after m/c questions?

[MrsS15]

Hi ladies,

I'm currently still bleeding from m/c which started on Wednesday night. Hubby wants to start trying again asap but I'm not sure of some things. Will this mess up my cycle? My periods were every 26 days so should I hope that at the end of this bleeding I count that as cd1? Or will my ovulation dates be all mixed up? Should I just take it easy this month and wait till I get my first proper period and go from there? Sorry I'm feeling a bit unsure about everything xx

 

[Louloubelle84]

Hiya. I'm in a similar situation so will be following this. Sorry for your loss. I don't have any answers to your questions but i didn't want to read and run
Xx

 

[MrsS15]

I'm sorry for yours too loulou. How are you? Hopefully someone has some answers for us xx

 

[Foxy24]

Hi MrsS15 I'm sorry about your loss. Your cycle could be a bit messed up. I started to mc on the 26th September and haven't had a period yet. We didn't want to wait a cycle to try again so I started doing OPKs about a week after I stopped bleeding, got a solid smiley a week late compared to when I would normally ovulate. Everybody is different and other ladies cycles can be messed up more than others. I normally have a 32 day cycle and currently on day 41 so mine has been.
You should start trying again when ever you feel ready hun. Take care xx

 

[Foxy24]

Sorry for your loss as well Loulou xx

 

[Lolie14]

I miscarried last year and was told that the first full day of bleeding was classed as cd1. Mine were usually 26-28 days but the first after my mc was 31. After that they returned to normal and we caught 3 months later with our beautiful baby girl.

 

[Louloubelle84]

Thanks Foxy & MrsS. sorry for your loss too Foxy.

I am scheduled to have surgery on Tuesday. It was the better option for me. Tbh I have really struggled with this whole situation. I have had a few mad moments! But I'm trying to stay positive even though sometimes that in itself is very hard. I am hoping after Tuesday I can try and put this chapter behind me and focus on ttc again.

I am anxious about my cycle now and how my chances of conceiving again might be affected. I think we are going to try again right away but we are not putting pressure on ourselves.

Xx

 

[snowbee]

Hiya, sorry to hear about everyones mcs on this thread

I was also told to count the first day of full bleeding as CD1. As to whether your cycles and ov will be messed up this cycle it really is impossible to know. After my mc last year my cycles were completely thrown and didn't settle back to 'normal' for 6 months. I had a mc last month and I'm not sure if I've ovd yet or not, I'm on CD36 so far, hoping it won't be much longer but last time I had to get a bleed induced as af never returned. Some ladies ov as normal though so hopefully you will be one of those!

 

[Eryinera]

As other girls have said it can vary wildly on my first mc when I went for a scan to make sure all was gone (and I was still bleeding at that point) she goes "oh look that's your next egg ready to go any day it's a good size" I was told not to dtd though until I had finished bleeding gas my infection risk was quite high. I then had a normal period a few weeks after I has stopped bleeding and caught the next cycle. My cycles after that mc again returned quite normally almost straight away (normal for me is 14-31 days)

 

[cocosherbie]

It can vary. Ive had 3 miscarriages, after the first two, my cycles were a little messed up and I waited until after my first period after the mc to try again. My cycles ended up a few days longer after.
However with my 3rd mc, I must have ovulated exactly on schedule as I got my miracle BFP exactly 28 days after the first day of mc bleeding. Im now 25 weeks.

Definitely wait until you feel ready to try again. If you want to take a months break until you get your next AF, then do that.
If you're ready to try again right now, then count the first day of mc bleeding as CD1.
Good luck and Ive heard the first few cycles after are mc, you are very fertile. Not sure of that's an old wives tale but worked for me

 

[russellmuscle]

Sorry for your loss.

Echoing what the girls have said it can vary.

This was my first cycle ttc after my mc. I mc 15th september at 5w, bled for like 2 weeks in total. I began CD1 on October 11th, had my normal cycle and as I didnt fall pregnant this cycle I now know my cycle has went completely back to normal at a 28 day cycle.

Some ladies wait until having their first cycle before trying again as its less confusing. But if you have stopped bleeding and are ready Id maybe just opk every day just to make sure when you are oving.

xxx

 

[JoS]

I think it's so important to try again when you feel ready.
I got pregnant straight after I miscarried before my first period and then miscarried again.
This time I am just giving my body some time to recover before we try again. It just feels like I have put my body through so much.
But everyone is different and everyone's body is different so I would just go with what feels right to you.

