**May Mummies**

[Charlotte9]

How far along are you now? I really hope it starts to ease up soon for you soon!

I'm 10+1 today. I've had heartburn for 3 weeks now. My oh is probably bored me talking about heartburn everyday ha ha. Do you think it will get easier around 12 weeks?

 

[SugaryIris]

I hope so, I know sickness can last to 16 weeks for some but after the placenta takes over at 11 weeks I felt so much better x

 

[soffphie]

After midwife today stuff been playing on my mind, mostly about downs syndrome, she said they will do a scan check 12 wks &a small blood test then tell me chances of it being bad/high risk. Depending that i either 1) have a proceedure that can cause miscarriage to test or b) pay £400 for a blood test i mean Jeez. She says nhs cant absorb such a high cost blood test yet they pay a lot more for other stuff but oh well.!

I also had to discuss other baby and i said they were prob downs so does that mean this one is etc.. she said there is no guarantee other one was downs but i dunno. Had to also discuss my mind and stuff that happened August was just v v rough going

What advice have other people had about down syndrom etc testing? What do you guys plan to do?

 

[Countrylife]

PS anyone thought about how to announce?

The town I'm from celebrate Halloween on the last fri of October instead of 31st. So it'll be 5 or 6 days early this year. However I have my scan on 30th so I was thinking on the 31st I'll do diff size pumpkins as my announcement x

Love that idea! I really want to announce mine but I'm really nervous that I'll jinx myself.. also my dad got annoyed when I said I wanted to announce as he doesnt get along with his family and doesnt want them knowing (not that it's about him) my girl and I made a little photo collage when time comes wish she would stop growing up!!
my mums just arrived for a week and brought the carseats and cots I've purchased so we've been busy putting them up.. early days but my girl has no patience! Like me wanting to find out genders hehe

 

[SugaryIris]

My husband is a baker so we did a bun in the oven themed announcement, it went down really well.

I did it the day of our scan so was before our 12 weeks by a few days but I figured the scan was done so it was ok.

 

[SugaryIris]

Love that idea! I really want to announce mine but I'm really nervous that I'll jinx myself.. also my dad got annoyed when I said I wanted to announce as he doesnt get along with his family and doesnt want them knowing (not that it's about him) my girl and I made a little photo collage when time comes wish she would stop growing up!!
my mums just arrived for a week and brought the carseats and cots I've purchased so we've been busy putting them up.. early days but my girl has no patience! Like me wanting to find out genders hehe

View attachment 88647

I love the photo collage! X

 

[Countrylife]

Yo

My husband is a baker so we did a bun in the oven themed announcement, it went down really well.

I did it the day of our scan so was before our 12 weeks by a few days but I figured the scan was done so it was ok.

Love that idea we contemplated that with two buns but wasn't sure if people would get it haha

 

[SugaryIris]

Ladies I’m really struggling.
My sister isn’t speaking to me since I told her I was pregnant a month ago.

I kind of understand, she’s been trying for a baby with her partner for a really long time and had her only free cycle of ivf on the nhs earlier this year which was not successful.

long story short, I told her we were trying for a baby over 2 years ago when we first started trying because I knew of her troubles and wanted her to be able to process it and she told me if I got pregnant before her she’d never speak to me again. I understood she was upset, but she made me cry.

roll on 2 years, she’s heard of my 3 losses, our failed rounds of ovulation induction and she knew we were saving for ivf to start in January. Then we got pregnant, it was our little miracle.

I told her when I was 8 weeks, i wanted to give her time to process before we did a big announcement at 12 weeks. She hasn’t said more than a few words to me, or anyone else in the family since. I told her we had the 12 week scan and I was doing an announcement on social media, I wanted to give her the option of either asking how it went and seeing the scan or avoiding social media if she needed to. She didn’t even respond to me. It broke my heart. She’s my baby’s aunty and she didn’t even ask if it was ok.

every time I talk about the pregnancy my family say ‘how’s your sister?’. Shes made the whole thing about her and She’s making me feel like a lepper and honestly it’s casting a big grey shadow over what should be the happiest time of my life. I shouldn’t be made to feel guilty about being pregnant, especially when I have fought so hard to get here in the first place.

I don’t know what to do.

 

[Countrylife]

Ladies I’m really struggling.
My sister isn’t speaking to me since I told her I was pregnant a month ago.

I kind of understand, she’s been trying for a baby with her partner for a really long time and had her only free cycle of ivf on the nhs earlier this year which was not successful.

long story short, I told her we were trying for a baby over 2 years ago when we first started trying because I knew of her troubles and wanted her to be able to process it and she told me if I got pregnant before her she’d never speak to me again. I understood she was upset, but she made me cry.

roll on 2 years, she’s heard of my 3 losses, our failed rounds of ovulation induction and she knew we were saving for ivf to start in January. Then we got pregnant, it was our little miracle.

