Baptism - hmmmm ....

[X5OT]

Well, am hoping some of you may be able to help me out with this one!

I am Roman Catholic, and go to Church most weeks. Hubby is not religious at all, not baptised / christened, and none of his family are either. I want to get Jenna baptised, and hubby is happy to go along with this but we are having a few problems ...

1. I go to a RC church, therefore Jenna would be baptised here. The Church has stipulated that godparents MUST be Catholics. This basically narrows it down to my parents and my 2 brothers (all of whom live in Ireland). I would like to chose one person from my family and one person from hubby's family. One of hubby's brother's wives is christened, but doesnt go to church. I am wondering whether the priest would permit her to be the second godparent?? Otherwise the whole thing is going to be very one-sided. We have considered friends etc but most of them do not go to Church, and the 2 that do are Church of England and not friends we would consider to be close enough to be a godparent.

2. As hubby is not baptised, nor does he attend Church, can he even stand with me to make the baptismal promises?? Doesn't seem right if he doesn't believe in what he would be saying.

Help!!

 

[Squiglet]

Oh wow...thats complicated... your best bet is to go have a chat with your priest and explain the situation... because with your current situation, under the rules you've stated re godparents, you LO can't really be baptised... and I have yet to meet a Catholic dioceses that would not let you baptise a baby because you have godparent limitations... I'm pretty sure they will make an exception... failing that, you can always write to the Vatican and explain to them your situation.

 

[happy-chick]

We're getting Ellie baptised, my DH is Catholic but doesnt attend church and im not religious really at all.. my DH wanted to get Ellie baptised as all of his family is Catholic and im happy to go along with this.

We have been to see the priest & he has said that as long as one of the parents is RC and one of the godparents is RC then the others dont have to be... I would definately have a chat with ur priest though and see what they say

 

[ella]

I was told that if only one of the parents is catholic - one of the godparents must be catholic - but not both - so maybe check it again with your priest

 

[Nicola]

I had the same issues. Basically if you have one Catholic Godparents then people of another Christian faith may be what they call Baptism Sponsors, it's basically a Godparent to you and I but just 'different' to the chuch I suppose their way to be able to say you are and you are not Catholic type thing....churches can be funny like that. Baptism sponsors do not have to be regular church goers - they do like them to have been baptised/christened but it's not compulsory that they attend mass regularly or if C of E they don't have to have been confirmed either. Despite your husbands lack of faith/belief he can still make the baptism promises with you (my DH did) as you basicaly promise to bring the child up in good faith your not promising to be of faith yourself (make sense?). Hope that's of some help, we had issues with this too but go through ok last September.

 

[Xena]

My Dh isn't any religion but I'm Catholic.
We got married in a Catholic church
Our daughter was baptised in a Catholic church
Our son is going to be baptised in a Catholic church (on Sunday).

They basically said that as long as my DH is willing for our children to be raised as Catholics, then it doesn't matter whether or not he is one.

We have to have 2 godparents, 1 male and 1 female, and at least one of them has to be a practising Catholic.
If one is non-Catholic, they have to at least be Christian, and they are technically not a godparent they are a "Christian Witness".

 

[xrachx]

what a tricky situation, i hope you get it straightened out soon.x

 

[X5OT]

Thanks so much for all the replies so far! I will have a chat with the priest and see what he says. I am hoping he will be flexible, seeing as the only adult Catholics I know are my parents & brothers who live in Ireland!

Will let you know what he says .....


Also wondered if you guys are inviting the preist to the get-together after the Baptism? We are inviting family only - most of our friends are not religious / attend Church, and it is impossible to invite the couple that do without inviting all the ones who dont. so we decided to keep it to just family - although saying that, none of OH's family are Christened / religious either!! Seems the only ones who are are my family and me ...

 

[X5OT]

My Dh isn't any religion but I'm Catholic.
We got married in a Catholic church
Our daughter was baptised in a Catholic church
Our son is going to be baptised in a Catholic church (on Sunday).

They basically said that as long as my DH is willing for our children to be raised as Catholics, then it doesn't matter whether or not he is one.

We have to have 2 godparents, 1 male and 1 female, and at least one of them has to be a practising Catholic.
If one is non-Catholic, they have to at least be Christian, and they are technically not a godparent they are a "Christian Witness".

thanks for that - we were not allowed to get married in a Catholic Church as hubby is not baptised so we got married in Church of England - they didn't have an issue as long as one of us was baptised, even though a different religion! Did your DH stand with you to make the baptismal promises?

 

[abcd1234]

I've been looking at this too cos im not with baby daddy and he's not religious at all.
We're catholic and my mum has mentioned it to our priest, it makes no difference to him that the babies dad isnt religious at all, or that we arnt together, all he cares about is that she'll be another person to welcome in to the church.
I've also been told only one god parent has to be catholic. the others can be whatever they want lol.

It's a big thing for me to be able to baptise my baby thats why i've looked in to it already, she's not even here yet and my mums planning the after party

 

[Xena]

My Dh isn't any religion but I'm Catholic.
We got married in a Catholic church
Our daughter was baptised in a Catholic church
Our son is going to be baptised in a Catholic church (on Sunday).

They basically said that as long as my DH is willing for our children to be raised as Catholics, then it doesn't matter whether or not he is one.

We have to have 2 godparents, 1 male and 1 female, and at least one of them has to be a practising Catholic.
If one is non-Catholic, they have to at least be Christian, and they are technically not a godparent they are a "Christian Witness".

thanks for that - we were not allowed to get married in a Catholic Church as hubby is not baptised so we got married in Church of England - they didn't have an issue as long as one of us was baptised, even though a different religion! Did your DH stand with you to make the baptismal promises?

yes he did. the priest wasn't bothered at all!

mind you when we got married I was 4 months pregnant, so the priest knew we had been having pre-marital sex and he didn't mind about that either lol

maybe I had a slack priest?

 

[Nicola]

Yes we invited the priest to the party after the baptism.....he came but not for long as he had another engagement that afternoon to attend. Mind you we live in a teeny village, would have looked odd not to invite him! He also joined in the after wedding ceremony celebraions for a little while too.