And then there were 2 :)

[Daisy2011]

Hello lovely, how is your eye this morning? Lexi racing around in her walker sounds fab, and seems like Elise is having a calmer week to. Good luck for friday, im sure it is a big worry and the wait for the results will be hard. The chances of it being anything very serious are low, espeically since youve had regualr testing and if it is something then they will have caught it early and get it lasered of in no time and back to normal.

What a bargain for the blazer , ive had some fab charity shop bargains and chagning the buttons what a fab idea.
Hope you have a great day
x Daisy

 

[Daisy2011]

Hey lovely how did your coloscopy go on friday? how are you?
x Daisy

 

[deedee84]

sorry for replying so late, had a hectic weekend

Colposcopy wasnt as bad as i expected, luckily she said the cells looked more like cin 1-2 rather than the more serious stage 2-3 so they just took 2 punch biopsies which was a little uncomfortable, had some cramping afterwards and some minor bleeding, i find the results out within 4 weeks. The nurses were lovely though, they made me feel very calm and reassured me. So hopefully when the results come back i wont need further treatment!

Saturday was the big reunion, which was totally awesome, the coach ride was a bummer though, we were on it 3 hours we were first to be picked up and had to pick up at another 4 stops it took ages and we all ended up with headache, mine was banging by the 2nd half of the concert but it didnt spoil it for me, i just ended up going straight home afterwards and fell asleep on the coach.

Sunday i left OH with the kids again to go to my brothers gf's baby shower which was good fun, probably drunk too much sunday night! OH had a few glasses with me, he was happily playing on poker with his sister, then i went up to bed, come 2am OH wasnt in bed, i needed a drink, heard the phone ring and then it was answered so i nipped down, grabbed a drink and had a nosey round the door to see who he was speaking to only to be greeted with blood silly arse had had a mega change in his mood, cut all his arm open and had had a go at his wrists but rung his sister before anything too serious occurred! So it was all tears and talking,him saying we would be better off without him! Anyway his mum came over on the monday, had a good chat with him and cried her eyes out and i think it hit home that he needs proper help now, so we have been to the docs today, they are referring him to the mental health team to see a psychiatrist and are getting that done as urgent! They have also upped his tablets, hate to see him like this, its crazy, one minute he is as happy as anything the next he's on such a low! we will get him sorted, just worried me when he said that his own voice was telling him to do it!

As for Lexi she has been sleeping a little better lately thank god, she wasnt such a good girl for her daddy saturday though, by the sounds of it she was constantly whingy, which i guess didnt help his mood!

Anyway, i think i covered everything that occurred this weekend!

xxx

 

[deedee84]

My DD#2 has been so blumming whingy lately, i have no clue whats wrong, i could say teething but i cant feel any new ones coming through. She slept abysmally last night eugh!!! Just wish this bloody amber teething necklace would hurry up and arrive, i contacted the seller yesterday as its been 2 weeks, she just said that sometimes there are delays and it could take 21 days or longer

OH has had a much better few days since his drama at the weekend, we both started our diet on Tuesday so i'm hoping some healthy eating and no alcohol will be extremely beneficial for him, the stopping drinking deffo will be!

Anyway better go, gotta hunt down Elises uniform! Kids!!! lol


xxx

 

[Daisy2011]

Oh no! thats terrible honey, Youve got so much to deal with at the moment. two children and a hubby who isnt well. worries about cervical cancer and difficult finances. I hope that some of the help can be practical for you to cope with the massive weight youve been carrying!

Glad that the reunion was awesome, shame that the journeys were so long!
Hope you have a calmer week and some help with things.
big hugs
xDaisy

 

[deedee84]

Thanks Daisy, things have calmed down with OH we have both been a little stressed today with Elexis been so maungy so he's gone upstairs for a bit of peace and quiet, i dont blame him really, but would be nice to do the same from time to time!

Been very impatient for 2 days, i ordered a new phone as mine is just becoming a nightmare to use with the touch screen been knackered in certain parts, keep checking the delivery status...still processing parcel it did say to expect delivery within 7 days, but then i checked earlier and it said expected delivery 25th May nooooo i cant possibly wait that long, i'm like a child near xmas, i need it now lol!!

