And then there were 2 :)

[Daisy2011]

Hi Lovely its great to have you back.
Sounds like you are knackered though and OH thinks that his 5% is really 50%. I dont think so and your brother what a vile thing to do in trying to sway your dad against you. What a dick.

What a catch grabbing lexi before the floor! just shows that even though you are tired that your protective instincts are very good.

I hope that you can find a way to get OH to see how much you are doing and how little support he is really giving you.

Heres to us winning the lottery though could really use a holiday and a house in the country.

Hope you have a better week.
x Daisy

 

[deedee84]

Yep, my brother really has been a prize dick of late, i have no idea whats gotten into him, we usually get on so well and are so close so its shocked me how he has behaved!

Very true about instincts taking over too, i seriously felt boz eyed that night i was that tired so did well to catch her, and the poor little madam didnt even flinch lol! Really need OH to start helping more though, so hard to get him to understand, for instance i havent been well today, got back home with Lexi from my mates at 2:30pm and suddenly began feeling sick, the room was spinning,i was shivering, had a nap and woke sweating so i told OH he will have to do the night feeds tonight, his response "yeah i will when i come to bed!" he doesnt come to bed usually while 1-2am meaning he's gonna do all of 4 hours and i've to do from 9:30pm (thats when i go to bed usually to catch up on sleep) and i'm feeling extremely dizzy and not at all well, would it really hurt for him to have the monitor downstairs and nip up to feed her once she wakes!!! Dunno what to say or how to tell him that i need more help especially when i've put it as plain as i can, guilt tripped him about the near miss of dropping Lexi and still he doesnt offer...men can be so selfish!!

xx

 

[Spammy]

Welcome back honey. Sorry to say this but your OH needs a good talking too!! How incredibly selfish of him. If he can manage staying up until 2am for his own pleasure then he can look after his daughter too!! If he was working I would understand but he had no excuse for being so selfish. I think you need to tell him to get a grip! Takes 2 to make a baby. She's his responsibility as much as yours.

Sorry. Rant over. Just feel for you. You have had a really rough time of late and if your poorly you need a break!!!

 

[deedee84]

Thanks hun, thats exactly what i have said to him, that if he's on sick he can share the responsibility of night feeds etc! Its like if i go do the ironing or go get a soak in the bath, as soon as i get downstairs he hands her back over! He did the night feeds last night because i just felt awful, i went to bed at 10pm, he came up at about 12 (for once) and missus woke at 1am so i had to nudge him to go feed her and then he never lifted her out the cot, he just shoved the bottle in her mouth and when she had finished he went downstairs for a cig and left her stirring, at 4:30am he fed her and went down for another cig and Lexi started moaning again, so i went into her, she had been sick so i took her out the cot to wind her and give her a little more feedbut that was it then she was wide awake and ended up in our bloody bed, kinda just though "ya know what i'd of been better doing the feeds myself" so i'm making him do the school run today, there and back, gonna play on this cold/flu whatever it is and gethim doing some running about seen as though he seems useless in other parts, or maybe its purposely done so that i wont ask again, i know how coniving men can be lol!

xx

 

[deedee84]

I just cried last night, i felt so ill, was absolutely freezin and we had the heating on and i also had my fluffy dressing gown on, my skin felt sooo hot and sensitive almost to the point of been painful, every time i coughed it felt like i was swallowing a tonne of razors and then i had the prospect of waking hourly with missus when all i wanted to do was sleep undisturbed to try and get some energy back! OH's excuse not to fo the feeds tonight "well if i'd have known you wanted me to do them again i'd of had a nap this afternoon!" i never hardly nap on an afternoon, tried to tell him that i felt knackered anyway and getting up all night was gonna be hard, his reply "i had what you've got a few weeks back!" yes but point being you got sleep and didnt do night feeds ffs! MEN!!!

