The Inlaws and smoking

[xshauna_bazx]

When OH mam has her other son's kids she has all the windows shut in the car and smokes! As well as OH sister too. They come in stinking of fags, i can smell it more now as i packed in 10 month ago. I know she will smoke infront of my baby!!! We will tell her, but every time i mension it to OH he thinks i am getting at her and goes in a mood. I feel like she will do it secretly. There was other people that smoked in front of me when i was a baby and i ended up having to go in an oxygen tent. If she EVER smokes near my child she won't be looking after him or her! I feel like she will smoke in front of it no matter what i say. I mean they smoke in the house...she would never go outside to smoke for a baby i don't think. Well she smokes in front of the other kids so she will mine! I mean it the first time i smell smoke on the baby thats her lot! Am i being harsh?

 

[Princess81]

Not at all. I am a classic on/off smoker but when I found out that i was pregnant I quit straight away. My o/h's parents both smoke too, and for the brief time I saw them whilst I was pregnant they stopped smoking in their house and went outside, they certainly wouldn't smoke in front of a child and I think that if you don't like it, that they should respect your wishes.
My o/h is totally against smoking and told his parents that the child would not have gone round to their house whilst they were still smokers! lol. I can totally see your concerns, I would feel the same way too xx

 

[xshauna_bazx]

Lol...argh i KNOW she will. I can't mention it to OH without him thinking i am moaning about her, he said he will say something when the time comes though, but i still don't trust her not to xx

 

[KellyHook]

my MIL is a smoker and she would always go outside to smoke or not smoke will my daughter was around!! it was a bit hard when going to her house, as she would smoke in the house when we wernt there so was like stepped into a smoke machine when we turned up.. but she has said to me that she is going to stop smoking soon, hopefully before baby is born!

 

[Princess81]

If you don't trust her, then don't let her look after the l/o when it arrives. It's not fair that you will spend the time worrying that she will smoke around the baby. You do need to be firm on this if it's important to you. After all, you are mummy so what you say goes! x

 

[KellyHook]

If she cant stop smoking around baby, then only let her see baby at your house, then its your rules..

 

[xshauna_bazx]

Thanks girls, yeah she SHOULD listen to what i want. If she doesn't i'll try my best not to let my baby go round so she has to decide what is more important.xx

 

[Princess81]

I'm just lucky that my o/h is so anti smoking! He tells it as it is to his parents, when I get pregnant again I know they'll be ordered out of their own house to smoke again lol. I don't have to say anything, it just happens. I think your o/h should be a wee bit more supportive of your wishes shauna and not go in a mood. After all its his baby too and he should be equally concerned for its health x

 

[Kay1987]

I havnt had this problem as my parents and oh parents dont smoke but my friends MIL smoked and she told her that all the she smoked in the house she wouldnt be bringing the baby round and she definately wouldnt be having the baby overnight or anythin. she said this to her from the day she told them she was pregnant and even stopped visiting pregnant coz she didnt want the baby 2 get second hand smoke. her MIL got so fed up with never seeing them she built a smoking shelter out the back! its your baby and she has to look after it the way u want her 2 other wise its nothin and thats not being 2 harsh, its your babys health! i would tell her straight, OH should support u fully when it concerns your little one. x

 

[xshauna_bazx]

Yeah he should get a backbone with her. Even if i mention her he think i am having a go at her lol! Also the house is like something off how clean is your house which is also another worry when baby is crawling! xx

 

[Princess81]

Oh god shauna it doesn't sound like a very healthy envirmonment anyway, I'd start thinking of excuses now to avoid going round lol.

Kay, we have a "smoking shelter" built out back for o/h's parents when they are round lol x

 

[xshauna_bazx]

Yeah kay i know what you mean...great about the smoking shelter though lol! He is supportive but feels he has alot of time to tell her...but i'd rather tell her now and keep telling her so she gets it in her head. xx
Princess, exactly i know...i wasn't exaggerating when i said about how clean is your house either seriously! Oh god what am i going to do lol xx

 

[xshauna_bazx]

Oh she lives 30 miles away too but comes to ours once a week so maybe i want the baby so far away anyways...yay i have an excuse lol! xx

 

[Kay1987]

lol get em chucked out the back. My OH's auntie actually just lit up a fag in his cousins house when my son was 6months old. Now his cousin doesnt smoke in the house, only has the odd one when shes drinking, but she was 2 polite 2 ask her 2 take it outside so i just told her straight "can you take that outside coz i dont ant ethan around the smoke". she was way annoyed with me and probably thought "fuck off its not your house" but i wasnt bothered. just because she wants 2 knock a few years off her life doesnt mean we all have 2! Who would just assume they could smoke in some1 elses house, propa cheeky! x

 

[xshauna_bazx]

Oh god kay lol, good on you for standing up and saying something! xx

 

[Princess81]

I would totally say it too, either that or, "I'm sorry, but we need to leave now because it's not healthy for my young baby to be round smoke" It's fair enough, it's your baby and your choice, if they don't like it then they can lump it eh!

 

[tinytoes]

Nope my mum and da smoke and since aoibheann was born then smoke in the garage at home ,they dont smoke around here when we visit and always wash thier hands . we had a tough battle with them at first , many a dissagrement , but I have never smoker , my OH doesnt and I see no reason why my daugter should be forced to .

 

[pinkymum]

I think you have every right to ask her not to smoke in front of your baby. I wouldn't allow her to smoke in my house. I've been on and off smoking since I got pregnant and I've caved a few times. It's awful! I have felt so guilty and would.beverages smoke inside but yeah i'll admit since I stopped I've had the odd fag. no one I know let's people smoke in front of their kids hun. Just be strict about it!

 

[tinytoes]

Well done to any of you who has given up or cut down smoking , as a non smoker I know I don't understand how difficult it is but I see my parents struggle .

 

[pinkymum]

Well done to any of you who has given up or cut down smoking , as a non smoker I know I don't understand how difficult it is but I see my parents struggle .

Thanks hun, I didn't realise just how hard it would be. I was a very heavy smoker before I fell pregnant but I thought once I fell pregnant it would be really easy......how wrong was I lol. Still struggle with it everyday. I came of meds I had been on for 7/8 years, meds I didn't actually need anymore and just needed a reason to come off them. So that was my main goal and that was nothing compared to quitting the fags. And these were highly addictive meds, it was actually easier than I thought it would be. It's lovely to not be taking tablets everyday! And I did it properly with my doc. If I haven't fully stopped after baby has arrived my doc said I could try those tablets once I've given birth. I'm actually at a loss what to do re smoking. X x x x