastfed and she just wanted to be on me all night so the only way I slept was to feed lying down. Tried putting her in her cot at 6 months but she just wasn't ready. At 9 months I tried the gradual retreat method as advised by a sleep councillor and within three nights I was feeding her, putting her down, she'd whimper for a couple of minutes but then sleep through. After a week she didn't even whimper. I never ever thought I'd see the day when I could breastfeed her, then just pop her down awake but I just had to wait until she was ready. You need to think short term, about how you will cope right now. Babies adjust so quickly so you wouldn't be giving in to co sleeping forever X

 

[Karenb]

Oh also, my lg only slept in pram or on boob too... But guess what, she sleeps for nursery!! God knows how but it just works out! She still naps in her pram at 14 months for us!

 

[beanie5]

MrsS yeah she's ebf, on 3 meals a day and gaviscon although i dont always give her any because i dont think its making any difference however feel like i cant say i've tried everything if i dont give it to her so she does get it (had it most nights this week apart from last night) she's in her own room, had a few nights last week where she stayed in there all night too, although still with lots of wake ups but she went back down

on the cmpi- we've had a night of vomiting last night and went to the doctors this morning who suggested it could be cows milk thats causing it, shes said to avoid it for a few days then slowly reintroduce to see how she is with it. if this is what it's been all along then it'd make things understandable, she has always looked uncomfortable but i was never convinced of reflux

 

[kumber]

Cow's milk can take up to 6 weeks to leave the system so a few days won't make a difference. Her poo can be tested for cmpa/cmpi so request a stool sample. It may also be worth trying ranitidine to make sure it's definitely not reflux. If you do try it, remember to give it 30-60 mins before a meal

 

[beanie5]

oh wow 6 weeks? i presume my doc was just looking to address th epuking rather than any underlying problem. she did mention referring to a cmpi dietician if she does have it, i'll do some research on it

 

[kumber]

You also need to cut out all milk and derivatives of it from your diet as she's ebf so any milk in your diet will pass through your milk.