And yes...little madam slept shite, she had a quick feed around 9pm, we went up to bed at 9:20pm and as per she had her longest stint and woke at 1:20am so i got a decent block of sleep then, but after that it was crap, she woke at 2:30am, 2:50am, 3:45am, 5:10am, 6am, 6;05am and lastly 6:15am...i say lastly as OH went into feed her but she didnt want the bottle and just began screaming so she laid in our bed for awhile before getting whingy so we got up! God knows whats up with her, mind you she could be getting what i have, sooo painful on the throat, i could cry with it so i really hope shes not caught anything off me as its gonna be awful for her

Got my mates little girls party this tea time, shes wanting help setting up this afternoon, OH said i shouldnt with not been well, but i feel a tiny bit better today plus she has helped me out soooo much lately that i feel obliged!

xx

 

[Daisy2011]

Oh honey sorry that you are feeling so rough and oh is being so selfish. Im sure that a lovely quiet peaceful toddlers party is just what you need

Hope you get more sleep and fee better soon.
xDaisy

 

[deedee84]

Daisy...i think a toddlers party would of been quieter haha, it was my friends daughters 11th which meant lots of screamy girls lol Lexi was mesmerised with the disco lights and sat happily chewing her toy for the majority of the time, she started getting tired an hour before it ended and was in and out of sleep with the noise so we came home and lo and behold she was wide awake and chatty when we got in haha! Little devil! So you would think with all that excitement and her nodding off a bit later she would of slept lovely right?? Wrong she was a bloody nightmare, i took us up to bed at 10:20 and she woke for her first feed at 11:15 then it was 12:20, 1:10am (although the clocks had gone back so in theory it would of been 2:10 so went 2 hours here) 3:15am, 4:30am, 6:35am, 7:10am and she is currently still sleeping! Not sure if the bad sleeping habits over the past few days is maybe because shes caught what i have as this morning i've heard her cough and it sounds like it could be getting nasty, its not her usual forced cough that she finds funny! So maybe thats why shes not sleeping so well as obviously with babies you cant tell if they have a sore throat or feel a bit shitty and tbh if she is unwell shes doing ever so well as she hasnt been maungy at all bless!!

As for me i'm still feeling ill, every time i cough i feel like i'm coughing up shards of glass, same feeling everytime i swallow, its so painful, i'd rather have tonsillitis any day, my chests on fire and i'm coughing up all sorts sorry for the tim! I'm due at the dentist tomorrow, dunno whether it would be a good idea to move the appointment, wouldnt be so bad if it was just a check up but i'm in for a filling replacing and i guess having a coughing fit half way through is not a good idea! i'll see how i feel tomorrow i guess!

Now heres to a lovely lazy Sunday, shame we dont have the money to do what we usually love to do and pig out on all things lovely but hey ho, i'm sure OH could stretch to a tub of icecream for my poor throat hehe!

xx

 

[deedee84]

Last night was a bit better, to make her cot more comfortable for her when she first started going in it i used to lay her on her fleece blanket like she does downstairs and last night i wondered if she was waking because she was sweating as sometimes downstairs when shes been asleep on the blanket her head is wet through at the back, so the fleece blanket was removed and used to cover her instead! She fell asleep at 8:30pm and was fed probably round about 7:45pm but she kinda just laid there quietly for 45 minutes smiling to herself and drifted off by herself! Anyway we went up to bed at 9:30 and she woke for her first feed at 12:15am then 2:50am, 4am, 5:15am then woke at 5:30am so i brought her into our room fed her in my bed then popped her into the moses basket where she slept until 6:45am and then we got up as i got some lovely morning smiles from my gorgeous girl!

Think shes deffo got "the bug" too, shes been sneezing and has a terrible gratey cough, sounds like mine did to start with, elise had the same cough and both kids are dealing with it fine so how come mine bloody hurts so much???either theres doesnt hurt to cough or they are so much more braver than me lol!

Supposed to be at the dentist today but gonna ring up and rearrange as my throats still really sore and the cough is now tickly and i cant risk a coughin fit while the dentist has that drill in my mouth

Not impressed with the new contraceptive pill they have put me on either! Since going on it i've had a week on a period a week off, week on week off and so on,its bloody annoying me now and also the fact they put me on it off a whim, fair do's if u get migraines etc you have to change but my migraine was brought on because i cried my eyes out for a full day...which tbh is enough to give anyone a migraine! if it carries on like this through the next 2 packs i'm going back and telling them to put me back on microgynon because i'm not going on like this for the rest of my fertile life! grr!!

xx

 

[Daisy2011]

Oh no everyones got it!
I don;'t know if you've tried it but i love the chloroseptic spray- it tastes disgusting but then numbs whatever you've sprayed it on. When your throat is super sore it works a treat.

and keep on taking the paracetamol. I am only now feeling better after ten days of feeling rough with the flu and the paracetamol made all the difference. Hope the girls dont get any worse poor ladies.