Holiday is also looming only just over 3 weeks to go, and still to get Elexis some clothes as well as myself a few bits and OH a few bits! its gonna end up been a last minute thing! Just hope we get some lovely weather.

Right i'm off to sort my girls out for bed...Elexis is currently emptying the contents of her toy box ha, fabby!

xxx

 

[Daisy2011]

How lovely a new phone, just a long wait for it!!
Hope you have a lovely weekend and not long now until hols where are you of to again?
x Daisy

 

[deedee84]

Deffo a long wait! Hoping its in stock sooner than anticipated
Were just going to butlins at skegness but a holiday all the same and Elises first one too...shes only 6 ya know haha!! bless and hasnt even had a holiday yet! So i will deffo have to make it one to remember!
Need to start sorting out the case and things needed tbh, i've done elises things, just the grown ups and Elexis to do but then she needs new clothes anyways so deffo gonna be a last minute thing!

Went to my brothers yesterday to watch our team bloody lose grrr!!! can see the manager getting sacked now
had a lovely evening all the same anyway, was knackered chasing Elexis around, she kept making a bee line for the kitchen cupboards and then later fell asleep sat up in the play gym i have given them for their baby, was strange seeing her in there looking so big

Elexis slept ok i guess, would of expected her to sleep really well considering the late night we had but hey ho, we can dream!

OH seems to have had a better week, he looked a little down in the dumps yesterday morning/early aft so i think it made the world of difference going to my brothers and getting him out the house for a little while!

Today will consist of washing...ironing...housework and trying to stick to this damned diet! On a good note, starting the gym thursday actually looking forward to it!

happy sunday!

xx

 

[deedee84]

Well last night wasnt so bad with Elexis although at first i thought it was going to be a bad one! She fell asleep on me downstairs while having a bottle so she was in bed for 7pm, she woke at half past and then again at 8pm, then at 8:45pm so i ended up going up to bed at that time to watch tv, save my legs as it were! She then woke at 10pm just as i was getting my head down! I recall OH getting up once to her while i was asleep, not sure on the time, but for me the next time after 10pm that i saw to her was at 3:15am and then 5:30am, she woke a couple of times within ten minutes after that and again at 6:30am and lastly woke properly at 7:15am phew...actually quite a lot of awakenings but all mainly while i was still awake!

Her amber teething necklace finally came the other day too, not sure if it works or not yet and not sure whether to leave it on her at night time either! OH said no as it might get caught on something and strangle her but tbh its not that long and i cant see how it would catch on anything in her cot, anyway, ive taken it off for bed both nights just to be on the safe side!

Well i'm making OH do the school run this morning, anyone would think i had asked him to run a marathon for me the way he mumbled on! Glad he's doing it though, its so miserable out there, luckily ive been checking the weather for our holidays and so far its looking like we're gonna drop on a good week with just a couple of cloudy days nice high temps too, better pack some more summery outfits hehe!!

xxx

 

[deedee84]

Had me another half decent night with Elexis again, she did what she did yesterday...had a bottle around 7pm and fell asleep on me so i took her up early again, she woke at 8pm and then again at 10:30pm, i think OH saw to her once before i did again at 4:15am so i actually slept well from 10:30 - 4:15 a whopping 5 hours and 45 minutes, felt bloody refreshed as anything!

Not starting the gym today now, we got paid yesterday, had a lovely £60 worth of bank charges taken off because child benefit hadnt informed tax credits of our new bank account and so it went into the old one where there were charges!! grr, so now we have £60 to last us 2 weeks i have no clue how we will manage! but we will have to! But because of this huge error, OH was in a foul mood, taking it out on me and Elise, so i took Elexis out for the day as i really couldnt be arsed putting up with his mardy face! I got back in after the school run and we had a chat, he had self harmed again!!! Wish his app with the psychiatrist would hurry up through ffs!!!! luckily it was nothing compared to times before but he still did it at the end of the day! we will get him right one day!

Right anyhow i better get my daughter ready for school, she cant get into the room to me as her sister is hanging off the baby gate haha!! Oh joy!!

xxx

 

[deedee84]

Oh my...Elexis has slept well for 2 nights on the trot now! Sunday night she went 10:30 - 5:30 and last night 10 - 4:30 had some right sleep i have although for some reason it makes me feel more tired the next day, seems my body is used to the lack of sleep!!

