'is breast best'

[knopk@]

For me it wasnt really the posters, I am just that sort of person that does absolutely everything to achieve something. I dont like failing but I had to admit defeat as it was about my son and not me.

There definitely has to be more support for mums available. Funnily enough I helped my friend with the latch as HVs were useless, she was able to excusively BF but she didnt have supply problems, just latching

 

[Mrs Wibbily]

I never realised having a c-sec is also seen as failing! Blimey!

Just my own failure, not a reflection of how I see other people's c sections. For this baby I would quite happily have a c section. I was adamant throughout my first pregnancy and very naive that I wouldn't need a section as my body was designed for labour and birth or so I thought. After going through what i went through (I know women go through a lot worse) and being so poorly afterwards, the struggle i had with breastfeeding felt like a mountain I had to climb to be able make myself feel like I'd achieved something.

Please do not see this comment as a comment relating to all c-sections.xx

 

[SunnyGirl]

Ah Domperidone... I was told by the BF specialist on the ward I was to be considered for that (after four days of no success bf) and she KEPT saying she'd only had one other mummy have to have it in her 20 years' experience. How much of a weirdo did that make me feel?! Then I never even got it!!

We were forced to buy an electric pump before they'd discharge us. Ugh.


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[Emily0505]

Ah Domperidone... I was told by the BF specialist on the ward I was to be considered for that (after four days of no success bf) and she KEPT saying she'd only had one other mummy have to have it in her 20 years' experience. How much of a weirdo did that make me feel?! Then I never even got it!!

We were forced to buy an electric pump before they'd discharge us. Ugh.


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I was put on domperidone. My gp had to prescribe it for me, but i knew more about it than she did as she'd never prescribed it before!! Didnt make the blindest bit of difference to my milk supply mind you!

XX

 

[hesty14]

I never realised having a c-sec is also seen as failing! Blimey!

I had a section and ff from day 1 so I'm a total failure as a mummy. Who knows how my daughter is a happy, smiley, contented baby with me for a mum! Who incidentally has only ever been ill once in 8 months so the whole thing about FF babies being ill more is rubbish.

I have never seen my section as a failure. She was transverse so I had no choice as she was not even coming out bum first. This was after I'd been through the pain of a ECV by Lawrence Impey (google him) which did not work as she hardly moved and if he can't do it no one can!

I never wanted to breast feed but did the first feed and then tried again but she would not latch. I did not like it and it stressed me out. I was not doing that to myself. Sorry if that is selfish but I needed to be happy to be a good mummy and that is that.

I am at peace with my decision to FF and hate to be made to feel guilty and do get upset sometimes about it. However, I look at my little girl and the smiles I get when I look at her tells me I have not find that bad.

I hate the rough ride FF mummies get. I'm off my soapbox now. )


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[Lolly85x]

I never realised having a c-sec is also seen as failing! Blimey!

I had a section and ff from day 1 so I'm a total failure as a mummy. Who knows how my daughter is a happy, smiley, contented baby with me for a mum! Who incidentally has only ever been ill once in 8 months so the whole thing about FF babies being ill more is rubbish.

I have never seen my section as a failure. She was transverse so I had no choice as she was not even coming out bum first. This was after I'd been through the pain of a ECV by Lawrence Impey (google him) which did not work as she hardly moved and if he can't do it no one can!

I never wanted to breast feed but did the first feed and then tried again but she would not latch. I did not like it and it stressed me out. I was not doing that to myself. Sorry if that is selfish but I needed to be happy to be a good mummy and that is that.

I am at peace with my decision to FF and hate to be made to feel guilty and do get upset sometimes about it. However, I look at my little girl and the smiles I get when I look at her tells me I have not find that bad.

I hate the rough ride FF mummies get. I'm off my soapbox now. )


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Well said!!!
I don't feel like a failure for FF... My son is doing amazing. And I don't think our bond would be any different if I BF.
me and my OH take it in turn to do the bed routine at night. And it's nice for me to be able to have a shower and stuff, that I wouldn't if I BF.xx

 

[titch]

I never realised having a c-sec is also seen as failing! Blimey!

