Labour and birth

[Laura_James&Amber]

Hi girls Was just wondering really how your all feeling about labour and giving birth? How are you preparing? Are you scared? Do you talk about how your feeling to whoever will be your birthing partner?
I'm probably completely mad but I'm actually feeling quite relaxed about the whole thing! I know it will hurt like nothing I've felt before but I don't see the point in being scared anymore as theres only one way LO is coming out and theres no getting away from it!! I've written my birth plan and its 3 pages long but I'm guessing it will totally go out the window on the day as things like this never go how you'd like them too! I'm also planning to try and do it on just G&A, maybe a bit too ambitious but I don't like the sound of any other pain relief. Pethidine can make you and baby drowsy and although I'm usually ok with needles I don't fancy having one put into my spine so an epidural is a no no! I am open minded though and will see how I cope before ruling anything out! I had a chat with OH about how he is feeling about it and he said he will find it hard because he won't want to see me in so much pain and will be wishing he could take it all away but at the same time he is excited because its our first born who we created together.
So how are you all feeling about the whole experience? Sorry to be so nosy, I'm just very interested to hear everyones views on it

 

[dannii87]

I'm similar!!

I do think you get to a stage in Tri3 where you're so damn close to the event, that you just have no option other than to accept it. I'll be VERY excited at my first few twinges of labour, but then the worry will start and the anxiety will quickly kick in!!

I was petrified at the beginning of my pregnancy, and now I'm amazed at how calm I feel?

Well, I've been thinking more about it lately and have posted in Ask A Mum, because I realised that I have no idea about any pain relief lol

I'm not convinced that you can "prepare" for it. You don't have a clue how it'll happen. What will happen first and in what order etc. I guess just making sure you are practically prepared (like baby's bag, your hospital bag etc) is all you can do really?

Obviously, because I'm planning a hospital birth I don't need to prepare as such. Homebirths need more preparation...

BRING ON THE PAIN TRAIN!! (But quickly leave the station again once it all gets too much pweeeeese )

 

[nickilubs]

Yeh very relaxed! Worryingly so! I haven't really worried at all, its like you say the baby had to come out one way or another so I really haven't panicked or anything. I havent done a birth plan I just know I would like to have her at home.

I guess I will just have a shower and trust my body and the midwifes to tell me what to do. Keep up and about listen to music and take the pain as it comes.

Does anyone else think they will handle the pain well? I think I will be okay with it I know its going to hurt lots but its only once and your a mum forever.

 

[dannii87]

Does anyone else think they will handle the pain well? I think I will be okay with it I know its going to hurt lots but its only once and your a mum forever.

I think it's really easy to say "yeah" to this now, but having never experienced a pain like it, I have no idea!! I'm preparing myself to not handle it very well. Because, with me, I have to prepare myself for the worst case scenerio in EVERYTHING I do. For me, it works best because I can never be shocked with how something goes if that makes sense?!

I just know I'm SH*T when I stub my toe Doesn't bode well for my tolerance of labour huh?!

 

[bunnymom1980]

I was a bit of a wuss when I had my son. Because I was induced, as soon as they broke my waters and started the drip I was begging for an epidural I was terrified as to how painful the contractions would get so quickly my fear of having a needle shoved in my spine went out of the window.

I'm still really queasy about spines so the prospect of having to have one again if I have a section terrifies me but not as much as the thought of having to have a section . So I've got to worry about this at least until wednesday when I have the presentation scan.

My DH is useless as his attitude is if you have to have a section then you have to have a section. I said it's not the point and won't stop me being terrified about it.

So I can't really write a proper birth plan yet which is doing my head in.

 

[Mildly]

I'm feeling quite relaxed about things at the moment which probably means I'll be a quivering mess when the time comes

It has only been over the last couple of days that I have actually really been thinking about the birth aspect of things. I'd really like a water birth at the hospital mostly as people I know have said the water is really good as pain relief. I'm hoping the birth pool will be free when I go into labour but I'm not pinning all my hopes on it, in case it isn't! Pain relief wise, if all goes well and I get the birthing pool and things are straightforward, I would like to be able to give birth in the pool which would mean limiting myself to G&A. If I can't cope though I am prepared for the other methods of pain relief right up to the epidural - really I'm just going to go with the flow and see how I feel on the day.

I just keep thinking to myself that millions of women have babies everyday and if they can do it, then so can I However it still doesn't help that I am a complete wimp who often faints at the sight of blood I'd like to exceed my expectations of myself as far as coping with the pain goes and I would like OH to be proud of me. However that doesn't mean I am going to try to do everything without pain relief, if I feel I need it, I will have it. I just don't want to be freaking out at the pain, I want to make a calm and reasoned decision about what I want and need - if that makes sense

I've made the decision not to write a birth plan as I have no idea what I'll be feeling on the day and there is nothing I definitely want to rule out either.

OH and I haven't really discussed the birth in detail as I figure most of it is my decision as it is happening to me. He does want me to have as few drugs as possible (and he wants to try my G&A) but if it really hurts and I can't cope, he will just have to support my decision. We have discussed that neither I nor him want him going down the business end Although I have told him that if I have a c-section I want the screen removed as they lift Oscar out so I can see as I saw a picture someone posted on here and it looked amazing! I know I'm rubbish with blood but I'll be lying down and therefore won't faint - OH doesn't want to watch that though!

 

[Neev]

I am a little anxious but am also expecting the worst pain ever - this way nothing can shock me - I have even told everyone - my lungs will be in full practice for screaming when the time comes. I have no birth plan, have told MW - give me anything and everything as long as it is administered by the right person at the right amount - so fingers crossed the pain will be something we can cope with...