We went to OHs friends wedding night do saturday! It was lovely to get dressed up and get out and about with the kids! Elexis screamed at everyone who spoke to her to begin with and then she was happily crawling along the dance floor later before scoffing her face and making a right old mess everywhere lol! Elise got herself a new little friend and so we saw nothing of her for the majority of the night, she was off running around playing! I was so proud of my girls, they looked so pretty and were so well behaved!

Been on my weight watchers diet for 3 weeks now! In total i have lost a stone and an inch off my hips, waist and boobs! Bit gutted about losing it off my boobs though haha! Been doing the 30 day squat challenge too which was so hard on day 1 but its got easier! Gonna start the gym after my holidays, i'm really determined to do it this time! I'm seeing results and its making me stick to it!!

Right off i go, get OH up and take my little lady to school

xx

 

[Daisy2011]

Wow well done you on your massive weight loss thats awesome!
It sucks about your bank charges , its so difficult to cope with stuff like that when moneys so tight. fab that Elexis is beggining to have proper long sleeps.
Did your phone arrive yet? when is your holiday?
hope you have a lovely week
xDaisy

 

[deedee84]

Hey daisy...the weight loss has slowed down now but im still keeping it up! I got bad news yesterday regarding my colposcopy results, its come back i have CIN3 which is the worst one, i just felt like eating everything thats bad for me but held off and had a few bottles of strongbow pear last night instead! As much as everyone keeps telling me not to worry and that everything will be ok i cant help it, after all, these cells are the ones that are turning into cancer and will turn into cancer of left untreated! Just another thing to add to my basket full of shit that is life atm! As you can probably tell, feeling a little low right now!

Elexis had the 2 good days with sleep...and has had 2 bad ones now! Thought we might have been getting somewhere, no such luck!

My phone arrived last week, i'm loving it, cant keep off of it and we go on holiday next Friday, its long overdue tbh and i'm needing it desperately after all the bad luck and what not!

OH went to see the psychiatrist yesterday, he's not bipolar or psychotic...phew!! he just has severe anxiety and depression and so are sending him to see a psycholoist to get to the root cause of his problems and to try and change his mind set to thinking more positively! Its funny, he came back from his appointment upbeat, we had a good chat how we were going to start thinking more positive and dealing with our problems in life and then bam...get my colposcopy results

Anyway...i'm off, need to see to some holiday packing and list writing and what not!

xx

 

[Daisy2011]

Oh lovely sorry to hear the results mean you have to go back. cin3 is not cancer and even if you had no further treatment there is less than a 50% chance that they would become a cancer. The lazer treatment is 95-99% effective at completley getting everything and so although its very hard not to worry you have to think that the treatment is so effective that it will be all alright youve just got to get through the worry and treatment.
Big hugs to you

x Daisy

 

[deedee84]

Thanks Daisy!! tbh i wish they still used the lazer! Basically i have to have local anesthetic, and injection in my cervix which apparently is rather painful! then they insert a heated loop which then burns the cells away! I got my appointment through which was for the day before we go on holiday so ive changed it as once ive had it done i have to rest for 24hours and cannot swim and so that would put a dampener on our first family holiday so now i have the appointment at 9am on 13th June! Glad its nice and early but i'm going to have to sort something out in regards to elise and school! Gonna try and put it all out of my mind while were on holiday and just enjoy the week away!

Elexis didnt sleep great last night! As from tonight i'm on a mission, gonna try and get her to go without milky feeds through the night...the plan was that she would sleep with Elise while on holiday but obviously this cant happen if shes still waking every 2-3 hours for a feed, poor elise will be shattered and have no energy to do anything on holiday, so as it stands, elexis is in with us on holiday unless i can get her to sleep better without feeds in this week before! Its a long shot but worth a go!

Anyway i better go and get elise ready for her last day of school before her school hols! Actually really happy that i dont have to do the school run for 2 weeks

xx

 

[deedee84]

Eugh...my guts have been horrid lately!! Wednesday night and early hours thursday i was up with the runs, friday back to normal, then got them again today feel shocking, Elexis had a decent night too, put her to bed at 7:10 as she was very whingy, she woke at 8:10 and then at 9:30, i went to bed at 11, OH woke her taking a piss and talking on the phone to his sister at bloody midnight but he saw to her and she slept until 5:30am, then she was restless until she finally decided it was time to get up at 6:45am, i really really wanted to stay in bed and sleep too :tired: never mind!!

