Depression support thread

[leanne1b]

Pinky, I so know what you mean about wondering when your next "crash" will be.
Toon, I can't remember if you said if you had spoken to your gp/hv or not? If you haven't try to. I know from experience that they don't always listen, but persist. You do sound really low at the moment hun, r u able to talk to ur partner or any family about it? Just so they are more aware of your feelings and so on
Take care honey and message me if u ever wana chat xx

 

[megsmeadow]

Hi girls,
I grew up with my mum having depression and found out my oh's mum has lived with it too. I now work in older people's mental health and I believe we are all on a sliding scale of mood and all have the potential to be very well, very unwell, or somewhere in between. Having Ross has just reminded me how fragile our mental health can be and how much we have to deal with. Problem is babies then tend to take priority over everything, look after yourselves and remember you are important too!

 

[Mrs.s]

Hi Girls,

this is a great thread I suffered quite badly with depression as a teenager due to bullying at two different schools i was cutting myself and drinking I ended up seeing a child Psychologist for about a year, she really helped me get through things and i was able to go out again and be a teenager although I never went back to school so I dont have any qualifications I still have a good job now I still have ups and downs but I dont let it take hold of me anymore and I think the counselling really helped me I would recommended it to anyone! hope all you girls are ok x

 

[Toonlass]

Hope everyone is feeling ok today

I know i should go back to my doctor and tell him i am no better and i really need my thyroid levels checking but making the trip to the doctors is such a pain in the ass with the kids. Then i would need another apointment for my blood test, then another apointment for the results, urghhhh such a faff! I have run out of all my pills but again its a pain in the ass getting them. I have to put my repeat in, pick it up the next day then trail to the chemist for the tablets. I know it all sounds so simple and i suppose it is but i feel so low that i cant motivate myself to do it, plus the kids get well cranky being messed about put in and out the car xx

 

[Mrs.s]

Hi Toon my mum has under active thyroid and sometimes she lets her tablets run out but it makes her soo down she gets really depressed about everything and I know and she knows that its because she needs those tablets!!! i know it must be a pain with the little ones but you will feel so much better when you have them and if your dose needs changing then you will feel even better once you have them ! xxx

 

[titch]

toon I know what you mean, just popping to the shops is such a mission. some pharmacies do a prescription delivery service for free, a possibility

youve had a tough time anyway recently, look after yourself xxx

 

[Elfs Mummy]

to everyone

I really don't even know how to start this, not something i ever really talk about i just try and hide it. I've been Self harming since the age of 11 on and off nothing really that bad but the bullying kind of got to me and that lasted till three years ago where my Dad almost died for 8 months he was in and out of hospital and i bottled everything up and everything went downhill from there but still i hid everything i was self harming everyday and was struggling to hide the cuts. Then March the year after I was sexualy abused by one of my soo called friends, from then on i was forced into counceling i put myself on a sevearly calorie restricted diet, was Self harming everyday and i tried to Od twice. That lasted till December 09 where i tried to get my self out of that cycle and i've only sh'd once or twice sinse then. No one knows how i feel now im trying to be strong for my baby but everything is soo much effort, i have no friends no one to talk to and everything is just getting on top of me... i really dont want to go back to the way i was ....

so thats me

 

[leanne1b]

Monkei, I'm glad you shared that.
Have u ever spoken to anyone about the abuse and bullying?
Please speak to your doctor, he would be able to give u some tablets to help you lift your mood in the short term, but to also refer u for CPU selling or something as tablets won't fix the feelings related to the past things, but speaking to someone might help you come to terms with it.
How's ur dad now?
I hope it ok hun
X

 

[leanne1b]

CPU selling was meant to say counselling! X

 

[Elfs Mummy]

I gave up on councellors i've had ummm 5 different ones the first left, second left, third left, fourth told me everything was my fault and 5th she sent me a letter saying that i needed to talk to her about the abuse and i couldn't yet i'd only been seeing her 2 weeks. The Doctors last year said i didnt need meds because i seemed happy, i dont think he realises that some days are worst than others.

Thanks for replying xx

 

[leanne1b]

Christ. I'm surprised I recommended them, as never been much use to me either, but works for some people.
I'm sorry Hun, r ur family any help? X

 

[ria__x]

hello. this is a great thread Toon, thankyou!

i'm not too sure what's wrong with me. i have been very messed up since about 11. i have been told i have all sorts but never dealt with properly. my family doctor was rubbish and psychologist told me when i was 13/14 i had been diagnosed with 'anxiety issues' and then i was diagnosed with depression after many years of trying to get help when i was 18, but the tablets they put me on.. think they're called citlopram, made me suicidal. and when i got pregnant i got myself referred to a counsellor and that realy helped.

but after having ickle man i returned back to my old self and it has been tough. i've now been diagnosed with OCD and depression but referred to a psychologist as i still have really bad ups and downs even on medication (100mg sertraline). i suspect i may have bipolar.

