Controlled crying at 18m! Aaaargh!!

[Holi]

Rosie has ways been a good sleeper until she got I'll around Xmas time and it's all gone to pot!

She wakes at least once a night, and when she wakes there is no getting her back to sleep in her bed - so it's a wriggly toddler between mummy and daddy! And sometimes even that doesn't work anf were all up from 4am!

She's not going to bed early, normally around 7:30-8pm so I'm worried she's not getting enough sleep

Last night I lost my rag! She woke at 1:30am so brought her in our bed but she was still being fidgety at 2am so I just said enough was enough and put her back in her own bed

She went hysterical! I left her 5mins before going to see her then went in, lay her back down, kissed and left. Did this for about 40mins and she eventually fell and she stayed that way until 7:40am never slept in that long in AGES! and she's woke in the best mood!

Is that basically controlled crying? Anymore tips on what to do? I'm assuming we are in for a rough few nights but hopefully it'll be worth it!

Any advice, experiences or tips would be great!! Thanks lovely ladies!! Xx

 

[mrs v]

I have just done cc with my 8 month old, it took 4 days and she never cried longer than 5 mins! She has been sleeping 12 hours straight for the last 4 days, before this she was up at least twice. I know some people are really 'anti' cc but for us I can only see the benefits, we also have a 2 year old who was a terrible sleeper so I was determined not to make the same mistakes again!

So basically I would go in after 2 mins of crying, touch her chest and say shhh shhh, no eye contact, leave room, 're enter after 4 mins and repeat each time doubling the minutes, as I said within 5-6 nuns she as gone, I would do exactly the same when she woke in the night. It will probably be harder because your lo is that bit older so wiser lol! If you are gonna do it prepare yourself because it cn be heartbreaking at times...stick with it...no mixed messages because you will just confuse baby...good luck I hope it works for you! X

 

[Louise2013]

I have no idea personally, but good luck and let us know how you get on! Xxx

 

[Nomad]

Holi I could have written your post!! C was a good sleeper but it all went to pot at the beginning of December and now she spends at least some of every night in our bed. Hubby is determined to put a stop to it so he's been going in to her in the night and then leaving her for a few minutes etc. Seems to be having an effect as she stayed in her own bed until 6am with just one wake up last night. She did then come in with us but slept for another couple of hours Good luck with it!! X

 

[Holi]

Thanks ladies!! I'm nervous!!

Nomad it's so frustrating isn't it!! I miss my sleeping beauty! Can't help but feel to blame for this as I was so quick to just bring her into bed when she woke! And now she expects it! Xx

 

[Nomad]

I know what you mean. Think hubby blames me but it really was the only way she'd settle when she was poorly and now she just expects it! I'm almost 19 weeks pregnant with number 2 so she needs to get used to being in her own bed soon!!

 

[Holi]

Congrats on your pregnancy!! Rosie's sleeping his making it harder to convince oh to try for second soon! I'm desperate to get pregnant again! Fingers crossed our madams will soon get back Ito their routines! X

 

[Mummybexee]

I thought CC didn't work with toddlers :/

 

[Wilson28]

Its better to not do cc, its quiet damaging over a certain age, have you read the no cry sleep soloution book? its really good.
Have you tried skin to skin, getting in the bath together, reading a book together, and just unwinding.
Take things back to basics and youll have a happy bubs again
http://http://www.babycenter.com/0_baby-sleep-training-no-tears-methods_1497581.bc

 

[Nomad]

I have read the no cry sleep solution and it did work (to an extent) when she was younger. I was very anti controlled crying when she was younger and this is the first time we've done it. If hubby hadn't instigated it then I wouldn't have done it but quite frankly if it's the only thing that works then we'll stick with it! She's settled herself to sleep in the past so I'm not concerned that she's going to think we've abandoned her...