I told her when I was 8 weeks, i wanted to give her time to process before we did a big announcement at 12 weeks. She hasn’t said more than a few words to me, or anyone else in the family since. I told her we had the 12 week scan and I was doing an announcement on social media, I wanted to give her the option of either asking how it went and seeing the scan or avoiding social media if she needed to. She didn’t even respond to me. It broke my heart. She’s my baby’s aunty and she didn’t even ask if it was ok.

every time I talk about the pregnancy my family say ‘how’s your sister?’. Shes made the whole thing about her and She’s making me feel like a lepper and honestly it’s casting a big grey shadow over what should be the happiest time of my life. I shouldn’t be made to feel guilty about being pregnant, especially when I have fought so hard to get here in the first place.

I don’t know what to do.

Shes being really petty unfortunately and it's not fair on you! As much as it may hurt to not have her on board right now she will eventually realise what shes doing is wrong, whether she chooses to do something about it or not is a different story...
I've definitely learnt that we cant change the way other people feel or behave, if only we could! I hope you can try your best to enjoy your pregnancy and surround yourself with others that can bring positive vibes rather than negative.
My partner still isnt on board and admitted he still doesnt really want these babies, I talk to him every day but I dont put alot of effort into it anymore as it drags me down and makes me feel hurt, so I'd rather ring my mum and my best friends who give me excitement and make me feel good.
I hope she comes round for your sake but in the meantime I really hope you can keep positive and enjoy it all for you xx

 

[soffphie]

@SugaryIris so sorry to hear about your family, but i agree with countrylife. Its not like youve gone oh opps pregnant, youve tried for a long time!! & deserve to be pregnant as do all us long termers!!

@Countrylife love idea!! I never really got to do this announcement as id dreamed due to what happened with other one in August but it still went good!! Exciting time for you tho

I had my Grandad say to be yesterday "just make sure everything goes ok with this one" and i just felt such a pressure and i was like, how can i stop it tho? I cant! Makes me feel like people like my grandad will blame me if it goes wrong again. 9 weeks today tho! Hurry up 12 weeks & pls pls be ok!!

 

[SugaryIris]

@SugaryIris so sorry to hear about your family, but i agree with countrylife. Its not like youve gone oh opps pregnant, youve tried for a long time!! & deserve to be pregnant as do all us long termers!!

@Countrylife love idea!! I never really got to do this announcement as id dreamed due to what happened with other one in August but it still went good!! Exciting time for you tho

I had my Grandad say to be yesterday "just make sure everything goes ok with this one" and i just felt such a pressure and i was like, how can i stop it tho? I cant! Makes me feel like people like my grandad will blame me if it goes wrong again. 9 weeks today tho! Hurry up 12 weeks & pls pls be ok!!

every week that goes by dramatically improves your chances, 9 weeks already! Won’t be long now until you feel you can relax!

 

[Charlotte9]

Love that idea! I really want to announce mine but I'm really nervous that I'll jinx myself.. also my dad got annoyed when I said I wanted to announce as he doesnt get along with his family and doesnt want them knowing (not that it's about him) my girl and I made a little photo collage when time comes wish she would stop growing up!!
my mums just arrived for a week and brought the carseats and cots I've purchased so we've been busy putting them up.. early days but my girl has no patience! Like me wanting to find out genders hehe

View attachment 88647

Beautiful collage! I made a little poster myself and sent it to my brother and his other half. My mum could not resist and told him before I did. So they already knew. Oh well.

 

[CMcDx]

Love that idea @Countrylife !

 

[Charlotte9]

@SugaryIris
What a nice idea of a bun in the oven! Especially if your hubby is a baker. Fantastic!

Sorry your sister is jealous and not talking to you. It's very hard for her to be happy. But she is your sister and should be very happy for you.

 

[CMcDx]

Ladies I’m really struggling.
My sister isn’t speaking to me since I told her I was pregnant a month ago.

I kind of understand, she’s been trying for a baby with her partner for a really long time and had her only free cycle of ivf on the nhs earlier this year which was not successful.

long story short, I told her we were trying for a baby over 2 years ago when we first started trying because I knew of her troubles and wanted her to be able to process it and she told me if I got pregnant before her she’d never speak to me again. I understood she was upset, but she made me cry.

roll on 2 years, she’s heard of my 3 losses, our failed rounds of ovulation induction and she knew we were saving for ivf to start in January. Then we got pregnant, it was our little miracle.

