Co-sleeping

Discussion in 'Baby & Toddler' started by Holi, Jul 30, 2013.

  1. Holi

    Holi Well-Known Member

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    Hi everyone - my little girl is 8 days old

    I never thought I would have this problem!! My little lady will NOT sleep in Moses during night!! She loves it during day and we constantly put her in it for her to get use to it, but as soon as it gets to 9pm/10pm she will not settle in it!! And the only way I can get her to sleep is if she's next to me!

    Everyone keeps telling me I'm putting her at risk which makes me feel so bad - but I've tried everything! Hot water bottle in when she is out, resting hand on her chest, having a slight incline on basket, doing a big feed before putting her down, NOTHING WORKS!

    I wondered if you had any advice on how to get them in basket, or if you chose co sleeping from start and why?

    Thanks girls!
     
  2. CARNAT22

    CARNAT22 Well-Known Member

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    Will she sleep anywhere else at night?

    James wouldn't go in crib but he'd sleep in the carry-cot part of his pram (and gradually he got used to his chair as well)

    I've always taken James in with me for the odd hour but I've been too scared to co-sleep as such.

    It can be done safely, I'd suggest having a Google and finding out how to do it 'properly' and safely

    xxxxxxxx
     
  3. EmiLou123

    EmiLou123 Well-Known Member

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    Wss ^ ...

    My lo wouldn't sleep in his moses basket until he was several weeks old! I kept having to take the pram upstairs for him to sleep in! I had a few nights when I fell asleep with him when he was newborn, accidentally and through sheer exhaustion, and felt so guilty! But you need to do what is right for you xxx

    tapatalking x
     
  4. babybee

    babybee Well-Known Member

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    There are ways of doing this safely in bed - make sure the bed sheet is fitted, no pillows nearby separate blankets for the both of you etc. I did this a few times. I made sure I wasn't using pillows, I swaddled baby and held her in the crook of my arm. There was no way in the world she could fall out, I couldn't roll on her without snapping my arm off and if that happened I'd wake up straight away.

    Sofas are dangerous though, never do it on those.

    When I was exhausted it was much safer to co-sleep safely than to try and cradle her and accidentally drift off whilst she's still in your arms and you are sitting on the edge of the bed.

    I also hate it when reports/articles state that co-sleeping can contribute to cot death. It can't, cot death is inexplicable, if anything co-sleeping makes you more aware of your baby. The danger with co-sleeping is that you run the risk of rolling onto your baby or baby suffocating via pillows, duvet etc. if you eliminate those risks then I personally think its fine.

    I hope you find something that works for you both chick!
    Xxx
     
  5. stargirl

    stargirl Well-Known Member

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    I had this problem when my lo was tiny. He just would not settle in his Moses basket at night but if I lay him on my bed he'd be straight asleep. In the end I put him in his cot at 5 weeks (in our room) I fitted a pillow case from our bed onto his mattress for the first week or so, so his cot smelt familiar. I also started a bedtime routine and after about 3 weeks I now have a baby who loves sleeping in his cot, settles in it really well and now that he's 11 weeks and very aware he loves his mobile.

    But, however, come 5 - 6 am in the morning if I want an extra hrs sleep he ends up next to me in bed, after his 5am feed he won't settle back down unless in our bed, so I use to get up with him but now he's a little older, I just take all pillows off the bed, kick daddy out and make sure lo has his own blanket and we both have an extra hr before getting up. I only doze though.

    Hope you fine someway that works for you, good luck. X


    .
     
  6. Claire123

    Claire123 Well-Known Member

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    Have u tried swaddling? My lo loved being swaddled in her moses basket when she was little xx

    Sent from my GT-I9300 using Tapatalk 2
     
  7. SaraLouise

    SaraLouise Well-Known Member

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    I had (sometimes still have) this problem & the midwives in the hospital actually showed me how to co-sleep safely as even they couldn't get him to settle in his crib.

    As stargirl said, I normally bring him in with me after daddy has gone to work now for sleepy cuddles.

    Not really got any tips on how to make LO sleep alone, but don't feel guilty for co-sleeping providing your doing it safely.

    Its much better to co-sleep than to fall asleep with bubba on the sofa or something x

    Sent from my HTC One S using Tapatalk 4 Beta
     
  8. Holi

    Holi Well-Known Member

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    I've read the guidance on it to make sure it's as safe as possible, my OH is a bit more weary about it all. On one hand he's desperate for me to sleep, but then he is worried about her being in bed with me. She's only ever on my side (just incase OH isn't as aware of her as me)

    I just don't want to set ourselves up for a fight to try and get her out of our bed!

    Might give it another go in her basket tonight xx
     
  9. littlemonkey

    littlemonkey Well-Known Member

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    I can't really offer any advice on co-sleeping as it's not something I've done with LO. But if you do your research there are ways of making it safe. If your OH is concerned is there somewhere else he could sleep when LO is in bed? I wouldn't worry about your LO getting into bad habits at 8 days old, it's very very early days yet!

    I think this has been asked already, but will she sleep anywhere else like a carry cot etc? My LO used to sleep on his cosy in the day and sometimes the only place we could get him to sleep at night was in there, with one of us sleeping downstairs with him! Just to lessen your bad habit fears, the wee man stopped sleeping in it at all by 8 weeks.

    Do you put her down in the basket awake or do you hold/rock her until asleep and then try to put her down? My LO is 20 weeks old and still needs a gentle rock to sleep. Maybe try co-sleeping until she drifts off for an hour and then try to sneak her into the basket. I am another fan of swaddling and still swaddle my son's top half now for naps in his cot. I might have missed it in your post, but have you tried putting something that smells of you in the cot, like a top you've worn that day or a breast pad with your milk on it?

    Also when you say she won't settle is it just she won't sleep or does she start crying? If it's just she won't sleep rather than crying when being put down, it could be cos she's all messed up between day and night, which should hopefully pass soon.
     
  10. Holi

    Holi Well-Known Member

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    Little monkey - thanks for your post! We've tried other things like carry cot and even a swing at night and she still didn't like it! And when i say she won't settle, it's like she is constantly grumbling on, which then turns into a pathetic 'non' cry iykwim

    Had a break through tonight! So far since 11pm she has slept in her basket no probs! Woke up for a feed at 1am and still going well!! Although I can't sleep I'm so on edge! I'm such an anxious first time mum! Hopefully this is a sign of a more settled bedtime routine! X
     
  11. HopesDreams

    HopesDreams Well-Known Member

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    I second the advice babybee gave. I co-slept with O plenty in the early days. I would have got no sleep otherwise. He now sleeps in his cot with no problems. Never looks to get in with mummy unless he's teething & sore.
     
  12. Les1504

    Les1504 Well-Known Member

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    Hi Hun I would never put LO in bed with me, but I did manage to settle him on the fluffy front room rug a couple of times so I did lie down next to him and fall asleep there (although I woke up panicking!) an item on my clothing in his basket eventually worked for us. Those first few weeks are so hard, I remember being so desperate to sleep I would sit and daydream about it x
     
  13. HL28

    HL28 Well-Known Member

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    Are you breastfeeding? I've co slept with all 3. As everyone has said there's ways of doing it safely. I've got a bed guard on my bed so lo can't fall out. And I could feed laying down while we both fell asleep! Hun you have to do what you feel happy and comfortable doing. Xxx
     

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