OH's and your appointments

[tipper]

Hi Ladies

I'm just curious how many of you bring your OHs to your dr. appointments? My hubby was asking awhile back if he should be coming with me. I do wish he came along to my 8 week appt as I was given SO much information, but I didn't want him there as I knew they would be doing an internal scan....and that would have been too weird for me to have him there!

I'd really like to take him along to my 12 week appointment, as i think that would help him feel part of this whole process, but I'm once again worried about having an internal ultrasound! Do they typically stop the exams/internal scans by this point?

 

[bethx]

My husbands been to all my appointments we only arrange them for when hes able to attend.. I've never had to have an internal though thankfully but even so if they put a sheet over your legs he couldnt see what hey were doing so maybe not so weird?? I think Ohs should defo come, theres not much they can really get involved in other than that.

 

[flexilexi394]

Mine comes to all mine, and all scans xx

 

[Roo3]

My OH is coming to all my appointments where he can. For my first internal scan, my dad was there! He left the room whilst I got ready and I had a sheet over me so he couldn't see anything. Saying that, it was a bit weird but I didn't want to be on my own incase there was a problem.
I've since had 2 more internal scans and OH has been there. Got another scan tomorrow and OH will be there for that too.

 

[tipper]

Thank you all for the quick replies! I guess I should realize that all modesty gets thrown out the window while you're pregnant, and it would mean so much to involve the husband in this. Not like he hasn't seen everything before anyway.

 

[amandapanda]

My OH didnt come to my first scan and I definitely feel he missed out - he says it still doesn't seem real to him and my retort is 'that's because you didn't come to the scan and see the baby moving about'. As for internal procedure - I would VERY much doubt you'll have that now, they normally do them in very early pregnancy only so it's easier to see the baby, but by 12 weeks a normal ultrasound is the norm xx

 

[tipper]

I think another (irrational) concern of mine is that they won't be able to find anything at the 12 week appointment, and then having to see the disappointment in his face would be awful. I haven't had any spotting/cramping/anything, and I'm still having my usual pregnancy symptoms...but I can't shake that thought from my mind. Gotta love the amount of worry that we all seem to have while pregnant.

 

[amandapanda]

I think we all had that fear Tipper....I really was worried that it was a 'phantom pregnancy' or something because I'd had hardly any symptoms. The first thing I said to the sonographer was 'I'm worried you're going to tell me there is nothing in there!!' but straight away she said 'I can hear a good heartbeat' and all my worries went out the window! Of course bad stuff can be discovered at scans...but all the more reason to have your OH there with you - I do think he should be there if at all possible, it'll help him bond more with the baby and make it feel more real.

 

[xshauna_bazx]

My OH will be coming to all of mine. My first one OH and my mam came in the room. Some of my family will be coming to my scans too i really want my mam there as we are really close xxx

 

[mumofmany]

My hubby couldn't get the time off for my booking in appointment and 1st official scan, neither did he make it to the scan i had with pains when i found out i had a twin that had not made it, or infact my midwife appointments yet, but he has been there for all the others and to be honest i told him we needed the money more. I never worried about him being at an internal scan as he's been to many of them and someone is rigt when they say all dignity out the window, I made my hubby look at me down below when i was bleeding because they kept asking me questions what colour what context how much, and i kept saying i dont know so i got hubby to answer the questions instead, then with my last baby he nearly delivered him so modesty all away. I think it does help thenm seeing the scans though

 

[ruthiestar]

I had an internal scan the first time, as I was unsure of the dates and was only 9 weeks gone! My OH was really upset to have missed it, as it wasn't planned but he has already booked the day off for the 12 week scan! He's really supportive and doesn't want to miss a thing!

 

[lealea85]

Hiya, yep my other half comes to all my appointments. The one I have today at 3pm will be the first one he hasn't been too.
It's good to have ur OH involved. He can't feel what u feel but this is a good way for him/her to show support and for him/her to be involved in the pregnancy

 

[Miss]

We are planning for OH to come to all appointments with me as some people have pointed out in other posts further up it's hard for your OH to be involved. Later they will feel baby kicking etc but in the very early stages it's not really real to them and they cannot bond like we do - they do not feel our body changes etc.

As for feeling weird about him being at the internal scan - are you planning on having him at the birth? Because I can guarentee he will see everything then lol All modesty goes out of the window during birth ladies and you will be too busy to notice let alone get embarrased lol

As for internal scans in general they only do them when they baby is too small to pick up propperly on a tummy scan i.e. in the early weeks of pregnancy so that they can get closer to the baby to see them. x

 

[ruthiestar]

Hiya, yep my other half comes to all my appointments. The one I have today at 3pm will be the first one he hasn't been too.
It's good to have ur OH involved. He can't feel what u feel but this is a good way for him/her to show support and for him/her to be involved in the pregnancy

Good luck! Hope it all goes well. Let us know how you get on

 

[xx emma xx]

I had an emergency scan at 7 weeks andmy OH came with me. My scan wasnt internal though. At one point though the doctor had to check me internally for blood, my OH just left the room for that part as he knew i would feel uncomfortable. He will be with me for my scans but other than that i will probably go myself as he will most likely have to work x

 

[ButterflySkye]

Think, hes going to see everything when you go to give birth, an internal scan is nothing! you wouldnt have an internal one at 12 weeks. My OH has come to everything xxx

 

[lea554]

Just to prepare you then!
I had an internal at my 12 week scan, as baby was moving around too much, and wasnt in the correct position to get the measurement at the back of the neck. Hubby was with me, and I think we were both a bit shocked at first, especially when they pulled out the instrument! But you have a sheet over you, and you get a completly different view of what babys up to, lol! It still didnt work, so had to go back a week later, and had normal ultrasound, and it was fine.
Good luck x

 

[tipper]

You are all very wise! I talked to my hubby last night about this, and he is now going to come along with me to my appointment this month. I don't know if he'll be able to attend all of them, but at least now he knows he has the option to if he wants/can manage.

And regarding delivery, we have already had SO many talks about this! At this point he has informed me that he is 100% alright with being confined to my waist and higher. He's worried about being sick and passing out. Men!

Lastly, Lea - thank you for the warning. I guess for this appointment I'll have to expect the worst (the internal) and hope for the best

 

[amandapanda]

Lea, I think that's unusual for them to do an internal scan to get the nuchal fold measurement - my baby was in the wrong position for it to be measured and they just said it couldn't be done and I'd have to just have the blood test later. x

 

[cherelle]

yeah i think its important to involve your OH as much as possible, plus its nice to have the support! I would be gutted if my OH missed one of my appointments x