New guidelines & insensitive care

[Lozzaste]

Apologies I haven't replied - this is what I've been doing... Having my recurrent mc tests. Eight blood tests! Didn't hurt. Physically anyway.
Luckily it wasn't in the bloody ante natal department today! I did get a call telling me I needed a scan (I called my doc after my "BFP" on Fri saying I might be preg) I had to say that actually, I got a BFN the next day and then AF Oh well. Maybe we will get answers.
Hubby had to have blood taken too! Haha! It's always me who is poked and prodded, in YO FACE hubby
I saw something in the hospital this morning though, it was a complaint procedure, so I wrote it down. I'm initially going to start with that...
Then I'm going to put this nationally. We don't deserve to be put in a too with happy people when our hearts are breaking x x x

 

[Lozzaste]

*in a room, not a "too" - I'm going to stop posting on my iPad! I can spell! X

 

[Harpy]

Blimey, that is a lot of blood!

Hope you get some anwers soon - How long do you have to wait?

I was thinking the hosptial you/I were at would be a good place to start, so will do the same.

 

[Lozzaste]

I've done nothing about this yet.... I will but not feeling great tonight (ill, ugh)
Hope you're ok ladies

When I lost my first pregnancy, in June, five people announced their pregnancies. Three of those babies have been born this week, two more are due. That's hard. I never thought before "that could have been me" until now. I realise it couldn't have been, but now I've had those tests I wonder if there was something I could have done or known? I know that I wouldn't ever have been tested if I had no miscarriage etc.. I think it's knowing there *may* be something wrong and I *could* have changed it. Oh I don't know, I think I'm just having a moment!
I'm so happy for all the people who have had beautiful babies this week, don't get me wrong but I was so looking forward to my Christmas baby. I had no idea back then that it would happen twice! Luckily after my last miscarriage, there were no scan pics popping up on FB so hopefully it won't be as bad. I just wonder why me I suppose xx

 

[Harpy]

I never thought before "that could have been me" until now. I realise it couldn't have been, but now I've had those tests I wonder if there was something I could have done or known? I know that I wouldn't ever have been tested if I had no miscarriage etc.. I think it's knowing there *may* be something wrong and I *could* have changed it. Oh I don't know, I think I'm just having a moment!

A lovely lady on here reminded me of a saying:

"You can't shake a good pregnancy, and you can't keep a bad one" - (I'm sorry I don't remember who it was, but something as simple as that really helped me).

I know thats probably not going to help with how you are feeling right now, its just words, but it really struck home to me when I was going through all the ifs buts and maybes. Even down to not washing grapes! and the more I read the more I beleive it - Especially when it comes down to 'did I do something wrong'.... 'could I have changed it' etc.

Some people smoke and drink and take drugs all through their pregnancies, and they have healthy babies.. some of us do all we can to make sure we are doing the best we can, but we lose ours. Its so so tough.

I hope you get results saying all is well, and you go on to have another healthy baby.. don't forget that is a huge positive, in that you have already proved you can do it, as you have a lovely little bundle already, so you know you have the 'goods' Fingers crossed hun xx

 

[Lozzaste]

You're totally right, I think I was just having a moment. I've been so strong so far, and sometimes it just hits me between the eyes but my rational self knows I could never have changed anything. Silly me

Thanks for the words Harpy, and I like the line about not being able to shake a good one.

When we were at the fetal medicine centre for my little girl, there was a woman outside, heavily pregnant and smoking. It was all I could do not to shake her and ask her how she could be so damn selfish! I mumbled something at her and ran away because she looked hard! Hahahaha x

 

[Harpy]

We are all in the right place on here when we do have our moments, Ive had plenty! lol

Simple words of that saying have really helped!

I know you had a tough journey with your little girl, but just remember, you have done it, and you will do it again, we all just need to find that good unshakable sticky little bean xxx