scared!

[little momma]

feeling a bit scared...
about labour. i know i've got a while... and in many ways i want my baby NOW... but im also getting really scared of the idea of labour.
everyone just keeps telling me how painful it is... and how awful and stuff...
and i'm just getting really really really scared. my friend said it's the closest i'll ever come to death. which i dont really get... like surely... when i die thats closer? and i dont see how you can be "close to death".
i'm just really scared of the pain... and the whole ordeal and scaryness of it all.
is it really as bad as everyone says? how can i make it better? why does it have to be so horrid? why can't a stalk just deliver the baby?
i'm scared...
xxx

 

[MissSara]

Yeah this is my 2nd and i guess knowing what to expect i shouldn't be scared but i think because every labour is different its the whole idea of not knowing what is going to happen that is the scary part.

This is how i see it, if labour was really really that bad and "close to death" do you think i would be mad enough to go through it all again?? or everyone else on here who has more than one child.
I'm not going to say there is no pain but once you have your baby in your arms, trust me i would have done it all again in a second.

 

[sarah2807]

Awww-try not to worry too much. You don't want to spent the rest of your pregnancy being stressed about it...just think you'll have to go through it whatever and like miss sara said women do it all the time and then often chose to do it again-so it must be worth it!!!

 

[little momma]

that's true... i guess maybe it's a bit like a roller coaster... you go "noooo i dont wanna go on" but then you do and your like "yay that was cool"
except not...
no, not really... bad analagy...
i keep thinking that at least it has an end... not like an operation where you hurt for ages after...
well, obviously your not THAT comfy after lol... but it's not like having a liver transplant...
i spose...

 

[Lisamj]

Hmm, insensitive friend I think - even if she didn't mean it how it sounds. You know you'll be fine. It's what our bodies were built for.

xxxx

 

[DebbieM]

I felt exactly the same as you do now throughout my entire pregnancy and even before I was pregnant! I never actually wanted to get pregnant at one point because I never thought I would be able to handle the pain and it scared me so much!

All throughout my pregnancy I was terrified that I wouldn't cope and that the actual birth would be horrendous and I was convinced that I would need every type of pain relief available... that wasn't the case though.

I won't lie to you and say it doesn't hurt. It does. You have to be realistic and accept that pushing something the size of a small melon out of a pretty small hole is going to cause some pain, right? BUT..... it's a pain that you CAN deal with and you WILL deal with once everything gets going.

I was in early labour for days and wore a TENS machine the whole time. Once I got to the hospital the contractions were pretty unbearable and I couldn't even put both feet on the floor at the same time OR it down!!! Once checked, I was 6cm by this point though (everything went pretty fast for me) and I coped through the entire thing on just TENS, entinox (VERY GOOD STUFF) and a Meptid injection (which to be honest I don't know for sure that even did anything as it's more of a relaxant and I was pretty high on the entinox!).

My advice to you would be....

1. Get yourself a TENS machine if you haven't already. You can use it during contractions and I found mine to be a real help. It got me to 6cm without anything else! I recommend the Babycare Elle Tens. It was fantastic!

http://www.expressyourselfmums.co.uk/de ... Qwodh3Lwww

2. Don't think about it too much until you need to. You will drive yourself mad worrying about how much it will hurt and if you will be able to cope and what if things go wrong. They won't and you will be fine! Trust me!

3. Accept that there will be some degree of pain but it won't be as bad as you're imagining. The worst part is when the baby s crowning. It stings like mad but like everyone says, you forget the pain as soon as you are holding your baby.

As for the whole "near death" feeling. Rubbish! Don't listen to people telling you such silly things. I never once felt like I was going to die!

Good luck to you for when it does happen and I am sure you will be absolutely fine and you will be amazing!

 

[DebbieM]

PS. I'd do it again in a heartbeat and certainly plan to so it can't be THAT bad!

 

[cherylcusack]

This is my fourth pregnancy and it's more the unknowing that scares me more than the pain. As each labour is different. I'm a wimp when it comes to pain but i go with the flow of it and choose pain relief that i feel i need at the time. Each labour i've used a different pain relief. Try and keep an open mind and believe in your body to help with the pain.

 

[Geordie&Bairn]

I second Debbie saying get a Ten machine im in love with mine helps the back ache soooooooooo much


Take no notice of your friends unhelpful comments yes labour will hurt and yeah i admit to being a bit scared but also very excited.
And most of the ladies on here who have popped say as soon as thier baby is born the pain fades away physical and mentaly
its just so worth all the discomfort and pain to have our little ones with us
So you'l be fine hun

 

[Suzie and Faith]

I think the unknown of it all makes it scary - even for those who've given birth before. No one can explain exactly how one labour will feel.

But i've had every assurance that the memories of the pain fade and that it all becomes worth it when baby is born.

It's definitely natural to worry! But try and avoid letting people tell you horror stories and things about their own births. And as already has been said - women have been doing it for billions of years and a lot of them more than once!!