Need some advice on men..... :S

[ShadowWolf]

My OH has been saying that he feels left out of the whole baby making thing and I'm not sure what to do to make him feel more included. Every time I try to talk to him he turns around and says "yea, but you're not pregnant yet." yet when I do things like research on my own, he complains.

When I undertake to do something new, I like to get as much knowledge under my belt as possible so when he agreed that we could start trying for a LO, I bought a couple of books to read and find out if there was anything I needed to know about making a baby (apart from the obvious!). I'm so glad I bought them as I have learned some important things that I didn't know before hand but he just seems a bit annoyed. I tried reading some of the book out to him when he said all this to me but all he said was "i'll read it myself at some point" which I know full well he wont.

Don't get me wrong, he is a brilliant guy and will make a super father but he is just being a little irritating at the moment, lol. Having just come down off of anti-depressants, it may just be my slightly hormaonal mind imagining things, but I'd still welcome any advice. I want us to every bit of this together as a team.

Wolfy
xx

 

[kazimotto]

i find the best way to deal with that would be to ignore it...you have tried to include him but he is knocking that back so i would just say 'well the books are there if you wanna look or just ask me anything your worried about and we can research it together'. apart from that theres nothing u can do. remember men feel put out by a baby even if they want to be fathers, they still worry about losing your attention to a baby, they know they wont be the centre of your world anymore. its just part of their make up. men need mothered all their lives generally speaking so they get insecure when its time to grow up and be responsible to another human being. my husband is a great father to our two year old, but he still acts like a baby at times and demands attention, all men do it. best thing to do is ignore it, he'll snap out of it. unfortunately for him when you fall pregnant its u who will need all the attention and support, so he will adapt when he is ready. he will be fine, trust me, been there done that....good luck for your bfp...xxx