I had a section and ff from day 1 so I'm a total failure as a mummy. Who knows how my daughter is a happy, smiley, contented baby with me for a mum! Who incidentally has only ever been ill once in 8 months so the whole thing about FF babies being ill more is rubbish.

I have never seen my section as a failure. She was transverse so I had no choice as she was not even coming out bum first. This was after I'd been through the pain of a ECV by Lawrence Impey (google him) which did not work as she hardly moved and if he can't do it no one can!

I never wanted to breast feed but did the first feed and then tried again but she would not latch. I did not like it and it stressed me out. I was not doing that to myself. Sorry if that is selfish but I needed to be happy to be a good mummy and that is that.

I am at peace with my decision to FF and hate to be made to feel guilty and do get upset sometimes about it. However, I look at my little girl and the smiles I get when I look at her tells me I have not find that bad.

I hate the rough ride FF mummies get. I'm off my soapbox now. )


On tapatalk so can't see tickers
Excuse the typos, phone has mind of its own.
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Its really good that you feel so positive about things, and I totally agree, I wish I had felt like that, it did no good to me or LO being so upset about it all. I think when its an emergency section after induction it is actually referred to by medical staff as "a failed induction" theres that word right there. And for me, I was contracting for days I was exhausted, I was visualising having my baby in my arms to get through and saw every contraction as one step closer, when it suddenly got whisked from underneath me. It felt like running a marathon and being knocked off your feet half a mile from the finish line. Thats how it felt to me. Its wierd cos my mum had 3 sections and I never saw it as a big deal and certainly not a failure I never ever looked down on anyone else who had one, but for some reason, I couldnt give myself a break.

 

[My1stBaby]

I think everyone needs to give themselves and others a break!!

Ff is NOT failing. A c-sec is NOT failing- its called life and everything happens for a reason. Focus on what you're doing a great job on, not on what you wanted to do and couldn't.

It makes ff mums feel bad everyday when we see 'I've failed I've moved onto formula' no-one seems to realise they're actually telling those that ff that actually you've failed.

I just wish whoever wants to bf can, and whoever wants to ff can and wish that nobody felt or is made to feel guilty about it.

 

[hesty14]

I just wish whoever wants to bf can, and whoever wants to ff can and wish that nobody felt or is made to feel guilty about it.

Here, here!



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[Maria1977]

Like titch I did feel like I'd failed after my labour with my son. I was so upset because I went through alot, pushed for 3 hours. With lula she was planned section at the last minute, I didn't feel like I'd failed this time but one thing I know for sure is that I will always have a part of me that yearns to know what it is like to give that final push and deliver a baby into the world. I'm not dwelling on it anymore though, I love my children unimaginably, they are worth everything. But given the chance to know what that final push feels like I'd take it!

 

[mummy2b19]

I never realised having a c-sec is also seen as failing! Blimey!

I had a section and ff from day 1 so I'm a total failure as a mummy. Who knows how my daughter is a happy, smiley, contented baby with me for a mum! Who incidentally has only ever been ill once in 8 months so the whole thing about FF babies being ill more is rubbish.

I have never seen my section as a failure. She was transverse so I had no choice as she was not even coming out bum first. This was after I'd been through the pain of a ECV by Lawrence Impey (google him) which did not work as she hardly moved and if he can't do it no one can!

I never wanted to breast feed but did the first feed and then tried again but she would not latch. I did not like it and it stressed me out. I was not doing that to myself. Sorry if that is selfish but I needed to be happy to be a good mummy and that is that.

I am at peace with my decision to FF and hate to be made to feel guilty and do get upset sometimes about it. However, I look at my little girl and the smiles I get when I look at her tells me I have not find that bad.

I hate the rough ride FF mummies get. I'm off my soapbox now. )


On tapatalk so can't see tickers
Excuse the typos, phone has mind of its own.
Sent from my sexy iPhone5

Its really good that you feel so positive about things, and I totally agree, I wish I had felt like that, it did no good to me or LO being so upset about it all. I think when its an emergency section after induction it is actually referred to by medical staff as "a failed induction" theres that word right there. And for me, I was contracting for days I was exhausted, I was visualising having my baby in my arms to get through and saw every contraction as one step closer, when it suddenly got whisked from underneath me. It felt like running a marathon and being knocked off your feet half a mile from the finish line. Thats how it felt to me. Its wierd cos my mum had 3 sections and I never saw it as a big deal and certainly not a failure I never ever looked down on anyone else who had one, but for some reason, I couldnt give myself a break.

