Upset by friend

[rachaellouise]

I am not sure if I am over reacting due to hormones or not so opinions would be greatful!

A friend of mine, she is married and like me suffers from mental heath problems but she also has a mild heart condition so it would be slightly more risky than normal for her to have a baby.
Her husband does not really want kids and she has said that she does not feel ready to have them yet but maybe one day.
I done think she is even happy that I am having a baby, she takes no intrest what so ever and thinking back she has actually been quite negative in the things she has said to me such as...

When I told her Dan and I were going to start trying for a baby, she said
'Oh really? Will Dan even like the look of you when you are pregnant?'

I told Dan this and he was offened to say the least, she gave the impression that she thinks Dan is only with me becasue of the way I look.

When I told her I might be pregnant but was waiting to take the test, I said what is your gut instinct saying, do you think I am pregnant?'

She said 'I dont feel anything'

Now when ever I mention the baby or anything pregnancy related she seems to be so responsive, Dan thinks it is jealously?

She does not even bother to really ask how I am either

 

[xshauna_bazx]

Shes probably jealous hun, I have a friend similar! Maybe say to her...are you ever gonna be happy for me?
I don't think its your hormones as i know how you feel and what you mean...and what a terrible thing to say "will dan even like the look of you when you are pregnant". She sounds jealous so leave her be if she wants to be like that.xx

 

[rachaellouise]

Thankyou hun! I know it was a horrible thing to say and I was quite taken back by it too!

 

[flexilexi394]

completely sounds like jealousy to me. maybe shes struggling with the idea that she may have issues if she had children? x

 

[pinkymum]

Yeah it sounds similar to a situation I had. As Lexi said maybe deep down she's struggling with wanting children? I suggest back off for a while, it isnt nice having someone negative around.
*hugs*


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[Constantstar]

My friends don't seem that interested to be honest. I'm the first out of us to be preg and they just don't seem to care. Oh well. Its about me and the baby I'm worried about! X

 

[Lou_1]

completely sounds like jealousy to me. maybe shes struggling with the idea that she may have issues if she had children? x

Agree with this and the other girls. Id prob feel sorry for her being like that. Prob better off without her hun x

 

[ippa]

My friends don't seem that interested to be honest. I'm the first out of us to be preg and they just don't seem to care. Oh well. Its about me and the baby I'm worried about! X

My friends are like this aswell! They don't invite me out or to anything anymore, but oh well I'm always in bed early now anyway!

But Rachael I would certainly say something to her if it upsetting you!
XxX

 

[Kezzamunster]

I wouldn't consider her as a friend at all, shes certainly is just jealous & your be better off without her

You don't need added stress from people like this, it's about you, your lil bubba & OH, as long as the 3 of you are happy & healthy, that's all that matters

xxx

 

[Lou_1]

Funny i dont get invited out as much now either its kind of rude i think haha

 

[Maybe_mummy]

Hi,

Sounds like shes being a bit of a cow to be honest, coming from a girl who never really wanted kids (me) when one of my close friends found out she was preganant I didnt show as much interest as I should have done cos simply wasent my thing and I suppose I didnt want things to change between us (totally selfish I get that now!), I regret that now and have tried to be more involved in her following 3. Sounds likes shes not all that interested hence the comments not only cos maybe your having a baby and shes not or maybe cos your attention will be away from her and more onto the baby.

You have 3 options either, ask her about it and how shes feeling (she might not realise shes being cow) or either dont share about the baby until she asks, or loose her as a friend.

Good Luck.

 

[rachaellouise]

Thankyou all for your advise!
I am ment to be seeing her on Wednesday so I will see how she acts that day and go from there!

 

[heidi-hi]

God it gets to me how unthoughtful and jealous people can be. Most of my friends have been good but 1 hasnt. I had told her i thought i might pregnant and she asked me to ring her and let her know. I rang and rang her for 4 days, and nothing, no call back, left her a voicemail an asked her to call me... nothing. So in the end i sent her a txt, explained i didnt wanna do it like this but i was pregnant... nothing. 3 days later i got a msg saying she couldnt believe i told her by a txt and we need to meet up!!! I was gobsmacke. Met up with her and she said she had been really busy but hadnt got the msg until the day she replied. I let it go but later she slipped up and admitted she didnt know what to say back in a reply to me and secretly felt jealous, but she understood why i sent a txt after... WHAT!?

That was the last time i saw her, other than the odd txt! Hopefully on Wed your friend changes her tune and starts to be pleased for u. If not then shes not a true friend xxxx

 

[purplehippy]

She could be a little jealous, or she might be a little resentful because her friendship with you will change now that you will be a mummy.

My gut instinct tells me this could be to do with her mental problems - her responses sound like a friend I had, who was unable to say anything they should, only things that were hurtful or cold.

Don't necessarily read too much into it but I would suggest backing off and sticking to those around you who make you feel comfortable. It's not mean, because people need to see that their words and actions can push people away - or they'll never change. Some never do, regardless, but either way, you don't need that sort of thing.