 

[Babygiz]

Holi we had a similar issue during the xmas period when he would wake about 2.15 every morning scream until he ended up in our bed. Once in our bed he settled no problem, we sooner learnt that once he was asleep we turfed him back into his own cot as we were getting no sleep. This then stopped and it turned into him not wanting to go to sleep at night, wouldn't settle no matter what we did. In the end we did a bit of controlled crying and put a comforter in with him whilst he was dropping off to sleep. Now touch wood he seems to have gone back to normal. Not sure if it's a phase or it's because he's had 5 teeth come through in the month, 3 of which were molars.

 

[Durhamchance]

I thought CC didn't work with toddlers :/

Why? I think it works better with toddlers. The whole point of cc is to let them know you are still here (that's why you keep returning) but you aren't going to get your own way.

I'm a massive fan of cc and it works for us brilliantly. I do apreciate it's not for everybody, but I'm a very no nonsense sort of parent.

 

[Holi]

Babygiz we sound very similar situations!

Wilson 28 - we do a lot of skin on skin and have the same 'bed time routine', nothing's really changed to warrant the change in sleep pattern really? Also she's fab at being out down to bed awake, we never hear a peak! It's just when she wakes in middle of night! Haven't read the book, will give it a whirl!

I don't think anyone would use CC unless it was a last resort, which I think is for some of us! Xx

 

[Babygiz]

Holi my little one was 18 months yesterday so sounds like an age thing. We did nothing different to upset his routine either it just started.

 

[Wilson28]

What do u do hunni when she wakes in the night? Xx

 

[Jojo84]

I was never in favour of cc but we used it on our son and it worked very well.. He's a very confident little boy and cc didn't harm him at all - it just helped get him sleep pattern back.

There's nothing wrong with cc at all.

 

[Natalilly1288]

I agree with jo my lo has just gone through a fussy patch but I used cc with her for 3 days and we are now back to normal with going to bed and sleeping through fingers crossed! Lol good luck! X

 

[Holi]

What do u do hunni when she wakes in the night? Xx

Well normally I would go in, pick her up (if she was stood up) and give her a cuddle for 2mins then pop her back down with dummy and put mobile on

If she was crying while lying down I would pop dummy in, re adjust her sleeping bag if twisted and put her on her side (her favourite position) put mobile on

Now when I try do that, as soon as I try and leave the room she goes wild so I began to bring her in our bed for a cuddle in the hope she would fall back asleep then I would pop her back to bed

Then she just became wriggly and unsettled even in our bed which would normally resulted in her being up for the day at roughly 4am - still tired and grumpy!

So one night I just thought 'no - your perfectly fine, you are going back in your own bed!' (Think mummy was sleep deprived!)

I'm not sure if this is a massive coincidence but tonight she woke at 12pm and I literally popped dummy back in and left and she didn't even wimper! Not heard off her since! She's not been like this in about a month!

In woke at 5am and I can't sleep now I'm waiting for her to wake up! - typical!!

Xx

 

[Becky1]

My lo is 19mths and sometimes wakes up in the night, I find that if I sit with him stroking him and shhhh-ing him gently (sometimes I sing too - how anyone falls asleep to that!!) it works. Sometimes just being in the room works too. Guess you could try that rather than full on CC.

I did do a form of cc/self settling when he was about 8mths and it worked brilliantly as at the time he was up 4 times a night. It wasn't as bad as I expected. Everyone has diff views on it but it but can work.

xxx

 

[laurat]

Holli I wrote the exact same post literally in December. R has been a dream sleeper till then. He was put in his cot fully awake, mobile on then left. A wee moan and wriggle and he would be left. Then come Christmas he firstly started wanting us in the room while he went to sleep. Patting or shhh'ing him. Waking in the night and screaming. Tried not to bring him into our bed in general but have a couple of times.

Discovered we thought he was scared of the dark so hall light left on and bingo a phase of our good sleeper back. Now its swings and roundabouts. He generally goes down and self settles at bedtime but we can have hysteria in the middle of the night and other times a sleep through. Im convinced its a developmental/teeth related thing. We really are trying to not bring him into our bed so I can be up for an hour literally standing in the room till he eventually calms and sleeps. Tiring but the laugh is he was at my sisters last night and Im still awake at 6 am today!