Got nothing planned today...or tomorrow! Looking forward to getting some money in the bank so i can get the last of our holiday things and finish packing the case! I cant wait for this holiday now, hope we get some nice weather, even a couple of days would suffice but if not theres plenty of fun to be had indoors

xx

 

[deedee84]

For 2 days now Elexis hasnt had her milk out of a bottle, ive started giving her her milk in soft spouted beakers and her juice in her normal sippy cups, even at bedtime, so last night when she woke i tried leaving her for five to see if she fell back asleep and then went in and either gave her a quick drink of the milk or weakened juice, i think she slept reasonably well, i dreamed plenty of dreams last night and feel like i had plenty of sleep so maybe i did would love for missy to start realising shes not getting the comfort of her bottle no more and just sleep through haha, yeah right, we can dream!

Had a nice relaxing night last night, no beer, just nice ice cold diet coke and a chinese and then watched the hangover part II which was hilarious that was followed by candy crush in bed for a short time before getting my head down lol!

Today theres talk of a possible BBQ at the brothers, which would be nice! The weathers going to be beaut so it would be nice to make the most of it! My brothers OH has only got 4 weeks left of her pregnancy, baby Ava is due on Elexis's birthday but looking at the size of her i reckon she might come before, hope she dont come while were on holiday its my first niece i need to see her asap lol!!

Anyway, gonna get off and get cleaned up before sorting some plans out for today! Hope everyone has a lovely SUNday xxx

 

[Daisy2011]

Hi Lovely
hope youve had a fab day, weathers been awesome.

Glad that youve got your appointment sorted out- sorry i did mean the loopy thing. ouch but very effective at dealing with it. Sorry that you have to go through all of this.

Hooray for holidays. Elexi getting to be a big girl drinking from a cup! wow shes nearly 1 already! how time flys, how i wish youd had a full nights sleep since!!

x Daisy

 

[deedee84]

Thanks Daisy, we had a lovely day yesterday, Elexis was black bright though crawling around the garden all day! I kept having to chase her as she just wont keep a sun hat on and obv with her been strawberry blond-ish colour she catches sun quicker! It was nice to spend time with my brother and what not anyway! The diet went out the window slightly though, who can resist home made burgers and lovely pork and apple sausages hey

And thanks hun re the whole cervix shite! I'm managing to put it out of my head for now, which is good as i really didnt want it to overshadow our first holiday!

Elexis has had a few more good night lately...last night for instance, i put her to bed at 10pm and she slept until 4:30am, back off and slept until 7am and shes currently still sleeping seems shes having more good nights than bad lately about time too!

Think today i'm going to have a super lazy day! After all i have so much to do within the next week in regards to this holiday, still to finish off the packing and buy the odd bits and bats! So i'll have a nice rest day today before all the holiday chaos begins...it will be soooooo worth it though

xx

 

[deedee84]

Elexis didnt sleep as well as the night before but to be fair...3 hour stints is amazeballs!! Still felt like i got plenty of sleep, had some whacky dreams....man, i have missed dreaming haha!!
She ate like a horse yesterday, absolutely demolished everything i put in front of her, which makes me wonder whether were gonna get a growth spurt!! Shes had weetabix for breakfast this morning, usually a few spoonsfulls and shes turning her nose up at them, but not this morning, shes eaten the lot and some of her sisters too
Also managed to get her to say grandma...it wasnt perfect but we got the ma on the end hehe!!
She also must of been watching her sister lately as she has been trying to draw when shes got hold of a pencil etc!! Amazing how quickly they pick things up...even the little things! Her favourite thing atm...feeding the dog her snacks, gave her a cookie yesterday and she gave it to the dog and then cried, so i got her another and she went to give that one to him too, she ended up in her walker away from the dog haha!! Bet the dog loves it...his new best friend i reckon

We have a lovely miserable day here today...shame, ive enjoyed the past couple of days, nice sunshine to make me happy!! Lets hope it makes an extended appearance for our holiday! EEK tooo excited!!!

xx