i didn't have any support until i met my fiance. and he's been a rock since. he can get frustrated sometimes as he too suffers with head problems (due to an accident) but he's done very well dealing with me! i infact had a anxiety, depressive episode today and i still feel pretty down. i can't get close to anyone because anyone who i've ever relied on including my family turn their back on me. i also get scared people wont like me when they see the real me. tomorrow i could be feeling completely fine and positive and can take on the world. but the next day i don't want to get out of bed because i can see hairs on the floor just after i swept it.

i just wanted to rant this out. as i'm feeling really rubbish. and wanted to say. i'm sorry you feel like that Toon, i don't have many friends either, you PF girls are my closest! i am on good tems with my inlaws. but they can sometimes be too much and the opposite of what i need.

i hope everyone is ok and know you can get through anything. i know i can, but in the meantime. i'm not in the best of places. at least i have my beautiful OH and son to put a smile on my face xxxxxxxx

 

[Toonlass]

Well done for sharing! Sometimes it's hard admitting your problems, I worry that people will think I'm a psycho lol. I've been given many 'labels' such as acute anxiety disorder, bipolar, borderline personality dissorder, OCD and even anger issues. I reckon I'll never get better but I hope that one day I'll get the right mix of happy pills to keep me right xx

 

[ria__x]

aw thankyou Toon. and yes i always think people will think i'm a psycho, i've been called it enough times aha

i think that i will always be the way i am no matter what. but you just have to find a way to deal with it and get on with it. i am looking forward to getting CBT treatment as it teaches you different patterns on how to deal with your behaviour apparently..

personally, i think everyone is a 'psycho' or have some aspects of every disorder out there, some people just know how to hide it better

thankyou again Toon

to everyone!!!

 

[pinkymum]

Borderline personality disorder has Been my main diagnosis. The only thing that has worked for me is intensive psychotherapy. They tried me on lithium, antipsychotics (not because of psychosis but severe self harm) anti depressants since I was 16. None of that helped. So I came off it all. I've been well for months now and I've never been well for this amount of time. I was talking to my therapist yesterday and I was telling him I was trying to work out "how borderline I am now" lol. I've talked about my worries of things going wrong but I'm just trying to enjoy feeling ok. I actually can't believe how much I've changed! It's amazing because I always thought I would be a mess! I don't have a crystal ball so I don't know what the future holds but for now I'm enjoying being ok

I know therapy isn't right for everyone but if someone like me can be well then I believe lots of people can. Sorry if I sound like a twat lol.

X x x x

 

[Toonlass]

I have tried therapy but all my shrinks have let me Dow by either leaving the practice or bit turning up. One of them used to tell me her life story and how she had depression I mean WTF! Is that supposed to help like! Lol xx

 

[ria__x]

lmao really? god that is so stupid. my counsellor left too the nhs always let us down in some way. my doctors just told me i have hormone issues for 5 years xxxx

 

[Terrie]

hey girls i did say i would post my story on here ages ago but i found it too hard, so ill try now.

ive suffered with depression most of my life but ive only ever been on medication for 1year and that was 3 years ago.. i stopped taking them off my own back because they werent helping with another thing i suffer with.. Dissociation. ive had a dissociation disorder for as long as i can remember and have been going to sessions to keep it under control since i was 15 (i did have a 2 year break from the sessions but in the end i just couldnt do it alone) the easiest way to describe dissociation is.. you know when you drive somewhere, and then all of a sudden youre there and you dont quite remember your journey because youre kinda on auto pilot? thats just what its like but i can be like that for days.

ok.. so.. why i have DD. i was abused as a child, mentally and physically for 14 years and sexually for 5 of those years. also included in that were forms of torture. the way i coped with it my whole life was to dissociate (let my mind leave my body) but once i got out of that situation when i was 14 i found that i couldnt actually control the dissociating, literally the smallest thing could set me off, so i started sessions.

ok so i realise this is a depression thread not a DD thread *doh* soo the depression is monitored carefully through my sessions and as long they are happy i dont have to go back on any medication, not that i would fight them if they suggested it, more worried about finding one right for me.

some days are really good, other days are really hard... but i get through it. feel free to ask any questions.. not many people have heard of DD before..

 

[Toonlass]

Terrie it must have took a lot of guts to share that with us I hadnever heard of DD before, it sounds terrible. Do you loose days type thing? Like sundenly it's Saturday but the last thing you remember Is Wednesday? Xx

 

[pinkymum]

Oh terrie I really feel for you! I've met a few people online over the years with DD. Must be so hard, does medication help? I've had mild dissociation when I've been under extreme stress. Used to happen at night and I'd do harmful things to
Myself but felt outside my body and not able to control it and then I'd wake up in the morning wondering what the he'll had happened!

Toon I think I've been really lucky because for years I had psychiatrists, therapists and nurses who I'd see for a few months and then they'd bugger off. But finally found decent therapists. I know it's defo not for everyone though.
I had a massive argument with my mum last night, same crap that it's been since I was little. She was abusive when I was younger. Feel a bit rubbish today but nothing like I would have a year ago. Life really sucks sometimes!

Have you managed to pick up your tablets toon?

*hugs* to all!