Rant Friend pregnant by married man on purpose!

[Miss.Monroe]

im so f**king angry. shes just come online to say shes pregnant! i swear to god she a moron!

she wouldnt admit that it was planned at first saying she was antibiotics then decided to admit she just stopped taking it but didnt think she would get pregnant because she was fat. WTF!

i said me and dean havent stopped arguing since me being pregnant about where to live etc, becuase its to so much presssure and were together and love each other!

if she thinks were going to be buddies and bring up our kids together i just dont think i can. i dont want to be a bad friend. but its hard, when she thinks this will make him stay with her, i thought she was better than this, she lives at home with her parents and works two jobs and is always skint.

i cant forgive what shes done, that poor child, to me this is a selfish reason to have a child and shes going to be all alone with this baby.

all she has to say for herself is well ill cope i have to!

argh what can you do with people like that!

 

[dannii87]

I'm shocked and confused?!

She's pregnant by your married man? xx

 

[poppy160]

I think it's supposed to say 'By Married Man.'

I can't stand people who do that, but just because she lives at home and works 2 jobs it doesn't mean she won't be a good Mum? You never know, she may surprise you. But I feel sorry for the bloke she has basically trapped..that's so wrong

 

[Miss.Monroe]

no no no sorry i was so angry i was typing fast, her fella she was seeing whos married with a 6 year old son already. and now shes having his baby and he doesnt know yet, and she thinks it will all be fine and dandy! after shes seen me in floods of tears over my sitauation and im still with the dad of the baby!

 

[Miss.Monroe]

I think it's supposed to say 'By Married Man.'

I can't stand people who do that, but just because she lives at home and works 2 jobs it doesn't mean she won't be a good Mum? You never know, she may surprise you. But I feel sorry for the bloke she has basically trapped..that's so wrong

honestly shes so immature, we hardly see her anymore, she lives at home with 4 sisters and a brother all younger than her, and when i go over i am shocked at how immature she is. she doesnt bother washing for days and we have tried to approach the issue with her. she has no cleanliness, her bedroom is a tip she eats take aways and junk food about 4 times a week and she smokes.

 

[NickyB]

I think it's supposed to say 'By Married Man.'

I can't stand people who do that, but just because she lives at home and works 2 jobs it doesn't mean she won't be a good Mum? You never know, she may surprise you. But I feel sorry for the bloke she has basically trapped..that's so wrong

I feel sorry for his wife and son

 

[dannii87]

Oh no... Well, he should have been careful too so he's partly to blame on this one.

Like NickyB said, I feel for his wife and son, this could break them

I know how you feel though babe, totally, 2 girls at work (both 18) admittedly, one is very mature and has been with her OH for 2 and a half years, but the other is 18 and seriously, probably has the mental age of about 13/14? Anyway, they are both trying although said they're not.

They say things like "oh my boobs are sooooore" and when they get no response they say "and I'm a week late - f*ck - hope I'm not pregnant!!"

I think, if you are trying, just say so! Neither of them have noted the trauma I've been through, they just see cute ickle babies and happy days out at the park in the summer.

At the end of the day, there's nothing we can do about it These people just don't think of consequences xxx

 

[Miss.Monroe]

i think she thinks its going to make us closer, when really im so angry with her, because of her situation and she really hasnt got a clue what shes let herself in for.

i feel kinda helpless, but it feels like she will be wanting alot of help and support from me. ive told her not to expect the fella to stick around incase he doesnt. shes got to realise i wont be there for her 24/7 i have my own family to think about and care for. she needs to grown up now and fast!

ive lived indipendantly for a year ive had my earnings going on household bills, i can budget and go without when i have to. everything she earns is hers and she is still always in debt.

 

[DaisyRose]

Hi,

What a nightmare woman - it's the children I feel sorry for!!!

A friend of mine's marriage has recently broken down because her husband got another woman pregnant (as far as I know he left my friend for this woman). Thing is, my friend and this guy have a 6 year old son, and I know they'd been trying a long while for another! It just isn't right!

 

[Minime]

I think it's supposed to say 'By Married Man.'

I can't stand people who do that, but just because she lives at home and works 2 jobs it doesn't mean she won't be a good Mum? You never know, she may surprise you. But I feel sorry for the bloke she has basically trapped..that's so wrong

Sorry but I have NO SYMPATHY for him whatsoever. He shouldn't be dipping his wick in the first place
(One of my HUGE pet hates)

A friend of mine many years ago was seeing a married man and waited 3 years for him to leave his wife. She deliberately got pregnant and had his son and yes he left his wife - and moved in with ANOTHER woman. My mate was so shocked! He was a wealthy guy too but she's never received a penny for her boy and doesn't pursue it now either as she learnt a very hard lesson.

 

[andreaaa]

Your "friend" sounds extememly immature. What a horrible situation!

I cannot stand affairs, they ruin lives. What a ******* he is too to be sleeping with someone else in the first place. He has a son to think about. idiot.