The pill sounds rubbish definately dont stand for that messing about. Did you catch up your smear?

Good luck with the week, hope you all feel better soon.
x Daisy

 

[deedee84]

hey daisy, my glorious bug seems to be easing now, i'm left with what i can only describe as a cold, runny nose, cough sneezing etc

my smear results came back as borderline changes so i have to go back for another one in march grr!

xx

 

[deedee84]

what a bloomin rough couple of days! Here goes:

So Monday night Lexi started with the horrible barking cough, she cried every time she coughed so we dosed her up on calpol and tried best we could to get through the night with the intention of ringing the docs first thing to get our poor babba in! Well me and OH got zero sleep, she wouldnt let me put her down and would scream everytime i did, as soon as she coughed she screamed, her head felt hot to touch even though she had had calpol so at 5am i got up and asked OH to ring out of hours doctor to see if we could get a home visit as she clearly wasnt well! He spoke to a nurse and was on the phone for ages, the nurse wanted to listen to Lexi's breathing over the phone and then decided there and then that she was going to send the paramedics out and within 5 minutes the ambulance was here! They asked me to go to the ambulance so they could just check her over, they took some blood from her heal which got her upset alongside her cough and the pain she was almost hysterical so her pulse rate was sky high! They then told me because of her breathing etc that they were going to take us through to hospital as they werent happy with her obs so off we went, i heard the paramedic tell the hospital staff that they were bringing in a 4 month old girl who was tachycardic?? i have no idea what that meant but knew it was something to do with the heart, so when we got to the hospital they had resus waiting luckily the motion of the ambulance had sent Lexi to sleep and her pulse rate came down so we were taken to the a&e ward instead! The docs took her obs every half hour, her temperature had been at 38 every time! After 3 hours the doctor came around and said she has croup, he gave her some steroids to open up her airways and sent us on our way, although he did say it would probably reoccur throughout her childhood so to expect to be seeing a lot more of a&e she was awesome at the hospital though, she smiled at all the doctors and nurses and they were all amazed at the size of her! mum came through to take us home and when we were on our way out i heard one of the nurses behind the desk ask another "is that Elexis?" lol must of been the talk of the desk bless her

So anyway we got home, carried on with the calpol but she still cried everytime she coughed, she managed the odd smile and then night time loomed and as symptoms do they got worse, she wouldnt sleep, constantly cried and it broke our hearts to see her in so much pain, i was tired and grumpy, took her to bed in hope that she might sleep better but no...again she wouldnt let me put her down when she did doze off, as soon as she woke she screamed so i ended up crying as i just had no idea what to do, my eyes were so heavy and i just wanted my baby to be ok so i could sleep! OH came to bed and took over until 3:30am so that i could sleep then i took over to give him some sleep so at least we both got some sleep last night!
My precious little lady is currently laid on the sofa next to me, legs in air, hands in mouth looking very sleepy and smiling away to herself, i hope the worst is over because i dont think i can do another night like last night and the night before! I know shes not well but the constant screaming is so hard to deal with! And its so hard to get things done when shes clinging to me all the time! i will br glad when everythings back to normal!

Were supposed to be going to a halloween party tonight, i've told Elise if Lexi is still clingy i will still get her dressed up and her dad can take her trick or treating instead, she seemed happy with the alternative anyhow bless her!

So heres to hopefully a better day with Lexi

xx

 

[Daisy2011]

Oh dear thats a lot of worrying and sleeplessness. Hope that she is on the mend now and you can go back to 3 hrs sleep a night rather than one hour! How lovely that she charmed the nurses.

Have you tried a sling for the clingy times? Then at least you have your hands free. You can rig one up with material and try it out without buying anthing.
Sounds like you all need a good long nights sleep, hope you get it.
x Daisy

 

[Spammy]

Blooming heck how scary!! Sorry you Have had such a rough couple of days! Poor lexi!!!! Hope you get some rest tonight honey.

 

[deedee84]

thanks ladies, tbh its been a godsend having OH at home as we have managed to get things done together!

