Feeling crushed and insanely jealous

[Binzy]

Hi Ladies,

Have been feeling down about this all week and haven't been able to talk to anyone apart from OH about this. My mum told me my brother's girlfriend is pregnant and due in July. I'm so so jealous and upset and I know it's wrong and I should be happy for them but I so wanted to be the first one to give my parents grandchildren and I know that once my brother's child arrives no one else will get a look in. I know I sound like a spoilt brat but my parents have been desperate to become grandparents for ages and never stop hinting and after almost a year of trying I'm just so desperately sad about the whole thing. My brother and his girlfriend have only just moved in together and it just seems so unfair.
It's going to be the only thing everyone talks about at xmas and I'm dreading it now as I always go home on my own and my OH stays here with his family and I'm just going to be bombarded with baby stuff the whole time whilst wishing it was me.

Thanks for listening, I feel like such a spoilt brat but the jealousy is eating away at me.

 

[Piglet's Mama]

Awww Binzy, that does well and truly suck.
So sorry you feel like cr4p, this month really is a f**ker for kicking everyone in the teeth.
I don't know what to say to make you feel better, all I can offer is a hug and to offer to put two fingers up to the world for you...?
x

 

[Nurse 26]

aww sorry hun, that sucks! many of my friends are pregnant and it makes me so jelous just want to be happy for them but cant. i have one sister and i know if i was in your situation i would feel the same.

Hope your ok. x x

 

[Olive]

Hi Binzy,

Hope you're ok. I understand hun. Although, I'm sure you're happy for your bro. Id be the same. I'm keen to be the first preg as well as we've been together longer than any of the siblings (and I'm baby mad). I think it's going to be tough but try not to show how you feel. We're all here when you want to off load babe. Plus it will still be special for your parents when you are. It'll be great for your Mum to have a preg daughter.

xxxx

 

[Kezzamunster]

Hi Binzy
Sorry to here your feeling down but can understand how you feel & know it's hard
It will be so special when you are pregnant cos your their lil girl
Try to keep your chin up & we are all here for you
Lots of hugs & kisses
xxxxxx

 

[misscrazycooki]

My mum is already a granparent twice over by my older sister :S

When I told her I was pregnant she didn't seem that interested and miffed me off :'( But she seems more into it now I have got past 20 weeks buying things and that...

I do know how you feel I was so fedup with trying to get pregnant when I was younger it got me down. I know you see it as bad now but at least your brother is going to give you a niece or nephew to practice on... Also you never know you may get lucky before christmas or during and have a new years good news to share

Wishing you loads of baby dust hunny x

 

[Binzy]

Thanks ladies I'd love to be smugly sitting around the dinner table on xmas day knowing that I'm preggers too but with my luck it's not going to happen. I spent most of last weekend in tears, it's ridiculous. I hate feeling so jealous but it's hard enough to avoid smug pregnant girl at work I really don't want to have to go through it all at xmas too. It's going to be so tough and I love going home at xmas and reverting to being a child and being fussed over for a bit ( I live abroad and my mother in law is bonkers so I never get fussed over here) and now all the attention will be on her pregnancy. I know how spoilt that makes me sound and I should just grow up a bit but that's the way I feel.

 

[Samsgirl]

my older brother has 2 little ones....i always remember my mum saying to me 'i cant wait for you to have your baby, cos you're my daughter and it;s much more special when it's your daughter'.....so there we go.....your mum probably feels the same xxx

 

[Mummy2Adam]

Sorry your feeling down hun, but as everyone has said it will be special for your mum once you are pregnant because it will be her daughter.
I really hope you will be sat at the xmas table knowing that your pregnant too, my fingers and toes are crossed for you x x


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[Binzy]

Thanks girlies, I hope my mum will feel that way too, or maybe the novelty will have worn off by the time I get pregnant!

 

[Samsgirl]

i doubt it....put yourself in her shoes and think about when your little ones tell you they are gonna be parents....i think your mum is going to be over the moon...regardless of your brother being the first....so dont worry x

 

[Binzy]

My husband's brother has 2 kids and he's always on about making him an uncle. It's the constant pressure that drives me nuts and feeling so powerless when other people seem to be able to get pregnant at the drop of a hat.

 

[Binzy]

Cor, imaging my future daughter telling me she's pregnant seems soooooo far away but you are right Samsgirl. I'm just feeling down in the dumps about it.

 

[Binzy]

The day I get my BFP you'll be able to hear me screaming from Italy!

 

[Samsgirl]

The day I get my BFP you'll be able to hear me screaming from Italy!

he he.......yep, we will.....!! YOu'll hear me from cumbria.....mixed with shock and panic...he he x

 

[LouiseB]

Aw i'm so sorry Binzy, i can totally understand why you are so upset

My brother and his girlfriend had a pregnancy scare and when i found out it was just a scare i have to admit that i felt suge a huge amount of relief.

That said, there is the good aspect of your own child having a cousin - family is so very important

Also, you are your parents daughter. Your child is always going to spend more time with your parents than your boyfriends child will. His child will spend more time with his girlfriends parents.

Women seek their own mothers for support when they themselves have children.

 

[Piglet10]

aww hun i think its totally understandable why ur feeling like this.. its prob worse if for the past yr u thought u wud be giving ur parents their first grandchild... i hope u get ur bfp soon hun... and as for ur mum... shell love all her grandkids equally and tbh most grandkids tend to be closer to their mothers side anyway!! xx

 

[Binzy]

Thanks for the hugs girlies, looking forward to being a proper aunty loads just not the build up while I'm struggling for my BFP.

 

[EmmBee123]

Fx for a Christmas BFP for you.

 

[maybe baby]

My Brother already has 3 and he's a bit younger than me, my Niece said 'I want Mummy to have another baby" I thought no way, I want my parents to enjoy my baby on its own for a while.

If that happens I'll feel exactly the same as you, keep up the good work and hopefully you wont be too far behind her.

Sending you lots of babydust!

xx