Mother-in-law rant

[Doob]

Sorry to rant this evening everyone but I'm really upset and don't want to exacerbate the situation.

My husband is really close to his Dad (he lost his Mum suddenly when he was 16) so when we found out we had a bfp he wanted to tell him. I said ok but we're only telling parents with strict instructions not to spread it for a good few weeks yet.

Anyhow his Dad and step-mum were really pleased and everything was going well when his step-mum said 'oh and its such a good sign that everything works, afterall 25% of pregnancies end in miscarriage so it won't be an issue if you need to try again'. I was so shocked I said 'oh yes I guess so'.

Now I know I'm in the very early stages and I know the risks about misscarriage etc. but I was so upset that she said that when we were telling them this special news urgh. Sorry for the rant ladies needed to let it out without upsetting my hubby even more (he wanted to speak to her but I thought it would cause an issue and make things worse).

Thanks xxx

 

[Cyprus08]

aww hun maybe she just wasn't thinking. Perhaps in her mind she was trying to be reassuring??

I remember when I found out I was having my first, we were talking about things we were going to need with my dad and he said he wanted to buy us the pram, "not for a while though just incase you don't end up with it" I know my dad would never say anything to hurt me and I know he really didn't mean it to come out the way it did, he just wasn't thinking before he spoke. Perhaps it was the same in your MIL's case. Hope your feeling better soon xx

 

[leesey]

I think some people are so insensitive when you are telling them your happy news. My granny for example, when I told her she was going to be a great-granny, said "I'm already a great granny it's really not that big a deal" Fair enough, she has two great grandchildren to my uncles children whom were estranged from the family until recently, but come on!! Happy news people, let's leave the negativity out of it!!

Don't worry about statistics, if we did that all the time we'd go mad!! xx

 

[Doob]

Thanks for the replies, families hey!. She does have a tendency to just speak without thinking first! I know she is excited for us but I think it was the statistics that got me upset because I started to think about things over and over where as before I was like yes I'm aware of the risks but I'm going to think positively, will have to go back to thinking like that and stop worrying. xx

 

[jojo3972]

0o0o how very insensitive of her i would have spat me tea at her if my mil wpuld have come out with that tut some ppl need there gobs sewing up,, bless ya xx

 

[hellywelly]

Everytime any of us tell our boss at work we are pregnant she does the whole 'don't get our hopes up' talk. I'm the 4th one to have a baby there and she's done it with every one of us!!! Some people just don't engage brain before opening mouth. xxx

 

[CARNAT22]

Sometimes people just say stupid things...

My B-I-L asked me why I was telling people "so early" (after our 2nd early scan at 9w 5d) as there is still a risk of miscarriage! He knows all about my history but talk about piss on my parade.

xxxxxxxxxx

 

[jen9984]

Aww sounds like she just had a bit of "foot in mouth" syndrome. I'm sure she was trying to be encouraging, in a round about sort of way, and it just came out all wrong!

 

[Loula]

I think they think theyre offering good advice, in hindsight it may be but i dunno we are just sooo overwhelmed x

 

[EssJayPea]

I agree with the others. Sometimes people just don't have the right words at the right time. Don't worry yourself xxx

 

[Doob]

Thank you for all the replies, made me feel a lot better although like others have said on other threads I'm now on nickerwatch! lol xx