Giving Birth

[Mel_]

It's really interesting how people think about this topic.
A CS is so common that I think somepeople forget that it's major operation no-one would choose to be cut open for any other reason, I know it's something I definately dont want (unless of course it was the best thing for my baby for whatever reason, then of course I'll do whatever I have to do)
I'm not going to lie I am of course <insert> myself about the acctual event, but I try not to think about it because:-
1, I dont have any choice (she's got to come out of there one way or another) and
2, I have it on good athority that as soon as you see that baby you forget all about the pain, and every single person I know who has given birth even if their experience was fairly horrific said that it was all worth it.
Personally I dont want a CS and I dont want an epiduaral I dont even want to go to hospital, my experience last time when I had a termination (not out of choice for anyone who doesnt know about my past) with one of the midwives wasnt good and I dont want to be there again. Although I'm very scared of something happing like the cord being round her neck or something like that.
I still dont know what to do I'm really confused about the whole thing and I think that only seeing my midwife once (for the booking appointment) hasnt helped, but to be honest I cant be botherd with them I hate going to the doctors and I dont like the fact that they are a team of midwifes and you dont know which one your going to see and you dont get to know them and they dont seem to give a toss about you (again this is becaiuse of what happend to me before)
OMG I really should have posted this seperatly as this is a real issue for me, sorry I just started typing and it's all come flooding out

 

[Minxy]

its disgusting. anyone would think childbirth was a modern day wonder!
women in third world countries give birth at the side of the road then get back in the paddy fields and carry on working with the baby strapped to their backs!

And lots of women die in the third world during childbirth as well! You've been blessed with positive birth experiences Budge, and there ARE women who find it straightforward like you. But it's worth remembering that lots of people experience complications and have a difficult time. We've had some recent mums who've had difficulties. I think I may have died if I was left by the side of the road
A couple of members here booked elective C-section due to extreme fear of birth, and I think we should be considerate when we reply on topics like this.

(You know i'm only jealous, you lucky mare )

 

[Jaidy]

It seems like a few people didnt even read my post then....

I can tell the ones who did

Like I said in my post, my consultant wouldnt even consider giving me a C Sec for my panic attack and anxieties and I have a history of mental health issues...but he did manage to reassure me and give me a more positive outlook on the whole thing. Im sure if I had really pushed I may have got somewhere but he wasnt keen at all and to be honest, looking back, quite rightly so as why would they want to put a women through major surgery when everything else should be tried first to avoid this? However, I was so concerned at the time if he had offered me one I would have taken it. And I respect ladies that have to have a C Sec due to mental health problems, but NOT ladies that simply think its the 'easy and dignified way' of giving birth, thats quite simply taking the micky out of women like myself that are genuinly petrified of the whole experience

I agree with nathanmum and what minxy said.

This is a dodgy kinda subject and people need to think carefully before they post, thats all im gonna say!

 

[Mel_]

Oh Jade I do hope it wasnt what i said in my post that offended you, I did start off thinking about the subject in question then I got kinda side tract in my own slightly different fears, I'm very sorry if I did I dont mean to upset anyone.
Sorry
XXX

 

[Jaidy]

No Mel, it wasnt you, no one has offended me, I just felt a bit like my post had been slightly overlooked, I was a prime case of going to see the consultant to discuss a C Sec and I was not encouraged and I know I met all the criteria for the 'psycological need'.

A few posts just seemed to kinda dismiss what I said and continued to say you can get a section simply because your scared of pain...well im proof you cant or shouldnt just be able to get a section just because your 'scared' of the pain. You need a genuine, deep underlying phobia or medical condition and even though I feel my case was great due to my history even I was told it wasnt really a good option!

Please dont think im having a go or anyone has offended me

Its just a strong subject for me as I am genuinely terrified about giving birth but am going to fight to overcome my fears and just hope people can understand that its frustrating when people talk about sections just because they want the so called easy way out as mentioned in a few posts when to some people its a huge deal.

I hope I make sense....its probably my hormones!!

 

[Mel_]

Them bloody hormones have got alot to answer for!!
Well I do wish you luck and I hope that you can enjoy your birth (what a stupid thing to say LOL) it'll be fine.

Oh god I'm going to shut up now

 

[cloud9]

I know when I got pregnant I was terrified of the idea of giving birth, I wouldn't read about it watch anything about it discuss it, the more I have found out the less scarey it seems.
I may revert to how you feel at 39 weeks too LOL.

glad the consultant helped

 

[Jaidy]

Them bloody hormones have got alot to answer for!!
Well I do wish you luck and I hope that you can enjoy your birth (what a stupid thing to say LOL) it'll be fine.

Oh god I'm going to shut up now

Il try my best to enjoy it...you never know!

