help..baby routine

[confuzed 88]

He woke up 45mins later, what shall I do? Do i let him stay in cot and try doze off? Or shall i pick him up, sane here I've been doing so much, I need a week where I'm not doing alot to get him into a routine.. I wish i found out earlier aswell

 

[littlemiss83]

Confused - try & settle him in his cot if he wakes too soon from a nap. Rock his cot if you can, stroke his face, put in dummy, sometimes it can take a good 15/20mins to re-settle (as franna said it gets shorter), if LO is proper crying I tend to lift him but normally he just has a wee whinge.

I missed the bit on the website about not taking LO out alot - we go out the house twice a day for an hour each time (school run) i hope this isn't having a negative effect

 

[Jayceesmumma]

Adapt the school run into his routine babe.. The fresh air does tend to knock them out lol!

 

[ft90]

Confused - try & settle him in his cot if he wakes too soon from a nap. Rock his cot if you can, stroke his face, put in dummy, sometimes it can take a good 15/20mins to re-settle (as franna said it gets shorter), if LO is proper crying I tend to lift him but normally he just has a wee whinge.

I missed the bit on the website about not taking LO out alot - we go out the house twice a day for an hour each time (school run) i hope this isn't having a negative effect

We always time his naps to go when we're going out. For example we went out yesterday all day really. So we got Caleb up for an hour before we left, fed him etc then when we got in the car, it was his nap time, he slept in the car, then for about 2 hours of shopping, then we stopped for food for an hour, so he was awake then, then he slept the rest of shopping and the journey home, then got up when we got home.

I know they say not to disrupt the routine with going out, but is anyone realistically going to sit in all day every day! LO would get no fresh air and all the mummies would go crazy! xx

 

[Lisa_85]

Sorry to jump in but can anyone share advice please, Issac seems to only want to sleep after a feed so should i do play time think feed? He fights his sleep already and is only 6weeks old. His nights are great but his days tire me cos he seems to cry if he isn't held x

 

[Jayceesmumma]

Don't give in babe I know it's hard but he's still young and u can break him out of wanting to be held all the time.. Have you tried swaddling him? Try and put him down as much as u can if he gets hysterical hold him to calm him down for a minute or two then put him down.. Keep doing that til he settles and he will get the hint in the end! Lol! This is why I hardly ever hold lilyanna as mean as that sounds and as much as I would love cuddles all day with her it's not beneficial to them.. I had to rock my eldest to sleep and hold her hand in her cot for two hours each night til she was 2 it was hard work! She was do clingy she had to hold my arm when out in the pushchair!!! Its hard breaking them of the habit the older they get so while he's still young teach him to settle himself.. Good luck babe!x

 

[Franna75]

Hows it going 88? Ive had a bit of a relapse and its because we've been out a few times, but today got back into it. Every time I thought of you and thought, i must write to you on here. It's not always by the book, but i did notice that i HAVE to put my LO in his crib (or on my bed) to sleep every few hours. I left him crying and i hate it, but i made sure he wasnt hungry (its difficult when youre BF if you dont think you have milk), made sure his nappy was OK. Made sure he wasnt scared of the dark, so put a mobile on and it worked! All three times today.

I suppose my advice is to just walk away, as long as he's not hungry. It will get better..xx

 

[Lisa_85]

I tried the routine yesterday and he slept loads but waa really unsettled on the night he was whining on his sleep, woke for his feed at the wrong times and fed twice and was really hard to settle again. He has a great night routine so I'm dissapointed it never worked for us x

 

[Alexandra84]

I'd have to disagree with the previous poster. Please don't leave your baby to cry themselves to sleep. It's been shown to be detrimental to their developing nervous systems and simply teaches them to be helpless and to keep their fear or discomfort to themselves because they learn that no one comes when they cry . I would try to settle your LO in their crib but always come back and re-settle if they get upset. To really learn to self settle your baby has to have confidence in you and be secure knowing that you will always appear IF he needs you. This understanding takes time and effort from you (you are the one with the power here, your baby is completely helpless and dependent on you). Taking shortcuts that damage their trust in you may work for you in the short term but surely being a parent is about making decisions that benefit your LO instead of yourself...

