what to do???? =(

[xnicolaxcx]

Hey ladies.
Im gutted iv just found out my OH has been emailing his ex girlfriend on facebook. After he swore on our sons life he just added her to wind me up after a row. He told me he hasnt seen or spoken to her sinse they split. The messages wasnt flirty but its hurt because hes gone behind my back and sworn on finleys life Hes always slagging her off but they seemed like best friends.
My OH doesn't know i went on his account so i don't know if i should confront him?

Advice much wanted please

 

[CoreysMummy]

Oooh, tough one hun

If you dont confront him then you can keep checking...? If you do, then he will change password etc, and know that you were checking up on him. BUT he will also know that he lied. But this could even things out... seen as there was nothing flirty etc in the msgs, he could see that as u both did wrong. End of story. Which will be no good for you, because that wont really help, you wont have any answers.

Eakkk, I dont know, I hope that gobble-dee-gook up there kind of makes scence, I know what im thinking.

 

[xnicolaxcx]

Well Ive just confronted him and he went absolubtly mental he was calling me all nasty names and told me he was going to smash my nose and the computer over my head He doesnt think he has done anything wrong.
I also found that he was slagging me off to some other girl aswell.
He said he doesnt want to be with me anymore because I'm nosey and has gone home and told me he won't look after Finley tomorow whilst I'm at work.

 

[CoreysMummy]

Ahhh - Mmm, thats what I was worried about... cant believe he went that mental though, I know id be anoyed, but Id also know that id done wrong too, so wouldnt be able to climb to high up on that horse of mine!! Men!!

Im sorry, I hope he calms down

 

[fran_23]

sorry but he didn't really do anything wrong and he probably feels like his privacy has been invaded, You said the messages were not flirty..ok you might not like him talking to his ex..who the hell would! but he told you he added her to wind you up which was wrong of him..but maybe she messaged him just to say hi how are you as he had added her and he was just being polite replying.

You have both been in the wrong a bit here leave him to calm down and think about it and i would text him tommorow and apologise for going on his account..explain why you did it and he may see that by adding her he has made you suspitious.
If you don't have trust you dont have anything.. hope you sort it out!

PS i think its wrong to say he won't look after the baby because you have to work and thats just being childish..hope he changes his mind when he calms down.

 

[mum2A&L]

Well Ive just confronted him and he went absolubtly mental he was calling me all nasty names and told me he was going to smash my nose and the computer over my head He doesnt think he has done anything wrong.
I also found that he was slagging me off to some other girl aswell.
He said he doesnt want to be with me anymore because I'm nosey and has gone home and told me he won't look after Finley tomorow whilst I'm at work.

Its not Finleys fault!! i hope regardless of what happens in the long run he doesn't 'take it out on' him (not doing whats best for him if you catch my drift)

He sounds like a bit of a plonker if he can't understand if lieing to you is what has annoyed you. as for the threats of smashing your nose and smashing the computer over your head, i would have kicked my OH out never to return if he threatened me like that!! No-one deserves to be spoken to like that!

Let him sleep on it and see how it goes tomorrow. Sorry i have no more words of wisdom.

 

[fran_23]

Well Ive just confronted him and he went absolubtly mental he was calling me all nasty names and told me he was going to smash my nose and the computer over my head He doesnt think he has done anything wrong.
I also found that he was slagging me off to some other girl aswell.
He said he doesnt want to be with me anymore because I'm nosey and has gone home and told me he won't look after Finley tomorow whilst I'm at work.

Its not Finleys fault!! i hope regardless of what happens in the long run he doesn't 'take it out on' him (not doing whats best for him if you catch my drift)

He sounds like a bit of a plonker if he can't understand if lieing to you is what has annoyed you. as for the threats of smashing your nose and smashing the computer over your head, i would have kicked my OH out never to return if he threatened me like that!! No-one deserves to be spoken to like that!

Let him sleep on it and see how it goes tomorrow. Sorry i have no more words of wisdom.

Oh yeah sorry Sams reply just reminded me of something i left out of my post!
He was totally out of order threatening to hit you..esp with the computer. Theres no excuse for that!

 

[xnicolaxcx]

I know talking to ur ex is something everybody does if you bump into them. But if he didnt do anything wrong then why did he say he didn't speak to her. And why most of all swear on our little boys life. If id spoken to my ex i would say straight away.
He didnt reply out of politeness because he sent the first message to her.

This isnt the first time he has lied to me these past few months he has told me alot of lies and Im really struggeling to trust him at the moment. I think tonight he has shown his true colours.
I would never usually check up on him as i don't belive in looking at ur OH's phone/computer etc. but with everything thats happened these last few months i just had to look for my own sanity.

 

[fran_23]

Ok fair enough hun are you ok? maybe hes looking for a bit of escapism..new baby and all that! a lot of men do it.in the 1st year.they think all the attention is for the baby and feel left out (how childish) you know your relationship best and if you know hes been lying to you and you have a git feeling somethings up..let him calm down after tonight and then ask him straight up whats wrong with him..and tell him that his lying and shiifty behaviour is what made you check up on him.

 

[xnicolaxcx]

Thanks for your replys girls. Fran i just read my last post I didnt mean it to sound a bit snappy (sorry) I will try and speak to him tomorrow, let him sleep on it =)

 

[fran_23]

Thanks for your replys girls. Fran i just read my last post I didnt mean it to sound a bit snappy (sorry) I will try and speak to him tomorrow, let him sleep on it =)

Oh no not at all hun.. I hope you are ok! let us know how it goes!

 

[mum2A&L]

Have you spoken to him today?