 

[Hazel]

Feeling quite chilled 8) . Fed up with being pregnant and aching all the time so want it to be over now.

I was present at the birth of my friends son about 9 years ago so I think experiencing it first hand like that probably helps to relax my fears, she's had 3 all on gas and air and said never felt the need to do all the screaming. It really is nothing like you see on tv.

I just think there are drugs there if I need them. Will just go with it.

 

[mum2soon4]

Even though its number 4 i´m a little scared of knowing the unknowing,each one has been different, the 2nd was the best as i was relaxed and determined to stay at home as long as possible, and also it was in year 2000 and before i was due to birth they must have been floods maybe Africa of somewhere and in the news it was about a lady giving birth while the floods were bad stranded up a tree, and all i kept remembering and telling myself if she can do give birth up a tree then i can deal with whatever.I did stay at home with that labour with a tens machine and gave birth with no pain relief as it was too late,which i regretted as it was another ventouse delivery at the end, so when it came to number 3 birth i was terrified I had a epidural early on and layed on the bed shaking terrified they would let it wear off before i give birth that was the probably the best pain free birth but dragged on with having the epidural, so this time i am determined to try and stay upright and at home with the help of the tens machine and see what happens.

I dont have a birth plan and am open minded with what ever happens, at the time the pain is the most ever pain you will prob go through it brings the best rewards ever of your little one, and i´m the one after the first child who said NO MORE!!!

 

[NickyB]

I'm not so much worried about the pain, it's inevitable. But, I'm worried about going into labour in the early hours of the morning, panicking even though I know now I'll have hours or days to go still, but I'm worried I'll work myself up and forget how to count contractions. Or that I won't eat, I'm worried about the stupid little things that'll make me worse!

 

[Sherlock]

Sounds like you are prepared

FWIW if your birth plan is 3 pages long I'd look to condensing it down and bullet pointing it all rather than having overly long and wordy. Your MW won't have time to read it all maybe so if its all on one page and clear and quick to read it is helpful. I did this with mine and it all fitted well onto one single sheet.

And it can happen that your birth plan is something that happens. My labour certainly went the same way as my birth plan. Nothing major but it covered all the things I hoped for and I got them.

 

[jills10uk]

I'm the same - feeling reasonably relaxed about the whole thing. it annoys me when people ask me oh are you nervous - whats the point?? it has to happen and i have to go through it so no point in getting myself too anxious about it.
at this stage im just ready for it to happen!! i get jealous everytime someone else goes into labour!!

my dh thinks i have quite a high pain counter so im going in fairly confident i will be ok and if it all gets too much there are ways to help with the pain.
bring it on!!!!

 

[Penstraze]

I am feeling pretty relaxed about it all I don't see the point in worrying about it wont make it any less painful if anything getting stressed and tense at the time is likely to make it worse (or so midwife says) so I really want to stay as calm through out as possible! I haven't done a birth plan yet I have midwife coming out at the end of august to do it which is abit late really but I can't say Im too bothered about having one I think its rare that things go to plan my only one thing I definately want stuck to is that I want skin to skin straight away or if I can't I want DH to do it I have made this very clear to DH how important this is to me other then that think I will just play it by ear I'd like to try and manage with just gas and air but as I have no idea how its going to feel or how I will feel at the time I just want to keep and open mind so I don't feel ive failed by giving in and not keeping to my birth plan or something if I decide to have an epidural or pethadine etc!

 

[Sherlock]

I'm similar!!

I do think you get to a stage in Tri3 where you're so damn close to the event, that you just have no option other than to accept it. I'll be VERY excited at my first few twinges of labour, but then the worry will start and the anxiety will quickly kick in!!

What midna said You really won't feel worried or anxious. Your body has a natural instinct that kicks in and takes over. And honestly between contractions you feel kind of normal (well I did) and just went about my normal routine for as long as I could till they were too close together to do so easily. By that point you are just focusing on you and the baby and giving birth. Not much else.

 

[Jade&Evie]

you really won't be worried- its the excitement and adrenaline that keeps you going i think!

yes, it hurts but it's a natural pain and your body deals with it. labour for me was almost an out of body experience- like watching someone else doing it i didn't have any pain relief though so that may have been delirium!

don't worry too much about what you have planned- 90% chance your plan will be out the window by 4cm! good luck girls xxxx

 

[MissyRee]

I could have written this post lauranjamesnbaby!! I too want to do it on G&A alone if possible and i seem to have quite a relaxed attitude towards labour as it is inevitable, i do not want an epidural either as the thought of it going into my spine is just and i want to feel my legs and be able to get up and walk around the room etc still!
Its weird cos i know its gonna hurt soo much but i feel like i'll be able to deal with it somehow, i mean people have been having children for centuries.. surely people wouldnt keep having them if it was THAT awful!
I havent written my birth plan yet not sure what to put really.. sounds like your very prepared with 3pages though! x

 

[Laura_James&Amber]

Thankyou for all your input girls
Its really interesting to hear how your all feeling about the experience and its nice to hear that so many are not panicking or scared (I thought I was weird because I feel so relaxed!!)
Thanks also to the already - mums, its good to hear from people who have already experienced it
But I'm thinking my birth plan is a bit extreme!! Will have a re-think and shorten it!

 

[Mrs_Jay]

Im feeling okay about labour, i think its coz ive already done it once, coz with jack i was TERRIFIED. But in my honest opinion it was no where near as bad as i had imagined it up to be. So im hoping this time will be the same

 

[Redshoes]

I'm looking forward to it, hoping she doesn't start early though, and just hoping that I get to do things naturally and fully experience them this time, and that it's not too quick, most of all hoping baby and I are well and happy at the end of it