I feel like this I see my C section as a failer but it never even crosses my mind when someone else says that they had to have a section. I think its just human nature like if I go out and someones baby is crying I think nothing of it but if its A thats crying Im thinking omg everyones going to think im an awful mum because I cant stop my baby from crying.

 

[Karate Kid]

I am very pro BFing that does not mean that I think negatively about FFers.

I took me six weeks to get C to latch, due to Tounge tie. I was expressing and bottle feeding from day two. There were many tears and loads of stress but I would go through it again in a heartbeat.

This may be controversial but humans are the only mammals to give there young another mammals milk. I genuinely feel that breast feeding should at least be tried, colostrum is worth it's weight in gold. if it doesn't work out then obviously baby needs to be fed.

My view on BFing may stem from the fact that I was given up for adoption at birth and I have always longed for a 'bond' with my adoptive mother. Don't get me wrong she has done all she possibly can but it has been really tough at times. I was FF from the start and now that I am BFing I am loving every second of it.

Please don't take this post in the wrong way this is just how I feel. Motherhood is tough as it is so we should be supportive of each other but at the same time we are entitled to our own opinions. Xx

 

[BevG]

i have nothing to add to the bf/ff debate as it is. i just thought id share something i learned in psychology recently. in the 40's there was an experiment done in america on monkeys to try and prove/disprove freuds 'cupboard love' theory that a baby would love whoever fed it. a bunch of animal psychologists got some baby monkeys and put them in a cage with 2 cylinders, one gave food and the other was covered in terry towelling to give comfort 'love'. the experiment showed that the baby monkeys spent most of their time hanging out on the 'love' substitute and used it as their safe place, ran to it when scared etc. basically treated it as a mother figure and ignored the food giver except to get meals. this proved to the psychologists that the monkeys needed love to grow and develop and would form attatchment bonds to whatever gave them love and comfort rather than just forming a bond to who or whatever gave them food.

there are a lot of similarities between ppl and monkeys so i think that is applicable to babies too but theyre much cuter obviously lol. and so i shoot down the idea that a baby forms a more loving bond with its food provider as if mummy didnt give snuggles and love as well as food then baby wouldnt form the same bond. babies need love, food is a necessity for life but dosent dictate any kind of bond between mum and baby.

 

[Froslass]

I feel like a failure for having a c section. But that is due to my own ideals and the expectations I placed on myself, not what anyone else thinks.


When you have a c section you don't get the same rush of hormones as you would with a natural birth, which encourages your milk supply to start. No one tells C sec mummy's this, and they often expect milk to be in, when actually it usually takes 2 or 3 days longer for milk to come in! I struggled in the beginning with bf, my milk never came in till day five, so she'd get whatever I could express plus formula (She as in special care).

I then managed (no idea how as I had zero support!) to work it out with her, it took a lot of practice and she was exclusively bf till five months, and dropped night feed when she started sleeping through.

I'm of the opinion that if you can BF, then you should at least try. But if you can't, it can't be helped, and you shouldn't feel bad about FF. as long as baby is fed.

I do think all women should at least give it a go before deciding yes or no.

This is just my opinion, not a judgement on anyone on here.

 

[Belfast girl]

I don't really have anything to add but wanted to post as I'm a bit further down the line with my LO that I honestly don't feel guilty about how I choose to feed my baby! I felt awful at first, and even tried to justify my decision on how I fed to complete strangers!! Its taken a year not too feel guilty about ff... but I am so so happy with my wee girl, am so proud of her and her development and nothing could change my bond, or my OH's bond with her because he gets to feed her too.

I will give it a go again for this one - but disagree with people saying we don't know whats in formula etc - as its not a new thing as I was reared on it 30 odd years ago and my OH too and besides if it hadn't done us much good back then we wouldn't have been able to make something as amazing as our daughter and her sister/brother!!