Husband left me - feel so down.

[jocymum]

Hi Jo33- I'm just outside Brimfield !
Tipsy- I know what you're saying.... believe me I've got some friends saying the same things. It isn't that I'd take him back that easily ( I know sleeping with him was not a great idea but strangely It has made me feel more closure.... I think it's because i know then when the last time was....probably makes no sense but he-ho )
I am very gradually starting to not want him back and i'm sure i'll come and go and have bad days but it's starting to feel a bit better.
I woke up today and had the urge to sing...it's a new day, a new dawn, a new life forrrr me and i'm feeling good (could be delayed insanity!)
We are now talking about how to sort our animals out and I have told him that I do really want him to have a relationship with our son when he arrives and would never get in the way of that (have some v.v. strong feelings about it ) but have also said that I'm not happy for our baby to be in contact with just anybody he's 'seeing' ... if it gets serious with someone else we can discuss it then...he said he wouldn't do that and would always check with me about who our little one was going to be in contact with.
It's weird and it's scary and i think the pain is bound to come back but on the whole I am seeing light an the end of the tunnel - not to get back together but to be able to move forward on my own with my child, and my dog... i keep seeing a vision of us in a garden somewhere this summer with the baby on a rug with me, dog running about and I feel we'll get there

 

[jo33]

Glad you are feeling more positive about things!
You are probably not far from me at al, i live at Downton so not far- what a coincidence!
Are you hoping to have LO in Ludlow hospital? All being well i will be having mine there if all goes to plan!
Keep positive and if you need a chat just let me know!

 

[TipsyDipsy]

Oh i'm so glad your feeling better
Your new arrival will be hard at first but will bring you so much joy as well.
I'm also so glad you'll never use your baby as a pawn and let him/her have a close relationship with his/her dad.
You sound like such a lovely and forgiving person who knows to put your childs wellfare first.
Good luck for the future and hope you have a peaceful rest of pregnacy x x

 

[fran_23]

hun i'm sorry to hear this
i'm going through the same sort of thing and i'm finding it hard to cope.
my OH "found someone else" after we'd only been split up for a week and i fully expected us to get back together. he moved out but is now about to move back in as he needs to find somewhere permanant to live. i cant cope with the fact he has someone else already. its wrenching my heart out that even after all he has done to me i still love him. he says things to me that just kill me such as "dont think i havent been through this hurt in the past" ie it isnt hurting this time but past relationship breakups have been painful!
men are so hurtful i try to stay civil with him for hayden but its very hard after all hes said and done.

you gotta be strong for the baby and believe me i know how hard it is but your worth more and baby needs all your love :

good luck i hope it turns out ok for you xxx

 

[emma1976]

Hi hun,

I was so shocked to hear about what happened to you. I don;t really post on here now but wanted to say that if you go alone you will be fine.

I left my little girls dad when I was pregnant because of other women and no way would I have ever got back with him for my own sanity and trust, plus the fact I could never fogive anyone that slept with someone else behind my back or anything. My little girl and I have been so happy alone and I have coped more than I could possibly imagine. Also now we get on great for the sake of our girl and his new girlfriend is lovely and sees Jayden with him as well which I never thought I would find easy.

Time does heal things honey and you will get through it. I am glad that my ex has someone lovely now and it doesn't hurt at all, in fact I am happy for him now as you do move on and I hope she kicks him in line . I recently had a termination though as I was pregnant and this baby's father cheated on me. No way could I cope alone with 2 and no way could I have him back but that situation was different! I just wanted to let you know that things do turn out OK it does take time and as long as you both agree that baby comes first you'll put any feelings to the side and move on You'll be happy again honey - I can promise you that It is hard at first and can be for months but it does get much easier.

I never thought I would ever be feeling this way and finding things as easy as I do now but you do find the strength and you do it for the sake of the child

Good luck

xxxxxx

 

[jocymum]

Well sorry to bang this right at the top after sooooo long - but I wanted to update this thread- just for ME
I have re-read the whole thing and laughed my head off
My little boy is now 5mths and my universe- the husband is now an X-husband my life has changed in so many ways that I couldn't fit it all in. What I do feel is that no matter how bad life gets ( and it was terrible) if you are still breathing then there is HOPE
I have met someone new - well i've known him for years actually and he was there through it all, but it has changed into something else- and he is fantastic with Isaac and we are hoping to buy a house together.
Isaac's daddy (GIT! LOL) is spending time with him and even gets on with the new man, he regrets leaving us and I think in time we can be friends as long as he continues to behave.
I mentioned that in the summer I'd be sitting on a rug with my boy but truthfully I couldn't really see it----------- I am so there.....and soooo happy.Big thanks to the girls who got me through it

 

[Charlotte & Emily]

Glad you got through it ok
And its good that you are feeling better about it all now
Aww im glad you've found someone new too
My ex still cant talk to me because he cant believe we arent together anymore and that was over 3months ago
At least he is seeing little Issac

 

[eightball]

Hey, great to hear how ace you're doing!!
lots of hugs and high fives, siobhan xxxx

 

[glitzyglamgirl]

so pleased for you hun, it just goes to show how things can seem so bleak one minute and then suddenly the sun comes out

Your an inspiration babes

 

[trixipaws]

glad ur doing so well.

 

[mrs_tommo22]

Im so pleased for you and the way you dealt with it, Im glad you didnt let your husband back into your life.He didnt deaerve you and the love you gave him.
Congratulations on the borth of your son who im glad ghave you the push in the right direction.

Congratulations and I want to say you are amazing.

 

[jools221181]

I'm soooo pleased for you!