Last night she was very whingy again and spent a good half hour screaming, even when i took her to bed she was restless and kept crying out so i did expect to have another rough night...but...i put her in bed with me and she only woke twice at the beginning of the night (we went up to bed at 10:30) she then woke at 5:15am so i fed her then popped her in her moses basket and she slept for another 2 hours so i feel fab this morning after getting more sleep than i have since she was born lol!!
Shes very snotty this morning, but shes managed to eat some baby porridge now shes blowing raspberries at the tv bless her heart! i noticed also that everytime i gave her the calprofen, an hour or 2 later she would be screaming so gonna keep her off that today and see if its been that making her upset and unsettled, up to press she seems a lot better and happier so we shall see!

My mums taking Elise to hers today which will be nice, lately shes been really really naught, even OH has been chastising her which he hardly ever does, shes become very selfish, moans that she is bored as she has no one round here to play with so we allow her to have a friend over for tea after school or her uncle up to play and she carries on if they dont obey her rules, telling them she doesnt like them and they arent coming to her house ever again! She was playing on the computer with her friend the other day, she won the first two games and because her friend won one she kicked off, was going to turn the computer off "your not playing on MY game" she told him then made nasty remarks such as "i'm gonna draw, this is me and molly and this is Dawson falling flat on his face HAHA!" i dont know where shes got it from but we most certainly havent brought her up to be like that so shes been having lots of time out lately and those empty threat that we have made in the past have been put into action such as no computer for the day, no watching tv before bed etc! Who said terrible 2's were worst, i'd have them back any day!!

xx

 

[Daisy2011]

Aww look at that nights sleep woo hoo.
Poor old Elise she used to be the one and only child and now she has to share you and dad with new baby and everybodies to tired to be much fun
Its great that you are sticking to your guns on the dicpline, i hope that things settle down and you can get to the bottom of why shes having a grumpy month.

Onwards and upwards.
x Daisy

 

[deedee84]

Thanks Daisy, i'm sure its just your average 5 year old being a 5 year old as my friend said that her little boy is exactly the same! Its still hard work though when i'm used to her being such a good girl and doing as shes told! Its like now if she gets told off she tells us to shut up, or if we tell her to go to her room she just yells "no" at us which makes OH even more cross! I'm hopeful she will start to behave now that Christmas is fast approaching lol xx

 

[deedee84]

Yay...finally...got Lexi to sleep in the moses basket all night, OH was worried she wouldnt sleep as she fell to sleep around 7pm, by 9:30 she had still not woken so i took her to bed and she didnt wake while 1:15am what a stint...i should have gone to bed at 7pm myself...imagine! She only woke a further 3 times through the night for feeds and tbh they were small feeds where she more or less drifted straight back off! Downside to falling asleep early, the little mite wanted to get up at 6:45am so i complied haha! She is very smiley and happy after all! She has just eaten ALL of her baby porridge too which is great as since she's been poorly its been nothing or just a couple of spoon fulls!

Yesterday she was much better in herself, she didnt have a screaming fit all day...until around 6ish but i think she was just over tired, i ended up rocking her to sleep and she was sparko'd from 7pm At least i wasnt having to rock her to sleep all day like previous days, she was actually self settling on the sofa again yesterday, i think she is well and truly getting back to normal, which is more than can be said for me, i feel like my bloody jaw is broke or something, cant open my mouth as my jaw is so sore on the right hand side, seems to be more painful where the wisdom tooth is and i've been thinking that maybe i have an abscess , i'll see how i go in the next few days! I have the dentist on 16th November anyhow so i'll mention it then!

Just one more thing to add to todays Journal...it is finally November which means two things...bonfire night do love a good firework spectacular...Christmas decorations go up now that i am excited about, cant wait to see Lexi's lil face light up with the colourful trimmings and flashing lights Cant believe i can also say that its Christmas next month love Christmas, just not loving the fact i'm still worrying how were gonna afford Christmas! Grr, i'm sure something will come up before hand fingers crossed!

xx

 

[deedee84]

