Feelings of jealousy

[redbear]

I dont really want to upset any mums, me and my dh where ttc 12 months (not long in comparison to some) anyway we didnt tell a soul, and when i did get my bfp i didnt even admit how long we had been trying, i was one of those annoying young mums to some. But really no one knew what had gone on behind closed doors. the temping, the headstands, the opks the tests and the tears.
I mean who doesnt want their life to be as perfect as it looks on facebook? try to remember a lot of it is sugar coated life.
I know its not much help and i hope you all get your bfp soon. xxx

 

[MoominGirl]

I know what you mean redbear. As soon as someone gets what we want we just assume that they had it easy. Then the raging hormones kick in and we're consumed with jealousy!! It's sad that TTC is just not something people like to discuss. I'm totally one of those and if I'm honest I don't really know why. I just don't want to and I'm usually fairly open about things. I think a lot of people are also unwilling to share so no one really understands what they've gone through.

 

[redbear]

I know what you mean redbear. As soon as someone gets what we want we just assume that they had it easy. Then the raging hormones kick in and we're consumed with jealousy!! It's sad that TTC is just not something people like to discuss. I'm totally one of those and if I'm honest I don't really know why. I just don't want to and I'm usually fairly open about things. I think a lot of people are also unwilling to share so no one really understands what they've gone through.

Yes its something that i never wanted people to know it felt very private. I just had to think like that myself at times but it was hard to do most of the time. xx

 

[millielaura]

I dont really want to upset any mums, me and my dh where ttc 12 months (not long in comparison to some) anyway we didnt tell a soul, and when i did get my bfp i didnt even admit how long we had been trying, i was one of those annoying young mums to some. But really no one knew what had gone on behind closed doors. the temping, the headstands, the opks the tests and the tears.
I mean who doesnt want their life to be as perfect as it looks on facebook? try to remember a lot of it is sugar coated life.
I know its not much help and i hope you all get your bfp soon. xxx

Defo this.
I look like one of the annoying young mums too but we were trying nearly 3 years and had multiple losses, an op, and 2 rounds of iui with injectibles to get Imogen.
I'm really conscious of how I look out and about.. I've noticed a couple times women giving me that look..the look I used to give every single mum with a pram assuming they got their baby easy. I used to feel so so down whenever I saw women with babies..and then it got to the point at a really bad stage where I couldn't leave the house because if I saw any women at all I'd just cry because it felt like everyone else in the world was capable of having and carrying a baby except me. Only now realising those women that used to upset me could of struggled too!
It does really get to you though. There still isn't a day I go out where I don't think of if I'm unintentionally upsetting someone. My heart still drops automatically when I see people announcing pregnancies on facebook, I don't think it ever totally leaves you. Sending you lots of luck and hugs xxxx

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[Alexis2017]

Had a hard day reading all the mother's day posts on fb today . Most ppl saying how its an amazing privilege to be a mum and it's something to look up to these strong women. It made me upset as it's not like us non mums havent been trying and us non mums can be stong women too. I actually hate mothers day. A day for card shops to make money. Mothers should be appreciated every day. Maybe we should have a ' women who aren't mother's day.

 

[Loveandpeace]

I agree Alexis I feel the same.

 

[Carly89]

Im in the same boat too. We haven't been trying too long, but every time I see a new announcement on facebook it makes me so sad. My brother in law has said they'll be trying again in the summer and I feel this pressure now it needs to happen to us before them. It's ridiculous I even feel that way! They got pregnant in the first month trying but unfortunately lost the first baby, however they fell pregnant again instantly. While that's amazing and wonderful, and I empathise with them for the misscariage, it's making me worry they'll concieve first time again and I won't be able to be happy for them. So sad and confusing how I feel, it's horrible

 

[Carly89]

And don't get me started on the patronising comments off other mums it makes me so angry. Don't think about it and it'll happen. Don't track your fertility just go with the flow blah blah blah coming from girls o know got pregnant by accident or first time �� frustrating x

 

[DeeDeeAbi]