I told her when I was 8 weeks, i wanted to give her time to process before we did a big announcement at 12 weeks. She hasn’t said more than a few words to me, or anyone else in the family since. I told her we had the 12 week scan and I was doing an announcement on social media, I wanted to give her the option of either asking how it went and seeing the scan or avoiding social media if she needed to. She didn’t even respond to me. It broke my heart. She’s my baby’s aunty and she didn’t even ask if it was ok.

every time I talk about the pregnancy my family say ‘how’s your sister?’. Shes made the whole thing about her and She’s making me feel like a lepper and honestly it’s casting a big grey shadow over what should be the happiest time of my life. I shouldn’t be made to feel guilty about being pregnant, especially when I have fought so hard to get here in the first place.

I don’t know what to do.

Sorry to hear that and not much advice I can offer.

Concentrate on what's best for you and your wee one. Try not to stress to much over it.

Hope you're okay xx

 

[Countrylife]

I've been emotional wreck yesterday and today, my mum has come to stay and what I thought was going to be an enjoyable time has turned out to be absolutely crap. Shes come into my home and giving me her opinion on how I should change the way I parent and how I need to do this and that blah blah and I need to ask my dad for help (my dad would help but he would also give me a huge lecture about letting gardens get on top of me and how I need to do more, then hed expect help back afterward) so I'd rather just do it myself.
My daughter caitlin plays up heaps when my mum is around because she knows mum will defend her and do things for her even when caitlin knows to well that if she wasn't here she'd just have to do her jobs etc. So I've yelled at her and taken her technology away and I'm the bad parent and creating a toxic environment by telling her off etc apparently. I hate to say it as I love my mum but I just wish she would leave! She treats me like a child and I'm never good enough, even though she seems to forget that our relationship was terrible for a long time too.
Sorry I just needed to vent before I tell her to get out of my house!

 

[SugaryIris]

I've been emotional wreck yesterday and today, my mum has come to stay and what I thought was going to be an enjoyable time has turned out to be absolutely crap. Shes come into my home and giving me her opinion on how I should change the way I parent and how I need to do this and that blah blah and I need to ask my dad for help (my dad would help but he would also give me a huge lecture about letting gardens get on top of me and how I need to do more, then hed expect help back afterward) so I'd rather just do it myself.
My daughter caitlin plays up heaps when my mum is around because she knows mum will defend her and do things for her even when caitlin knows to well that if she wasn't here she'd just have to do her jobs etc. So I've yelled at her and taken her technology away and I'm the bad parent and creating a toxic environment by telling her off etc apparently. I hate to say it as I love my mum but I just wish she would leave! She treats me like a child and I'm never good enough, even though she seems to forget that our relationship was terrible for a long time too.
Sorry I just needed to vent before I tell her to get out of my house!

oh gosh, I’m sorry you’re having to go through this, it’s not what you need right now. You parent how you want to xx

 

[Charlotte9]

@Countrylife
Don't let your mum control your life. Tell her you are in charge of your life. And tell her it's upsetting you. My mum knows she can't boss me around cause I'm mum too. Apart from today are you good friends?

 

[Kitana]

I've been emotional wreck yesterday and today, my mum has come to stay and what I thought was going to be an enjoyable time has turned out to be absolutely crap. Shes come into my home and giving me her opinion on how I should change the way I parent and how I need to do this and that blah blah and I need to ask my dad for help (my dad would help but he would also give me a huge lecture about letting gardens get on top of me and how I need to do more, then hed expect help back afterward) so I'd rather just do it myself.
My daughter caitlin plays up heaps when my mum is around because she knows mum will defend her and do things for her even when caitlin knows to well that if she wasn't here she'd just have to do her jobs etc. So I've yelled at her and taken her technology away and I'm the bad parent and creating a toxic environment by telling her off etc apparently. I hate to say it as I love my mum but I just wish she would leave! She treats me like a child and I'm never good enough, even though she seems to forget that our relationship was terrible for a long time too.
Sorry I just needed to vent before I tell her to get out of my house!

I'm sorry you're having such a bad time. I can relate unfortunately! My mother is a very dominant person and needs to voice her opinion about well... everything. When I was pregnant with DD, I spent a week with her at her place and it was hell, I felt like I was 12 years old again! My father then joins in and supports her ludacris mindgames.
With my DD now she can also be very annoying, she will comment how I'm too strict with her or even just say flat out that I am a bad mother. She tells me how she used to let me do whatever I wanted but I remember my parents being very strict, so much so that I would even explain to my ex-husband that I was going to the bathroom when I would stand up. I avoid going on holiday or doing something which might make me spend more than 2 days with her in a row.
The only advice I can give you is to hold on until she leaves.
How long will she be there?x

 

[soffphie]

Ah feel for you guys. I havent had any comments off people yet!!! I am worried about peoples opinions as i do feel very nieve to all things baby, as in i dont really have a clue!! But what ive said to people we are going to do so far no ones argued.

Had a weird morning, woke up normal then felt sick so took usual sickness pills. Hoping to get past sick stuff soon. But i am ok with pills (as bad as that sounds!!) Still v v fussy on food.