 

[MissSara]

Well it sounds like she is silly and immature and this man is a dick for cheating on his wife in the first place especially when he has a child.

My friend also was deluded by a married man, thinking he would leave his wife and be happy with her, in fact now she struggles on benefits on her own in a run down house and he hasn't even been near the baby, his wife phones up sometimes to ask about it, but really thats just to make sure that shes planning on keeping the baby away from her and his family!!!!

Your friend will learn the hard way and if your there or not, she will realise in time what a stupid pathetic girl she has been.

 

[lfc_sarah]

People seeing married men with never learn....

Yes the man is in the wrong for cheating, but only rarely does a married man!!...
leave their wife for a "bit of fun" that theyve been having.
The fact that this man has a child already would make him move further away from your friend rather then closer to her...

Did she get pregnant on purpose?
It makes me think she did so that he would leave his wife and be with her...

He'll probaly be too scared of his wife finding out about the affair/child.
Probaly unlikly to offer support because his wife will wonder where his money is going to.
Is she keeping the baby?

Not only is it a bad situation to get pregnant, she doesnt seem ready anyway.

 

[Miss.Monroe]

i thought i knew her, we have been friends for 9 years!

i dont know if she thought she was missing out because i was pregnant or what? but ive hardly seen here this year, and she seems infatuated with this guy.

i am really disapointed in her, shes seen the stress im going through and me and dean are together. shes a complete idiot, i dont know if i can talk to her or forgive her for what shes done.

 

[clairedoran]

It would kill me if dh ever did this to me, but I'd blame him though 100% as he's the one who said the vows to me not the bit on the side. Sometimes its all too easy to blame the girl. Hopefully your friend will be a great mum with or without the dad around. She's in a bad situation, and its easy to say it's her own fault. But I bet if ever she needed a friend its now. However, your right to be honest, if this girl has disappointed you, you should probably avoid her because it will probably stress you out which is the last thing you need when your pregnant! Some friends you just grow out of and seems like you have outgrown her and matured xxxx

 

[fuffins1981]

In my opinion, the fact that she is pregnant will make him run off. The baby will simply represent evidence of his affair. He will most likely want to put as much distance between himself and the 'evidence' as possible.

Hopefully, your friend will be strong enough to cope with both failing to keep him and having a baby. It makes some people mature mighty fast. If she doesn't cope....well then I feel sorry for the child.

Not many men have been with someone because of a child. It is only Mills and Boon where they get down on one knee when they arw overcome with the odea of being a father lol

 

[Sydneysmum]

OMG! What a monumentally stupid thing to do - but there again people do silly things when they're 'in love'.

A slightly different angle - my Dad went off with a woman 19 years his junior when I was 9 as she 'trapped' him with a pregnancy - my little brother is now in his early twenties.

Thankfully, after all this time my parents are now freinds again, they've both had more children by their second marriages and the woman who my Dad went off with kicked him out a few years ago and I took him in. Dad's now married for a third time to a wonderful woman who I think the world of so things seem to have sorted themselves out.

I never felt resentful of my siblings even though they had more of my Dad than I did, I love them unconditionally but I did have a very accute fear of abandonment until my Dad came back to live with me when I was grown up.

Both this silly girl and her irresponsible married man have no idea how much they will be hurting their children.

 

[DaisyRose]

What do you do with mates like that??? Unfortunately Sydney's Mum is right, it's the kids who suffer the most!!! It's hard not to feel a bit sorry for the lady though - she's landed herself one hell of a situation, that's for sure! And she's right, she'll have to cope (it'll almost certainly make her grow up a fair bit).

I walked away from a friend some years ago because she was doing really stupid things, and really stressing me out when I had problems of my own! She was seeing her married boss who was 30 years her senior, and THANK GOD she didn't become pregnant but I had her phoning me up and telling me he'd removed his condom at the last minute without telling her; that he'd taken both my friend and his wife out to dinner together and the wife had been in tears. The guy obviously had no respect for either of them whatsoever but she just continued seeing him!!! And then her rather posh parents found out and all hell let loose!!! I'd just broken up with the love of my life, was on antidepressants and was trying to complete a full time MA, it sounds incredibly selfish, and we'd been friends several years but I was forever running about after her and listening to all her problems - it was so one-sided, and at that time I just couldn't handle it! I did feel very bad indeed! We are in contact again now 10 years down the line but she's moved out of the area and we have very different lives now!

So anyway, it doesn't sound like you need any more stress right now so maybe a bit of distance, at least for a while, may be a good idea. It is an awful situation for those involved but they've got to sort it out amongst themselves.

Take care,

 

[Laura Swain]

The man sounds like such a player. What an idiot. I hope that your friend will not be too upset when this all goes awry. Well, it already is I suppose.

I think it's so bad for the wife - I canÄt imagine the humiliation she will feel when she finds out and it all gets out. I have done silly things in the past so I can't judge but you have to be realistic about these things!

lau x