Back from my hols, still in limbo

[Kay Kay]

Hi girls,

I got back from my hols to Florida last week and have a hellish week back at work so haven't had the time to update but have been thinking of you guys and checking your updates when I can.

I decided to not take my opks on holiday with me even though there was a good chance I would be ovulating. I just couldn't stand the thought of peeing in a cup when I was supposed to be enjoying myself! I've been taking opks for 21 months now so suffice to say I'm getting a bit fed up with them!!

We managed to relax and have a good time and get down to business quite a bit! I was thinking if we just relaxed and didn't think about ttc it might make a difference. Of course I NEVER stop thinking about ttc cos it's on my mind non-stop (I know you gals understand) but I did feel in a lovely holiday bubble without everyday stresses so that's gotta help. Here's hoping!

So I'm now in a weird position where I don't know when to expect my monthly bill. I thought I felt something going on down there on cd14 which would mean I would have a 28 day cycle this month...unusual for me! Average is 34 days! But I have been taking a high dose of evening primrose oil for the past 3 mths as my friend told me it can help regulate your cycle and I think it is working, well they seem to be shorter cycles these days. So that would mean my bill would be due this Friday. Fingers crossed for a Florida conception folks!!!!!

I have an all day wedding next Sunday which on one hand I'm excited for cos she's a good friend but on the other hand (selfishly) I'm dreading it cos it's my whole group of friends and the usual questions will be asked 'when are you guys having kids?' and in the same breath 'has it really been TWO YEARS since your wedding??' hint hint...grrrrr! And we usually get sat at a table full of pregnant women! Oh the joy! And I'm not sure what to do about alcohol. Ach well the witch might have made an appearance by then in which case I will be depressed and no doubt reach for the wine!!

Limbo time indeed (AGAIN!). Will keep you posted. I know I haven't posted often but just knowing you guys are here really helps me so thanks girlies.

Kay Kay xxxxxx

 

[sarah1]

Hi Kay Kay

Your holiday sounds great, I'm very jealous. Fingers crossed for your Florida baby!! How exciting. I know what you mean about weddings (or any social event) I hate them now. All those 'oo your wedding was a while ago' comments etc etc do my head in. And I feel awful saying it but when you are sat with people who have young children, all they do is talk about their kids, even if they know you don't have any. I feel like we are incredibly looked down on just cos we don't have any yet. I feel like screaming sometimes at them!

As for the alcohol, if your af hasn't arrived perhaps you could be the 'designated driver'? Or you could say you are on tablets or something. That's another thing that annoys me! I don't drink anyway and people always ask me 'why aren't you drinking?' as though its important (or they think I am pg), so annoying.

Lots of babydust and good luck xxxxxxx

 

[LouiseB]

Hiya KK

I went to Florida once and it was great

I can relate to the whole holiday bubble thing too - i recently went on holiday during my last treatment cycle and it was bliss. Just what i needed!

I hope it makes a difference for you

Everyone always asks me where the baby is as i blabbed about wanting a big family and just passed my 2nd anniversary too I just play it down now and act like i'm clearly waaaaaaaay to occupied with the other elements of my life to have given it much thought

I hope you have a nice time at the wedding. Everything in moderation Unless AF arrives and then you can go crazy lol

 

[ScotchEgg]

If's it any consolation, I found the questions stopped some time after our 3rd anniversary. People just seemed to get bored of asking us at that point...

 

[Kay Kay]

ScotchEgg - yeah I'm expecting people to stop asking in the next year or so. Well, there's always the odd insensitive idiot out there!!

Louise - I did the same thing, I told people the main reason for getting married was because we wanted to start a family (me and OH had been together for over 9 years when we got wed). I wish I had kept my trap shut now!! I tell my newly married friends to not tell anyone when they start trying cos the pressure you put on yourself is bad enough let alone everyone else asking!

In saying that I remember saying to some friends just after we got married that this woman in work just came right out and asked me 'are you trying yet?' (we weren't at that point) and even though I was moaning about her being so inappropriate my friend still said 'well are you?' AARRGGHHH!

Sarah I go through stages with socialising too, it totally depends on where I am in my cycle though. The whole hope/disappointment thing. A few months ago I found out 2 of my close friends were pg and even though I was happy for them (honestly I am) the selfish side of me was losing it and I found it hard going out for a bit. My OH really helped me though, he always does.

As for alcohol on Sunday we are staying over at the hotel if I get my AF I will def enjoy the wine at dinner, if I still don't know I will stay on softies and will just deal with the 'why you not drinking?' questions. Folk are so interested in why you're not drinking eh!

xxx

 

[Chazabell]

FX For a Florida baby

Have you been to Dr about not concieving yet?

xxxx

 

[Kay Kay]

Yeah Chaz we've been to the ACS after a 6mth wait. Everything is normal, they have found nothing wrong with either of us. I'm on a waiting list for an xray to see if my fallopian tubes are blocked, that'll be jan/feb. IUI will be next summer if still no BFP by then.

I have a horrible feeling AF is in the post. I was very emotional last night (okay, I was watching the lovely bones which is a weepy!!) but it was that uncontrollable sobbing and general feeling of sadness that I know so well. So another month goes by.........