Well what a day yesterday lol! I put a picture on facebook Thursday night of Elexis asleep, my brothers girlfriends mum made one of her insensitive weight comments AGAIN and said "being overweight wont be doing her chest any good donna!" firstly, i had not mentioned her weight in the photo nor i had mentioned her being ill, it was more of a jokey caption i put as the header anyway...having lots of PF girlies on my facebook, they all had a go was quite funny, basically the woman in question was basically saying i am over feeding Lexi and its my fault shes fat, 53 comments later and i think its died down although dont quote me on that i've not checked in this morning ha, just made me laugh that this woman and her daughter have now unfriended me, boo hoo, seriously like kids! She has absolutely riled everyone with her comments! Especially as no one knows whether Lexi's weight is down to a medical problem atm and also she needs to understand (and God i have tried explaining to her so many times) that they arent concerned because Lexi is over weight they are concerned because she has gained it too quickly which is odd when she doesnt over eat and has only ever taken 50z max in one sitting (and then i think she brought half that up)

Anyway back to my gorgeous daughter, we put her back in her own bed last night seen as though shes so much better, she fell asleep at 8 last night and didnt wake while 12:35am, then she woke at 2:20am, 3:30am, 4:50am, 5:15am and then after that she was wide awake so it was more of a case of sticking her mobile on and laying in bed half asleep until i was sure she wasnt going back to sleep, in the end i tried her in the moses basket and she had another 45 minutes, needless to say i feel extremely tired this morning so as soon as OH gets up i'm off back to bed for an hour

Hers a recent pic of the lil madam anyway sat on her daddys knee Thursday night :')



xx

 

[deedee84]

ahh the argument still raged yesterday about my apparent "overweight" baby! There were names called and threats made and none by me or the lovely PF members or friends n family. Anyway, i was expecting my brother to ring or his girlfriend for them to have a go about it all, i received a text yesterday from my brothers gf, i though "oh here we go!" but surprisingly she said that she is ashamed and disgusted in her mum and sisters comments, they should learn to keep their gobs shut and just to ignore them and that she was going to be having words with them both! I kinda knew she wanted to stay out of it tbh as she liked the picture in question but never made any comment which was fine! Anyway, i think we can safely say its all been put to bed now thank God!

Now back to my darling daughters sleeping habits lol! She actually fell asleep last night at half 6 so i told myself when she next stirred instead of giving her a bottle straight away i'd pick her up and let her have some extra awake time to see if she slept longer through the night, she woke at 9:20pm had some smiles off her and what not and then by 9:35pm she was rubbing at her eyes and moaning for her bottle, so she had a bottle and was asleep by 9:45pm! We went up to bed at 10:35pm as i had managed to nod off on the sofa myself and she woke for her first feed at 1:45am so we didnt have such a bad stint there she next woke at 3am, 5am then bloody 5:25am, 5:35am, so i brought her into our room and popped her in the moses basket where she slept on and off until just after 7am! Gonna deffo try and see if i can get her to have her long stint of sleep later on today, so when the time comes around when she usually nods off for her long stint i might get the pay gym out or something stimulating to make her go a bit longer, wish me luck haha!

Lexi is at the HV for weighing again next week too. were there on wednesday so i'm looking forward to seeing what she is, i'm sure shes not put much on since last time just from what i could work out from the hospital scales but we shall soon see!

xx

 

[deedee84]

Seemed to have a better night last night, i tried to keep Lexi awake as late as possible, she got whingy at 8 so i fed her and laid her down but then she was trying to sit up so i sat her back up which i was happy about, anyway by 8:30pm she was zonked bless so little more bottle and off she went! She stirred for a bit more bottle at 8:45pm and at 9:40pm i took us up to bed! She woke for her first feed at 11pm then at 1:55am, 3:25am, 5am and lastly 6:30am i was up at 6:30 anyway as its school run day! these holidays have gone far too quickly, but at least the next ones are the Christmas ones

Feel bloody awful, told my friend i'd go up to the local pub to their fireworks display tonight, OH did say he wasnt gonna have Lexi as the football was on and he didnt wanna wake her with his shouting if they scored, slim chance of that he supports Southampton lol! Anyway dad happened to ring and invited us up there for fireworks and food, tbh this sounded more appealing anyway at least if Lexi didnt like the fireworks we could come in the house and besides the pub gets packed out! I just messaged her telling her that i couldnt go as Jamie wouldnt have Lexi and i didnt wanna take her out as she still wasnt 100% (tbh shes perfectly fine now apart from a small cough but hey ho) so were now going to dads minus OH, Elise is more happier at going to grandads anyway so no arguments there at least!

xx