YOU AND OH

in one way becoming parents has brought us closer together but at the same time has put a huge, immense pressure on our relationship! all was fine and dandy for the first 6 months, then thats when things became really difficult
 
Stronger although you do have to work at it. We've made sure that we still have our own interests but that we also get out together. Having said that these days when we do go out just the two of us we really haven't got the enthusiasm to be out late like we used to anyway! Sad old couple that we are. We went to a wedding a few weeks ago and stayed for two nights and my parents had Elliott for the first time overnight. Once it got to 7pm on the day of the wedding my OH was considering driving 3 hours back up to see him because he missed him and was bored of being out!

I think our main struggle has been that I'm basically a stay at home mum (I work 4 hours a week) and my OH has a new and exciting career as a journalist. I feel that I have to work really hard to think or care about anything other than Elliott and sometimes I struggle to have anything to say. I try and read books that I know my OH will want to talk about, I read various current affairs magazines, listen to his work on the radio and keep up with news as best I can. We've always had a real relationship of equals, we met at Uni interview and studied the same subject to the same level and that's kind of why it works so I think it's important for us to still respect each other and to be able to talk on a level but it's hard when all you can think of is toddler training, what you've got to cook for dinner and whether the washing is dry etc etc and he's spent all day interviewing local MPs or out on a hovercraft or (like last night) watching the police blow up an unexploded WWII bomb!

I just think you have to be constantly vigilant with your relationship as it's easier to let things drift because you're so busy with other things. Ultimately we're stronger and better people because of becoming parents but it is a difficult journey and you have to be prepared to be honest with each other and work at keeping it together.

+++
 
stronger now but i resented him having any contact with my boys as i wanted them all to myself all the time.

xx
 
Stronger, i love him more than anything, the way he became dad to harrison and to watch him with benjamin just melts my heart, i know he would do anything for us.
 
Definately stronger and I was quite amazed to discover that once Jess was born the physical side of our relationship went back to how it was when we first met, we're always kissing and cuddling again now, it's lovely.
 
I think it is stronger but you do have to work at still being a couple and not just parents. I also agree with Rosebay that me not working atm has changed the dynamic of the relationship a bit in that my OH is out at work and meeting non-babied adults and while I am out a lot it's normally doing baby related things. So, James is my life at the moment but he's not the only thing my OH does. Having said that, I get to go to watch my footie team every 2 weeks (home games only!!!) and that does give me a break (and something other than James to talk about when I get back!).
 

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