It's terrifying how quickly TTC absorbs you isn't it. I remember with my son I was so naive at first- had no idea about fertile windows etc...And then once I found out about my cycles properly I got properly obsessed. I saw pregnant ladies or babies everywhere- total jealousy on fb (to there point I had to unfollow them), and I saw 'signs' everywhere (like seeing BFN on car registration plates). When you want something so bad I find it scary how fast you become consumed. Some people will never understand, and I know I'm really lucky to have my son but I'll never ever forget how it felt whilst desperately trying. Keeping everything crossed for all you amazing women on hear that are waiting for their babies xxx

 

[millielaura]

It's terrifying how quickly TTC absorbs you isn't it. I remember with my son I was so naive at first- had no idea about fertile windows etc...And then once I found out about my cycles properly I got properly obsessed. I saw pregnant ladies or babies everywhere- total jealousy on fb (to there point I had to unfollow them), and I saw 'signs' everywhere (like seeing BFN on car registration plates). When you want something so bad I find it scary how fast you become consumed. Some people will never understand, and I know I'm really lucky to have my son but I'll never ever forget how it felt whilst desperately trying. Keeping everything crossed for all you amazing women on hear that are waiting for their babies xxx

I unfollowed every single person who had a baby, was pregnant and I have to admit..anyone who was in a couple..just in case they announced soon! Now I'm posting stuff about Imogen and I keep thinking of people I haven't seen on newsfeed in ages and realising they are still unfollowed lol. I remember facebook being so so so hard xx

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[Alexis2017]

It is very difficult to believe it will ever happen. I actually can't imagine how it feels to see that positive pregnancy test and how it feels to be pregnant and telling your family and friends for the 1st time. I just hope I can get to experience this at least once. I was naive to think you just time it and it works! It is a shame it seems almost impossible to achieve something our bodies were designed to do. I guess we all have to stay strong !

 

[DeeDeeAbi]

It's a horrible feeling isn't it. I'm so sure it will happen for you and all this time will feel light-years away. The one thing I know has helped 4 ladies I know is taking baby aspirin from cd1...Have you tried that? Think it's meant to be really good for thickening the lining and circulating blood around the ovaries to stimulate xx

 

[Alexis2017]

It's a horrible feeling isn't it. I'm so sure it will happen for you and all this time will feel light-years away. The one thing I know has helped 4 ladies I know is taking baby aspirin from cd1...Have you tried that? Think it's meant to be really good for thickening the lining and circulating blood around the ovaries to stimulate xx

Baby asprin ? Never heard of that. May try it next cycle! Yeah it feels like forever already!

 

[Loveandpeace]

Same here Alexis, I feel like it would seem so surreal or like a dream WHEN it happens (not IF - positive affirmations ).
I guess that's they they are called little miracles, cos they sure are!
I haven't heard of baby aspirin either, going to google now lol.

x

 

[DeeDeeAbi]

Yeah, take the 75g dose everyday! It worked for me too. It's really good for your health over all! If you Google it there are a good amount of success stories xx

 

[Loveandpeace]

Yes I have been reading quite a few success stories on it! Especially from people who have MC. Although I haven't MC, I think I will give it a go anyway!

Ideally I would love to have my first little one by the time I am 34, its just under 11 months until my 34th birthday so this month would be perfect to fall pregnant. I know you cant time these things but still hoping and trying to be positive! x

 

[Alexis2017]

I am 34 In August and I want to be pregnant before that and have a baby before I am 35.. so by August thats 8 months of ttc...fx it happens before then. So do you just buy baby asprin at local pharmacy. ?

 

[Alexis2017]

Oh and I am so glad I left my old work 7 pregnant girls and all giving birth between december and June. I would feel so sad having to work next to them all. They all started trying January 2016 and all got their bfp pretty quickly !

 

[DeeDeeAbi]

How long have you both been trying? Really hoping you get your positives really soon!! I just bought it from boots in the pain relief section, it's really cheap too. It's meant to be really good for your skin and heart anyway so you can't lose from taking it! Oh god, so many babies at once, definitely good to be away from that. Xx

 

[Loveandpeace]

Alexis I think you just take normal aspirin, but a small amount, about 80g, so depending on the pill size, break it up if you need to.
2 of my close friends are expecting and another 4 of my friends/acquaintances or women I know are pregnant. To be honest I've been avoiding seeing them because I am pretty much the only one in my circle of friends without children or pregnant and I can't stand the comments.

FX it happens well before August for you!

Deedee hubby and I been trying since January. How long has it been for you?x