feeling like a failure.

[l_maclean]

I just feel awful tonight.

G is still not feeding properly. Sometimes she goes on properly, but the towards the end she starts fussing.

The HV thinks its reflux, but im not entirely convinced due to a lack of other symptoms, - also we had a disaster with gaviscon.

I had a look on Kelly Mum - and by all accounts there are loads of things it could be - and i feel horrible for not knowing whats wrong with her. I did wonder if she was larking about not really wanting to feed - so i tried slipping a dummy in when she started this - thinking if she was actually still hungry she'd spit it out - but lack of weight gain has now got me worried im cutting her off early.

I also think she's teething (although HV isnt convinced) - and ive read that could casue her to be fussy. But when i read how to deal with this it advises not to use anthestheic gels cos it makes it difficult for them to feed - but she's not old enough for a lot of the teething stuff - and i cant leave her in pain!!

Sorry for the rant - i just feel awful that she's not getting enough milk, and its because theres something wrong thats interupting her feeding, and i dont know what it is.

DH suggested topping her up with a bottle (i usually try and keep a couple of expressed ones in the fridge) - but that seems to be difficult as well.

All ive done tonight is cry.

xxx

 

[DW1978]

Oh hun, you most certainly are not a failure. (((hugs))). I'm sorry I don't have any advice, but I didn't want to just read and run xxx

Mummy to two beautiful boys; Lennon born 5th March 2006 and Jax born 24th October 2011

 

[TORino]

Aw lovely, have a hug I'm sure it's nothing you've done. They are sensitive little things sometimes I think.

Is she still gaining weight? I know we often think

Do you think she could have forgotten how to feed?

 

[l_maclean]

I actually have no idea. She gained some weight last week - just not as much as she's supposed to. have to wait till next wed to find out what she;s done this week.
xxx

 

[TORino]

Ooops missed off half of my post there.

We sometimes think they aren't getting enough but really they are and are gaining weight etc

 

[pinkyprincess]

Please don't feel a failure! We all have our hard days. Tyler used to fuss at the beginning of a feed, I thunk I had an overactive let down and would let the milk spray in a muslin before letting him reattach. Could it be something similar that affects the end?
Have you spent the day together in bed. Doing skin to skin etc? Have u contacted a support group?

Sorry for the crap advice!

 

[x_larlybelle_x]

G will be allowed the bongela teething gel - its from 2 months. I'm using it on Henry although he is only 7 weeks hv said it would be fine.

When he fusses on the boob he usually has wind, it can sometimes take 10 mins to get a burp out of him and he screams the whole time but carries on feeding afterwards. I can tell when the burp is coming as he quietens down. Xxxx

 

[Mrs. KM]

I know how you feel! Going through the same thing right now. K is in the 90th prcentile for length and the 6th percentile for weight. At ten weeks she is just 9lbs 10.5oz and 23.5 inches long. She completely refuses the bottle though so I don't even know how I can top her up. She is such a cranky baby that I feel like I can't go out with her. She is just so difficult to calm. She also has been getting fussy while eating and when we went to the doctor he determined that she has oral thrush.... I guess it can make their mouths itchy and uncomfortable. She also sucks on her hands a lot.... Don't know if this is any help, but wanted to say you are not alone, and you are certainly not a failure! Xx

 

[l_maclean]

attempted skin to skin but she wasnt really up for staying in bed. shes kinda grumpy just now. dunno if its the teeth or what.

we've got bongela and dentinox - but dont they numb the mouth??

xxx

 

[NinjaKitty]

You are most definitely NOT a failure. BF is hard and you need to be applauded for doing it. Deffo get in touch with BF support groups, hopefully they'll be able to help.

 

[Princess81]

You are def not a failure Hun. Don't beat yourself up. I would also suggest a support group xx

 

[l_maclean]

You are most definitely NOT a failure. BF is hard and you need to be applauded for doing it. Deffo get in touch with BF support groups, hopefully they'll be able to help.

we just have a monthly one here, and its not for another couple of weeks or so. xx

 

[Dustbunny]

Oh hun I can completely sympathise with you, I've been through the same with Chloe, I'm not sure there's any advice I can offer because I'm still struggling.

You are absolutely not a failure at all, you are doing amazingly well and have perservered when many would have given up.

Definitely look for a breastfeeding support group, the one I go to is right next to baby clinic and the women there have been so supportive and helpful. You'll be surprised how many ladies have the same problems.

 

[l_maclean]

Thanks ladies - HV is meant to phone me tomorrow, and then got docs appointment on thursday - so hopefully they'll have some ideas.
xxx

 

[Dustbunny]

Just a thought but does your clinic have a HV who is a breastfeeding specialist? Mine does, so my normal HV asked her to pop round and chat, and look at how Chloe fed etc. Would it be worth someone coming round who has specialist experience?

 

[l_maclean]

I dont think so. An we dont have LLL nearby either. xxx

 

[Sarah13]

Awww your not a failure! They all go through a bit of fussing stage, Kynon certainly did, still does sometimes! Have you tried the teething powders? Not sure the age for them tho. I also find Kynon likes to feed go a quiet place without distractions. Do you still feed on demand? I think this is important as they can mess about a bit and sometimes you feel like you spend all evening putting them on and off. What did the Kelly mom site suggest, it is a good site, Im always on it!

Sent from my GT-I9100 using Tapatalk 2

 

[Verity2011]

Awww you're not a failure hon. Is G upset when she's fussing and bobbing on and off or is she just fussing and bobbing on and off quite happily? As Ariel's becoming more interested in the world he will bob on and off sometimes depending on how hungry he is. He can sometimes fuss at the breast as well but I'll take him off and try something else with him and put him back on when he seems hungrier. I think you're doing a great job!

I would also say to let G soothe at the breast if she is so inclined - they're nature's pacifiers and it may help you both getting you through this difficult time

 

[l_maclean]

The Kelly mom site gave loads a reasons she could be fussing. So I'm more confused than ever.

She doesn't scream when she's fussingy, but sometimes she has a wee grump to herself

Xxx

 

[Nic36]

You are not a failure at all - breastfeeding is incredibly difficult. The NCT have a breastfeeding helpline- may b e a call to them might help? Xx