Baby blues or more?

[Sarah13]

When do you think baby blues should end? I have felt miserable since the day my baby was born, he's 3 weeks old now but shouldn't even be here for another month. I have no motivation or enthusiasm for anything and everything is a massive effort. I hate feeling this way as so unfair on the rest of my family, Im sure my husband doesn't understand why I feel like this either.

 

[mum2b410]

Aww hun- so sorry u r feeling this way I think baby blues shouldn't last that long- have u spoken about how u feel to Dr, midwife or health visitor? It might all just b circumstances with him coming so early or it could be depression- they will b able to help u find out and support u through it either way! ..... My hubby never understood my PND- please don't suffer in silence and blame yourself for how u feel and say its unfair on your family- its not fair on YOU hun!! You never asked to feel this way or brought it on yourself!!....... I would try to speak to someone and just sound things out! Hope u feel better v soon xxx

 

[Hope81]

They can last up to 6 weeks.
With my it at pregnancy they certainly did. I started feeling a bit better at around week 4 and by 8 weeks I was back to normal.
Having a baby in nicu it is quite an emotional thing even if he is perfectly fine xxx
Big hugs. I would say to give it a couple more weeks and see how it's going and if it dosent start getting better to contact your hv or gp.

 

[Sarah13]

Thanks, part of it is I don't really have anyone I want to vent too, Im one of those get on with it motivated people and don't like people to see me not coping. Hopefully I'll feel more myself soon, feels like Im wasting this important special time with my baby being unhappy.

 

[mum2b410]

Just try to be kind to yourself Sarah! You've been through a huge shock and u need time! Putting pressure on yourself to feel happy will only make u feel worse I think! Vent on here if it helps! Just don't b hard on yourself! X

 

[Sarah13]

Thanks, I probably need to vent a bit. I did feel a bit this way with ds1 being a month early, took a while to move on. Don't know why we have to get so emotional and hung up on pregnancy and birth. Sad but Im so jealous of all the ladies over due right now, can't bear to read many posts on here just now, I love the last few weeks of pregnancy and that closeness you have to baby, I feel cheated again of the birth I wanted and the pregnancy plans I had left to do. Plus I've got my stupid masters still hanging over my head as obviously I couldn't submit, I wanted to be able to relax and enjoy my baby not think about crap. Just wish I could empty my head and enjoy this time properly.

 

[mum2b410]

That's all completely understandable hun- it doesn't seem fair u had to go through this all so early again! I felt v upset about my birth experience last time too- like my body let me down (obviously at the complete other end of the spectrum in being induced for post dates!). It takes a while to let that go I know!
I don't know how it all works with your masters submission but is there a process for delaying it all until the autumn term and getting mitigating circs?.... If u could park all if that in your head for a bit it would help right?? Xxx

 

[Sarah13]

I've got to submit in august now which is bugging me, right in middle of summer, thanks uni! So frustrating I only had a week left.
Feel bad moaning about all this, I know I need a kick up the arse and to get a grip!

 

[mum2b410]

Don't feel bad! It would piss anyone off!! Its crap its hanging over u and def not helping your mood! How is your little man doing?? Xxx

 

[Sarah13]

He's doing so well, amazing really I expected him to be in nicu for weeks! How you getting on, I've not been keeping up on here much lately?

 

[mum2b410]

That's great! Clearly a proper little fighter
I'm ok- just a but anaemic and achy......counting down the weeks now (but keep adding on the extra 2 in case I go all the way over again!) Xx

 

[Sarah13]

Yeah always best to add on two weeks or so! Second babies often come sooner and quicker though so hang in there x. In my mind this baby was coming in July maybe why it seems worse! Maybe I should subtract a few weeks if I have more babies. Some people are thoughtless though, my friend told me last week I must have a hostile womb as my babies can't wait to escape, er thanks, just what I need to hear when I already feel my body has failed.

 

[mum2b410]

Wtf?! How insensitive was that!! Some people really don't think!.... People said to me that he was too comfy- but I still felt like my body failed- I can understand how it works at the other end of the spectrum for u though hun xxx

 

[Sarah13]

Def have to think before speaking to hormonal women about pregnancy, labour and birth! Hope you don't have to wait so long this time, I remember the never ending days when I had dd and she was only 10 days late, luckily we didn't text or have fb 17 years ago so I didn't get pestered too much!

 

[mum2b410]

Haha! Yes- its all the messages and constant communication that don't help!!..... I hope that people keep their comments to themselves from now on and aren't so insensitive! Its the last thing u need right now xx