 

[MrsS15]

Thanks everyone for your replies, really appreciate them all!

I'm not going to use opks or anything this month and just BD if I feel like it. I've only just stopped bleeding today so don't have a clue when I'll actually feel like it on one hand I feel empty and want a baby ASAP but on the other I just want to stop trying completely. It's such an emotional journey, I'm finding it hard to get back on the saddle xx

 

[Emily0505]

We started trying again right away as I didn't want to waste any time and getting pregnant again was all I could think about.

My cycles have returned to normal after my mc although I didn't count the cycle between mc and my first af as a cycle iykwim, but since then all is as it was.

I'm so sorry for your loss hun. Mc is just awful. Be kind to yourself.

XX

 

[MrsS15]

Thanks Emily - It really is! Its just so devastating when you finally get that positive and it gets snatched away, it's more what it does to you mentally than physically!

I think you're right not to count the first cycle as a proper cycle, I'll do that too and just hope I get my period and then things go back to normal. I do want another baby so badly, just scared xx

 

[Emily0505]

I'm terrified of getting pregnant again but it's all I can think about. It's all consuming.

I was advised when I had my scan to wait until after I had a period before trying again and I smiled and nodded but inside was like erm nope!

I think because it took 4 weeks from start to finish, I was so easy to start again as I felt like I'd wasted weeks on a pregnancy that wasn't going anywhere but I felt so awful about losing my lil bug. It's such a head fuck and nearly two months on, my head is all over the place.

The best piece of advice I received was that however you feel is ok. It's ok if you're angry, sad, want to be pregnant again, don't want to be pregnant again, and it's ok if you're ok. Feel how you feel.

Big hugs sweetheart

XX

 

[Carla81]

I mc on 6th Dec last year and was told to count CD1 as the first day of bleeding. I was told it was fine to start ttc again as soon as i was ready. We didnt really tho the the first month as it took me till 24th dec to get a negative hpt, tho i did then get a positive opk on the 28th!
Before mc my cycles were 34-35 days but after they were 29-31 days so it was actually beneficial for my cycles. I only had 2 further periods Jan and Feb then conceived at the end of Feb, so 2 full cycles after mc. I am now 39 weeks, eeek!
It will happen for u just try agan when your ready x

 

[MrsS15]

Emily, I'm exactly the same. Sending you a hug From the minute we finally came off contraception having a baby is all I could think about. Now I've m/c I feel even worse I keep thinking about all the plans we made when we got our BFP, every so often I remember none of them are going to happen and my stomach goes in knots. I haven't even said out loud that I've lost the baby to anyone. I got hubby to tell the few we'd told and I've just text them about it. I know that's silly but I can't say it! When I found out I was pregnant with my son I bought hubby a little pair of boys socks (I was convinced he was a boy from the moment I POAS!) saying I love my daddy, so on Wednesday (1 week after getting bfp) I bought him another little thing but a girl thing this time. I then cried my eyes out when I started bleeding that night convinced I'd jinxed it and it was my fault That's definitely good advice you were given. My emotions vary all the time and I beat myself up about it, so I think I needed to hear that. Thank you! I hope we both get our BFP very soon

Carla, that's amazing. I'm so pleased for you! You're going to have your little rainbow any day xx

 

[Carla81]

Thanks MrsS - i am being induced wednesday as i have diabetes!
Hope get through these hard times and get ur bfp again soon x

 

[russellmuscle]

It is weird the affects having a MC can have.

I didn't expect my BFP, I wasn't trying yet as soon as everything came to light, various scans, bloods the shock had set in - I started thinking about childcare, MAT leave as already having Jackson I had to be prepared. It took 3 days for the shock to set in and even though I knew I MC inside, no confirmation yet - as soon as I was told I had MC, OH and I made the decision that we didn't want to wait until next year.

I'd say although I am chillaxed about TTC, my opinion of having a baby definitely changed after having my MC.

You are not to blame, its ok for our emotions to get ahead of us! I did and I knew I had MC.

You will get there, keep positive, take each day as it comes.

xxxx