Someone please help

[lisey]

Hi ladies,

I am having such a tough time with all of this. My boss has been very supportive and has had words with the woman in question. She hasn't had any disciplinary action taken though which I think is ridiculous.
The thing is, myself and the woman (I will call her jane) are not speaking at the moment, my boss said she should apologise to me, she hasnt, she has blocked me on fb-couldnt care less about that but she and another woman at work (sarah) seem to be getting a bit nasty and sly. Sarah used to be a good friend of mine but I found out she was being quite nasty behind my back. So I kept quiet and just got on with work, being friendly and pleasant for the sake of atmosphere at work. Sarah seems to be avoiding conversation with me-even though she said she thought Jane was out of order at the time. I have also found out that she thinks I should apologise to jane-for what I dont know!! They seem to be purposly trying to make me feel uncomfortable, they know I have been a bit low lately and its like they are using that to their advantage. They have arranged a works do for saturday and not told me about it but put it on sarahs facebook so that I would see it obviously and keep making snide comments/jokes etc. They also tried to make out like I was aggressive and overly confrontational during our discussion, I am not like that at all-luckily my boss knew the truth as she knows I am not that kind of person.
I feel like I am in a school playground and I just feel like I need to get out of that place. We are all in one room, there is no escape from it. I feel like I am being bullied out of there in a way. They are quite nasty people and I have known this for quite a while, I have heard the way they speak about people they dont like, so I know they will be doing the same about me. Grrr, its driving me mad. I have just been put back on anti-depressants for my mood and for bad anxiety and they are making me feel worse. I dont know how to handle this situation?

Sorry for the long moan, I just can't believe I am the one being treated like this when I stood up for children/people with disabilities, I was not in the wrong and yet I am getting the rough ride x

 

[Titch85]

It's a real tough situation, glad your boss has realised it was wrong though. I don't really know what to suggest, apart from just keep your head down and do the job you know you're good at, but keep an eye out for any jobs you might like to apply for.

 

[tweetyfoo]

Awww sweetie so sorry you are having a tough time

I think your boss needs to step in and sort it out. I've had situations like this in work before and the best thing to do is to "have it out" so to speak.

Everyone needs to sit in a room with tea and cake and sort it out I think.

Failing that I think you need to keep your head down for now and hope that it blows over.

Remember that we are always here if you need to vent or need some support x

 

[lisey]

Thanks ladies, nice to be able to vent and get it all out x

 

[HopesDreams]

I'm late to this post (as usual) but I'm glad that you spoke to somebody higher in the chain about your co-worker's atittude. As for her being a wee sh!te behind your back - get your head down, get on with your work, focus on the kids & forget about her. I read a quote once "What you think about me is none of my business". Its always stuck in my mind. Don't give her the satisfaction or the headspace. I know that's easier said than done sometimes, especially if its in your nature to worry or stress about what other people think of you but just remember, she's the one in the wrong, not you. You did nothing wrong! *hugs*
I have worked in nurseries for years & years. I'm hoping to get into childminding rather than returning to work at the end of my maternity leave, for no other reason than it will save me a fortune on childcare & its something I've wanted to do for years. Like Titch85 I take great pride in my work, always have. When I first got into childcare I knew that a lot of people viewed it as a glorified babysitter so I studied every aspect I could possibly study so that I could be the best I could possibly be, for myself & for the kids I worked with. Just plug away hun, you're doing right by the kids, good luck!

 

[lisey]

I'm late to this post (as usual) but I'm glad that you spoke to somebody higher in the chain about your co-worker's atittude. As for her being a wee sh!te behind your back - get your head down, get on with your work, focus on the kids & forget about her. I read a quote once "What you think about me is none of my business". Its always stuck in my mind. Don't give her the satisfaction or the headspace. I know that's easier said than done sometimes, especially if its in your nature to worry or stress about what other people think of you but just remember, she's the one in the wrong, not you. You did nothing wrong! *hugs*
I have worked in nurseries for years & years. I'm hoping to get into childminding rather than returning to work at the end of my maternity leave, for no other reason than it will save me a fortune on childcare & its something I've wanted to do for years. Like Titch85 I take great pride in my work, always have. When I first got into childcare I knew that a lot of people viewed it as a glorified babysitter so I studied every aspect I could possibly study so that I could be the best I could possibly be, for myself & for the kids I worked with. Just plug away hun, you're doing right by the kids, good luck!

Thanks hun,

It has been another rough day (my assistant manager who is good friends with her isnt talking to me either now!) but I just got on with it, did my work and had fun singing and dancing with the children
I hope all goes well with childminding, thats what I am planning on doing in the long run too x

 

[Hunnie]

I go to a school catering for children with additional needs with one of my patients and the first time I went I was disgusted with how the staff spoke to some of the children, particularly the autistic ones. I didn't agree with how they shouted at the children and got so aggressive when there needn't have been especially as often these children were too in their own little worlds to realise what they have supposedly done. It was an absolute joke tbh.

 

[lisey]

Its disgraceful isnt it. I would never treat anyone like that x

 

[BabysMomma]

I think you're awesome for speaking out and unveiling the nastiness of your co-worker and I'm so sorry that because you've done something right that you're being made to feel like you've doing something wrong!

It is beyond me that these types of people choose to work in caring professions when their attitudes stink so much. How awful it must be for you at work with these woman being silly and childish. Just remember though that they're being like this because you did the right thing and you were that child's voice and rightfully sticking up for him.

As the ladies have suggested, if you can, continue what you're doing getting on with your job and be so very proud of yourself for what you have done. Do not let these woman push you out of a job that you love. Let them be walking on eggshells afraid to disrespect the children while in your presence x

 

[lisey]

Thanks so much hun, I am feeling a lot better and stronger this past week. I am not going to let them push me out or try to intimidate me. I know I did the right thing and will stand by it no matter what they do or say x