To answer all the questions from the chat room tonight that I couldn't type quick enough to answer... 
When I met my DH 9 years ago I knew he'd had a vasectomy about 16 years previously - so the chances of a reversal were basically zero. I had to make a choice between being with him and no more LOs or losing the love of my life in the hope that one day I'd meet someone else and have children...was an easy choice at the time.
As time went on it got more difficult to accept no more babies ever. But I tried not to talk about it. Earlier this year we were lying in bed in the early hours of the morning talking about nothing v much when suddenly he said lets have another baby..
I asked how we were going to do this exactly and he said - by donor.
I was so excited (after I stopped crying
) that I made him get up and we went on the internet to see what we could find out. I didn't want clinics and all that - wanted something less formal but didn't know if it was possible. Straight away I found a site which basically puts couples in touch with potential donors. We signed up there and then.
If you use a clinic now - the law says that the donor's details must be passed onto the child when they are older enough. a lot of donors want to stay anonymous and so the number of donors in clinics has dropped dramatically. On the website we use - you contact a potential donor, get to know them and then decide whether to go ahead. All medical screening, sperm tests etc are done privately.
We had a couple of messing around donors, who didn't turn up at all or days late - and a few weirdos
Finally we posted on the messageboard on the site about how disappointed we were and our current donor got in touch. he's v relaible, v down to earth, has 2 children and several donor children. He wanted to stay anonymous (we only know his frst name and mobile no) and wanted no contact with the child, other than a photo at birth and occasional photos afterwards.
When I'm ovulating, we travel to be near our donor and book a hotel room. He goes in and makes his donation (ahem
) into a cup, then leaves. My Dh and I then go in and use a plastic syringe to insert the donation - then I do everything all of you do - legs in the air, orgasm etc etc.
Everyone who knows we're TTC knows how we're doing it - there will be no secrets. Even Josh knows and understands. I didn't know my biological father till I was 18 and was raised instead by my adopted dad so i have some understanding of the issues that will arise. We have a medical family history of our donor so that the child has that info. My DH was the one who insisted everyone knew the truth - it makes no difference to him as he's raised Josh as his own.
legally our donor has the same rights to his child as any other father - which is why we chose someone who already has donation children and has no contact with them, becuase we know he understands what will happen. He doesn't get paid and does it just to help - like a woman donating eggs.
Okay..any questions And I don't mind any at all
When I met my DH 9 years ago I knew he'd had a vasectomy about 16 years previously - so the chances of a reversal were basically zero. I had to make a choice between being with him and no more LOs or losing the love of my life in the hope that one day I'd meet someone else and have children...was an easy choice at the time.
As time went on it got more difficult to accept no more babies ever. But I tried not to talk about it. Earlier this year we were lying in bed in the early hours of the morning talking about nothing v much when suddenly he said lets have another baby..
I asked how we were going to do this exactly and he said - by donor. I was so excited (after I stopped crying
) that I made him get up and we went on the internet to see what we could find out. I didn't want clinics and all that - wanted something less formal but didn't know if it was possible. Straight away I found a site which basically puts couples in touch with potential donors. We signed up there and then.If you use a clinic now - the law says that the donor's details must be passed onto the child when they are older enough. a lot of donors want to stay anonymous and so the number of donors in clinics has dropped dramatically. On the website we use - you contact a potential donor, get to know them and then decide whether to go ahead. All medical screening, sperm tests etc are done privately.
We had a couple of messing around donors, who didn't turn up at all or days late - and a few weirdos
Finally we posted on the messageboard on the site about how disappointed we were and our current donor got in touch. he's v relaible, v down to earth, has 2 children and several donor children. He wanted to stay anonymous (we only know his frst name and mobile no) and wanted no contact with the child, other than a photo at birth and occasional photos afterwards. When I'm ovulating, we travel to be near our donor and book a hotel room. He goes in and makes his donation (ahem
) into a cup, then leaves. My Dh and I then go in and use a plastic syringe to insert the donation - then I do everything all of you do - legs in the air, orgasm etc etc.Everyone who knows we're TTC knows how we're doing it - there will be no secrets. Even Josh knows and understands. I didn't know my biological father till I was 18 and was raised instead by my adopted dad so i have some understanding of the issues that will arise. We have a medical family history of our donor so that the child has that info. My DH was the one who insisted everyone knew the truth - it makes no difference to him as he's raised Josh as his own.
legally our donor has the same rights to his child as any other father - which is why we chose someone who already has donation children and has no contact with them, becuase we know he understands what will happen. He doesn't get paid and does it just to help - like a woman donating eggs.
Okay..any questions
And I don't mind any at all 
That's fascinating!
)