There is a reason why mothers feel so uncomfortable leaving their babies to cry,.. Because it's the wrong thing to do.

 

[Jayceesmumma]

I have to disagree with you there I've done this with all three of my kids and they are absolutely fine very confident and very clingy to me at times so they haven't lost their trust in me at all.
My youngest always settles herself as I've never cuddled her to sleep because I learnt my lesson with my first! I rocked her to sleep every time she cried and was over the top dependent on me due to that. There's nothing wrong with letting them cry for a while, settle them and then put them back down.

 

[Lisa_85]

I don't like Issac to cry but he whines for a while before crying so ill let him whine (sometimes he does this while asleep too) and then if he hasn't settled himself and starts crying ill go to him, hold his belly try his dummy and usually he is back off to sleep, works great from bedtime onwards normally but not through the day, i pick him up for snuggles and try putting him down while he is half aslrep/awake

I know why he was wanting to be held a lot though, he is a lil constipated... so i now feel bad for getting frustrated and thinking he was just clingy cos he can be. He is also feeding more so must be having a growth spurt

X

 

[Lisa_85]

I don't like Issac to cry but he whines for a while before crying so ill let him whine (sometimes he does this while asleep too) and then if he hasn't settled himself and starts crying ill go to him, hold his belly try his dummy and usually he is back off to sleep, works great from bedtime onwards normally but not through the day, i pick him up for snuggles and try putting him down while he is half aslrep/awake

I know why he was wanting to be held a lot though, he is a lil constipated... so i now feel bad for getting frustrated and thinking he was just clingy cos he can be. He is also feeding more so must be having a growth spurt

X

 

[littlemiss83]

I dont let kayden cry if i can help it, but the whole thing about it being bad for them, I think thats only in extreme cases, when babies are left to cry all the time. Its impossible to always comfort them when they cry. Especially if you have other children. For example, my eldest LO was having a bath tonight & new LO was screaming in his cot & I had to leave him while I sorted eldest LO out with her bath. Same for when the Tesco shopping was being delivered, he had to be left to cry. Its almost impossible to keep it up. Also, what if LO is in mums arms & screaming, does that still have negative implications for LO even though they are being comforted, coz lets face it, a cuddle doesn't always stop them.

The routine is working ok for me, except I also cant get LO to stay awake after a feed, I do it the other way about. He used to fuss for 2/3 hours after going into his cot, last week he's only been fussing for an hour so thats an improvement. When I take LO out for the skl run, I have it arranged so that he gets a feed & a small nap before we go out, so its kinda in the middle of nap time.

 

[Lisa_85]

I also found from trying this out that when he fights his sleep on a morning he sleeps most of the afternoon, say 1-4/5 has some fussy time and then back off from say 6-7/7.30 then bath fed and bed from 8 and he if normally having a feed about half 3 but he is still sleeping. I like to have a routine but for now I'm just going to stick with being strickt with bedtime x

 

[Jayceesmumma]

Babies need routine an consistency if u work them around what's best for you it will work for both you and baby!

 

[Lisa_85]

Im finding it hard to create a routine that will work as i live with my mam and at weekends i was staying at Andrews but that has stopped until he goes into his own room later and we make trips to see daddy through the week, he works 3shifts so nothing seems consistent, it drives me instance because pre prego i was pretty structured and had routine x

 

[Jayceesmumma]

It's hard to get a strong routine going when your in a situation like yours, maybe just get the bedtime routine sorted first and work on the days as they come x

 

[littlemiss83]

Once u get bedtime routine sorted everything else seems to follow

 

[Lisa_85]

thats what i thought would happen, he has a beginning of a bedtime routine, he is bathed, ready and fed from 8-9

he was waking 3.30am and 6.30am but he is changing to whenever feels like (he is having a growth spurt... i hope it settles back to his old routine after) but during the day he is all over the place, i thought i was seeing a pattern start but there is no pattern at all.

x

 

[Jayceesmumma]

Hang in there as long as the bedtime routine is fixed the rest can wait til he's a bit older.. Don't put too much pressure on yourself babe xxx