 

[Freya]

Maybe should not say this here but I actually enjoyed giving birth both times. Second time more than first because only had gas and air second time. Both natural births. I was more terrified of someone sticking a big needle in my back that I was about a babies head coming out downstairs.

Try not to worry. I read somewhere that the more positive you are about it the better it is. BTW I would love to do it again

 

[nathanmum]

its disgusting. anyone would think childbirth was a modern day wonder!
women in third world countries give birth at the side of the road then get back in the paddy fields and carry on working with the baby strapped to their backs!

And lots of women die in the third world during childbirth as well! You've been blessed with positive birth experiences Budge, and there ARE women who find it straightforward like you. But it's worth remembering that lots of people experience complications and have a difficult time. We've had some recent mums who've had difficulties. I think I may have died if I was left by the side of the road
A couple of members here booked elective C-section due to extreme fear of birth, and I think we should be considerate when we reply on topics like this.

(You know i'm only jealous, you lucky mare )

most deaths in third world countries are due to poor antenatal care, disease, poor living and birthing conditions not cos cs are not widely available.
nathans birth could have been hurrendous to anyone else. its a very personal thing and what type of person you are and how you deal with certain situations has a lot to do with it.
induction is a major catalyst in labour complications that have not been identified antenataly. i think how poorly informed we are in this country about labour and birth is a major factor women should not just take the advice of the midwife or consultant as the best option, go and research all your option i say and make an infromed decision. what you are told is what the that nhs trust works to not what is always better for you and babe.

 

[Minxy]

I agree completely with what you say. There's a fab book called 'Misconceptions' by Naomi Wolf which talks more about the health professional's agenda I recommend you (or anyone) should read. It's based on American authorities but a lot of it here rings true, like C-section rates being higher on a weekend etc.

I myself had a disgruntled doctor pushing me to surgery because I was taking up too much time! (I felt)

The point I was trying to make, perhaps not very clearly, is that pretending it's all very easy and straightforward can be hurtful to those who have had bad experiences or are genuinely terrified.

When I hear women talk about birthing like it's shelling peas I feel like a failure because I found it all so hard and needed intervention and an assisted delivery.

 

[budge]

its disgusting. anyone would think childbirth was a modern day wonder!
women in third world countries give birth at the side of the road then get back in the paddy fields and carry on working with the baby strapped to their backs!

And lots of women die in the third world during childbirth as well! You've been blessed with positive birth experiences Budge, and there ARE women who find it straightforward like you. But it's worth remembering that lots of people experience complications and have a difficult time. We've had some recent mums who've had difficulties. I think I may have died if I was left by the side of the road
A couple of members here booked elective C-section due to extreme fear of birth, and I think we should be considerate when we reply on topics like this.

(You know i'm only jealous, you lucky mare )

oh dear i was more refering to the likes of posh spice and other celebs who opt forc sections for vanity sake.
i do realise of course and im upset u all think i don't that there are people who need c sections as an emergency or for other non avoidable reasons.

 

[Minxy]

No, No No it's me veering off the original topic, I'm sure you wouldn't deny anyone necessary medical attention!! I hope I've explained myself better in my last post

 

[budge]

well i think ishould have written my post a bit better.
im such a slap dash poster at times.

 

[Mel_]

oh dear i was more refering to the likes of posh spice and other celebs who opt forc sections for vanity sake.
i do realise of course and im upset u all think i don't that there are people who need c sections as an emergency or for other non avoidable reasons.

Yeah "Too posh to push" just become a trend hasnt it.

 

[nathanmum]

yeah i get what your saying.

 

[Londoner Claire]

Why would anyone want a c-section to avoid the pain of childbirth? After having a c-section it's painful for bloody weeks and when I had one they wanted me to get up and walk around a couple of hours afterwards, no bloody chance!

 

[Jaidy]

Why would anyone want a c-section to avoid the pain of childbirth? After having a c-section it's painful for bloody weeks and when I had one they wanted me to get up and walk around a couple of hours afterwards, no bloody chance!

Lets face it ladies......whatever way the baby comes out its gonna hurt!!

 

[Londoner Claire]

True but at least once it's over it's over. I am really hoping for a natural birth this time.

 

[kirlykird]

Why would anyone want a c-section to avoid the pain of childbirth? After having a c-section it's painful for bloody weeks and when I had one they wanted me to get up and walk around a couple of hours afterwards, no bloody chance!

I was forced up the following morning after lying in bed in agony all night with only voltarol to calm it and a catheter stuck in me!

The next morning walking across my room th the bathroom for a shower was like something from a horror film! I was bent over double and was in a lot of pain realising that my body had just been cut in half!

Even at home, I was bent over double when trying to carry the babies.

I am going to do anything to avoid that again so ladies please wish me luck for my 34 week appt with my consultant