y is my real dad being like this?

[muminseptember]

i have a dad that lives in york. i didnt see him for 12 years of my life. i found out i had another brother. my dad doesnt like my bro as he is gay. i have had his first granchild n he hasnt bothered. he doesnt see me and my to bros. he has a gf n her kids living with him. i dnt no wot do? i have tyred txt him and writting to him.

 

[Vickyleigh]

Sorry but he doesn't sound like he is worth your energy. For a start how could he not like his own son just because he is gay?! You have his first grandchild he should be spoiling your baby but from what you have said and sorry of this is upsetting or sounds harsh but it seems like he just doesn't want to know. Does his gf and son know about you? Maybe that could be a reason.
If he is upsetting you this much then maybe you are so much better off without him. Try writing to him and ask him if he wants to know or not, if you don't get a reply then maybe thats all the answers you need.....

 

[cassi]

I agree with the above, My dad left when we were young and he didnt bother with us ever again, He just pushed us out of his mind and blamed my mom for everything, stole all her savings and never even sent xmas or bday cards.

I was intrigued so I found him at 13 and I regret it, it hurt my mom and he really wasnt worth it. He was just like, here il buy you this, here some money, throwing his money around like it made him a proper dad. It made me sick, while he stole all that money from my mom and left her in masses of debt that she now, 16 years on is still in, and look at him in his big house with new cars and an alcoholic wife, That he beats up.

There is much more to being a father than dad. And my 'blood dad' Is nothing...My real dad is at home with my mom and his name is Nick.

 

[Hypnorm]

I agree with cassi, Its not worth all the upset, let him do the contacting if he i really interested then he will get incontact, if he doesnt then at least you know where you stand, if he can miss out of his own kids first 12 years, then that really sums him up.
Maybe write him a letter telling him how you really feel, and then leave the ball in his court.

 

[Sarah&Braydon]

aww hun there is not much i can say that the girls havent
try not let it upset u hun

 

[glitzyglamgirl]

My "dad" was similiar, he left when i was 6 and would write the odd letter promising to visit and I would wait for hours at the gate for him but he never showed up, then when I was 14 I got on a bus and he was the driver. I tried to get to know him but all he done was lie about my mum (the things he said sicken me), and when I had kids he wasnt in the slightest bit interested.

I decided that he wasnt what I wanted as a grandparent to my kids, he would only let them down and hurt them aswell, and havnt had any contact for over 10 years now - I dont miss him in the slightest and my kids are better off without him in thier lives.

It was a tough desicion but well worth it

 

[Strangeness]

My dad is a pain in the a*se to put it nicely. He drinks far too much and he doesn't give a damn about any of his 5 children. He's called his children the most awful names and it's like he hates us but says he doesn't. I refer to him mainly as my sperm doner because that's all he is he is in no way a dad. I have refused to speak to him for the past 3 years now as it always ends in hurt. He doesn't know I am married or have a child and I find it easier this way. I don't want him in my life ever again. Sometimes it's just not worth it hun