Sad and need advice

[Someone]

Hi all

I know I shouldn't be doing this but I am posting under a different user name in case people I knwo should happen to be reading my posts and I can't risk this being seen by anyone. My apologies but this is likely to be a long one.

I am so confused at the moment and I don't know what to do but thought that you may be able to help as you've given me so much good advise in the past.
Basically I don't know if I love my husband anymore. We have been together for 5 1/2 years and married for 2 1/2. We have 2 lovely children and the youngest is 6 months old but I don't know what I feel anymore. My husband is lovely but can be hard work at times. I feel like i'm just a mum to three kids now and i'm not my own person. I don't feel like he wants me anymore even though he still tries to hug and kiss me and stuff but I feel like I now don't want him to.

I don't know if this is since having our youngest but I feel like I want my own space now. Since being 14 years old i've constantly gone from being in one relationship to another and i've never actually been on my own and been independent. And when we did get together we were engaged after 4 months, bought a house after 8 months, pregnant after 9 months, thn had our first child, then got married, then planned our next baby and moved house. Then baby was born and now there is nothing 'round the corner' if you understand what I mean? I just don't know what I want and what is fair on my husband and children and I feel like a complete bitch saying all this and even thinking about it. As far as i'm aware, my husband hasn't a clue that i'm feeling this way.

Has anyon else felt like this because its doing my head in and making me feel so bad.

 

[Urchin]

Awww sorry to hear this. Have you thought about marriage guidance? It's very common to have thoughts like this. You could maybe try Relate?

 

[Someone]

But how do I even bring the subject up with my husband? I really don't think he know's there is a problem. I don't know if its just me and i'm being selfish and wanting what I can't have. I feel stupid like I rushed into everything and now I regret it but it will cause so much hurt to everyone if I try to do anything about it.

 

[tuck]

Maybe you've got a touch of post natal depression?, I suggest that you see your doctor and I'm sure that if you wanted to go somewhere like relate then you could go on your own to start with.

Maybe you need to do something for yourself and I know this sounds naff but an evening class or a gym or theatre group? just something where you can be you and not just a wife or mother.

I really hope that you work things out.

 

[glitzyglamgirl]

Maybe you need to do something for yourself and I know this sounds naff but an evening class or a gym or theatre group? just something where you can be you and not just a wife or mother.

I was going to suggest this too, it will give you some space from hubby and kids and allow you to be yourself, you might find it also gives you and hubby something else to talk about other than just normal day to day things?

A change is as good as a rest, as they say!

Good luck and hope you find some kind of resolution xxx