Am i doing it wrong?

[Kayelle]

Seen a few threads / posts where many of you discuss bedtime / sleeping and I wonder if I'm doing it wrong! Or am I going to cause problems for myself later?
Brian is breastfed on demand exclusively. He sometimes sleeps in the day more than others, at the very least he will sleep throughout daily hour doggie walk, but can be longer if we go with oh or mil to park for example, but I don't ever put him down for naps, should I?
He has a bath in the morning before getting dressed so not before bed. Baby comes to bed with me at 10.30 ish no matter when he had his last sleep, I feed him and he is usually asleep in basket by 11 ish. We sleep till 2.30-3 am he feeds for 10 mins, sleeps again till5-5.30. He then comes to bed with me, feeds for 10 mins then we sleep till 7-8 then get up.
Should i be making him go to bed earlier ? I just assumed I would let him sleep when he wanted and that I was lucky this is when I'm asleep :-s I mean he's always with me, I wouldn't want to put him to bed when he's not sleepy and I'm not asleep cos I wouldn't be up there next to him.
What do you think?

 

[pinkyprincess]

Tyler gradually brought himself earlier by just being a grouchy monster so he actually goes to bed at 6.30 asleep by 7. I'm gonna try and push him back to 7 so he can eventually eat with us.

 

[BabyBrain]

You have to go by Brian hun and if he's happy with how you do it then that's fine. He's getting good chunks of sleep over night so he's obviously content. I've never purposely put Albert down for a nap, he sleeps whenever he wants no matter where we are. I'm sure this kid could sleep on a cliff edge lol

 

[BabyBrain]

Tyler gradually brought himself earlier by just being a grouchy monster so he actually goes to bed at 6.30 asleep by 7. I'm gonna try and push him back to 7 so he can eventually eat with us.

Yeah Albert gets grumpy after 7 and would go to bed if he could lol

 

[Kayelle]

Aah right, good to know. I just thought that when ppl talk about self settling and things it was to put them down for naps. Maybe I'm just confused lol

 

[MrsR]

I always cuddled DS and DD to sleep, allowed them to set their own routine and I followed their lead and we have no problems. Self-settling isn't part of the way we parent.

 

[Mrs N]

I wouldnt worry too much about routines and self settling, im not a big fan of it tbh, I think that when they are old enough to understand then they can start all of that! If it works for your little man then keep doing it, every baby is different so what one person does is different to the next!! My little guy goes to sleep at about 8 but we are early sleepers too so it suits us!!
xxx

 

[Kayelle]

Thank you feel better now. We are both so relaxed its easier to follow him. I'm glad I don't have to self settle or scream himself to sleep I couldn't do it lol I suppose if I want hungry or tired I wouldn't want to be made to eat or sleep

 

[beckyboo1]

MY theory is don't worry about it..we were rtrying to not so much set a fixed routine, but just spend a bit less time actually getting H settled at night..lbut at the mo its just not working so i'd say just go with what works for you.

If you want to try something then do it,.if it doesn;t work don't worry!

 

[BevG]

when Alyssa was brians age she went to bed at 3am ish with daddy lol. i would feed her at 11 ish and go bed n leave her with her dad, usually she was asleep and he would bring her up when she woke for a feed. then a bit older id take her to bed with me cos she was always sleepin after 11 then she started to fall asleep around 9pm and not wake up til i went to bed cos i disturbed her so i started putting her to bed when she fell asleep after 8. just follow brians lead hun

 

[clairebear22]

Sounds like you're doing fab hun! We never did self settling with Jack and he set his own sleeping routine until he was around 6 months when we started getting him into a more set routine. From 9 months Jack decided he hated being rocked to sleep and would fling his arms about until I laid him down.

Now at a year he'll settle himself to sleep in minutes x

 

[Kayelle]

Thank you everyone for your reassurance he's a very happy baby so think ill stick to it! X

 

[Mrs N]

The way I see it is when harrison is 18 he wont want cuddling so im making the most of it!! My friends try to get their babies to self settle and say it takes the 2 hours to go off sometimes and I kinda think that is 2 wasted hours!! Lol!! My boy is the happiest baby that I know and I think that is coz we show him love when he needs it!!
xxx

 

[mum2b410]

I think it only ever becomes an issue when its a problem for u or when LO isn't happy. We worked on self settling from around 4-5 months coz Ethan would only go to sleep by being rocked and held and it would take about 45mins to get him to go off this way (and he had at least 4naps a day!) and my arms and back couldn't take it anymore with his weight! We tried feeding to sleep as it had always worked but he just seemed to outgrow it! So in the end we got a light projector and worked on the self settling- it took a while but made a massive difference when he got it! He was able to take himself back off to sleep when he stirred too so we started to get some longer naps which helped both of us! Now he will have a quick cuddle before sleep and take himself off in the cot with the light projector. Sometimes I have to cuddle and rock him- like the old days, like when he is teething or over tired, but I don't mind now coz its only for 10mins or so and we get to have snuggly time- whereas he used to cry in my ear!!......If u r happy with the way things r and LO sounds v contented just stick with it and enjoy! Don't worry about routines, we only got into one around 6months and it happened naturally! Like u say just follow LO's lead

 

[My1stBaby]

Yeah I wouldn't worry about self-settling/routines at his age at all! Just follow his lead I never purposely try to get Max to self settle but sometimes he's just fallen asleep without me doing anything but its so rare n I don't mind getting him to sleep on me, I then move him off when he's properly asleep and he stays asleep.

You're not doing anything wrong you're doing a brill job xxxx