Pregnant..Old...and Scared.Advice needed please

Discussion in 'First Trimester' started by scarlett1965, Jan 9, 2008.

  1. scarlett1965

    scarlett1965 Well-Known Member

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    Hi Everyone
    Firstly Congrats to you all that have got BFP'S.
    I am 42 yrs old and have found out I am 5 weeks pregnant (after 7 pregnancy tests! and 8 months of trying) I went to see my GP yesterday who has booked me in to see midwife next week so I can have an early scan at 7 weeks. My pregnancy history is long. I have a daughter aged 20 who is 21 weeks pregnant herself, so I am about to be a Granny! ( Jeremy Kyle here we come!) I also have a son aged 16 yrs. I then had 2 m/c but got pregnant with twins in 03 but lost one at 8 weeks, however Lilli survived, now aged 4. I then had a silent miscarriage in Nov 2005 at 8 weeks and an ectopic pregnancy in Nov 2006.
    My GP was so negative yesterday and said that this would probably end with a m/c. After feeling so happy about the BFP I was gutted. Of course I knew this but he didnt have to be that insensitive. I am now petrified and have read from another forum that women with the same history as me keep doing different levels of hcg HPT's every 2 days to see if thier levels have doubled to what they should. ( ie: start with 25 miU, then to 50miU, then 100 mIU and so on.) We are not on a brilliant income so this could be expensive but if it would work and I kept getting BFP'S then it would at least reassure me it might not be an ectopic again.
    Honestly, do any of you think this is a good idea? I know I am being paranoid but, like all of you, I want this last baby so much
    Thanks
    Scarlett :?
     
  2. NickyB

    NickyB Well-Known Member

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    I think the only way you can manage is to ignore the doctor and make sure you remain positive. What a terrible thing to say to a pregnant lady, as if you wont worry enough with your history, without him having to say that.

    Fingers crossed for you.
     
  3. lauramumof2

    lauramumof2 Well-Known Member

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    You can only hope sweetie, just keep your chin up and ignore the silly doc.

    Welcome to first tri :D
     
  4. debecca

    debecca Well-Known Member

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    I would totally ignore the insensitive t*sser if I were you.

    Relax if you can - I wish you the best of luck for your pregnancy xxx
     
  5. reallyoldmum

    reallyoldmum Well-Known Member

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    Scarlett your doctor needs shooting - I have just suffered a very nasty ectopic (long story) myself and in fact only today I went to see my GP to talk about how frightened I would be next time - he assured me following any ectopic they would do beta blood tests every couple of days to ensure doubling of hcg in the early days - they would also scan at 5-6 weeks. Now my GP is currently a little worried as I am sure I have a claim against them but my consultant has assured me the same so I think it is policy around here to manage anyone with previous ectopics this way.

    Make an appointment with another doctor in the practice if you can and talk to them or perhaps your area has an epas unit? Ring them directly and explain you have had a previous ectopic and are worried.

    If you ever want to pm feel free but otherwise enjoy your next 8 months x x x x x x

    PS I'm an old mum too!!
     
  6. scarlett1965

    scarlett1965 Well-Known Member

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    Thanks for your replies. Reallyoldmum, I am sorry for your loss: it really is a horrible experience. I did ask my GP if he could check my bloods to see if they were doubling and he said " no point, if its going to happen it will and any ectopic signs will not show up til your about 8-9 weeks"!(Insensitive pig). He also said I can not have a scan til I am 7 weeks as there would be no heartbeat to see and I would worry.(probably true).
    I am seeing my midwife at 6 weeks so will speak to her.
    Should I keep doing more tests?
    Love Scarlett :?
     
  7. trixiehunnybun

    trixiehunnybun Well-Known Member

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    Congrats first of all! What a mean doctor!! Just thought id say you can buy really cheap pregnancy tests on ebay, bout 2.50 for 10 and they do work. My sister in laws midwife says that where she buys them. Thats if u wanted to keep doing them, Just stay positive and ignore your silly doctor.Keep us posted xxx
     
  8. Bee

    Bee Well-Known Member

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    Congrats hunny!

    Could u maybe go see another doctor? He sounds like a twat to me

    All the best
     
  9. mandspice

    mandspice Well-Known Member

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    Congrats and ignore your doctor, what a prick!!

    I'm not too sure about checking your HCG levels, it may lead to stress and paranoia....I know it's hard but I would probably try and sit tight and wait for the scan. You have every chance and there's no medical reason why this baby shouldn't stick! xxx
     
  10. reallyoldmum

    reallyoldmum Well-Known Member

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    Scarlett this makes me so mad - your doctor is misinformed - I have just had very lengthy conversations with both my GP and Consultant and they both said it can be a very important sign for ectopic how your hcg is doubling - also most ectopics start to show signs from 6 weeks!!! OK you wouldnt necessarily see a heartbeat but a scan would show them where the fetal sac was in an early scan - I had a pregnancy scare just this week - during my signoff with the consultant (hcg going from under 1 upto 5 at 10 dpo) and she did a repeat beta and said they would get me in for a scan if the hcg had risen yesterday - I would have been just over 4 weeks!!!

    Ring your EPAS or EPU and see if you can speak to someone there - I have my consultants mobile number to ring if and when I ever think I am pregnant again!!!

    GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR GP's make me so mad!!!!!!
     
  11. muppetmummy

    muppetmummy Well-Known Member

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    :hug: :hug: :hug: Your doctor sounds so insensitive. I hope everything works out for you
     
  12. kazlin

    kazlin Well-Known Member

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    Some doctors can be really insensitive, just try to ignore him and try not to let it fester in your mind.

    I too will be an older mum, 39 when Daniel is born and to be honest to begin with I had doubts if I would go full term (too much info on the net) etc...but apart from the usual pregnancy symptoms, everythings happening as it should be.

    I did have a very early scan when I found out, around 4 weeks when Dan looked just like a little polo mint (egg sac) as I was experiencing pains on my left side, but everything was fine. I did however have a couple of blood tests to see if my levels were doubling, so they did take good care of me in the very early stages.

    Hun, it's your right to have the best possible care, you can refuse to see a certain doctor, I have before.

    Please try not to worry and best of luck with your pregnancy :D
     
  13. Rosebay

    Rosebay Well-Known Member

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    I don't have any experience or advice to offer except to change your DR as you really don't want him messing with your head. How unprofessional! Outrageous. I have suffered at the hands of rubbish GPs myself and now will only see two Drs at my surgery as the other two are not worth seeing.

    Huge hugs :hug: :hug:
    +++
     
  14. Mildly

    Mildly Well-Known Member

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    Congrats on your BFP :cheer:

    I'm sorry your doctor is being so insensitive :hug:
     
  15. DebbieM

    DebbieM Well-Known Member

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    Firstly and most importantly, congratulations on your pregnancy! Be happy and positive!

    Secondly, doctors can be such arseholes sometimes. Take what they say with a pinch of salt. They don't know everything and every case is different!
     
  16. Tadpole

    Tadpole Well-Known Member

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    Hiya,

    Congrats on your preganancy. I just wanted to say that you don't have to see the same one you are registered with, you can request to see someone else. I used to work in a doctors surgery and unfortunately some of them are VERY arrogant. Don't be afraid to see someone else or even try to register with another surgery if there is another one in the area.

    :hug:
     
  17. Steelgoddess

    Steelgoddess Well-Known Member

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    I feel thats really insensitvie what the doc said to you :(

    Sometimes a bit of hope is all we need!

    Best of luck with your pregnancy!!

    We're here to support one another no matter how young or old...

    xx

    :hug:
     

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