Some of you lovely ladies might be able to help.

[LuW]

Okay is a long story where I will seriously bash my OH (do quite a bit on this matter but at the end of the day he is actually doing what he can) and some seriously bashing against the silly little 'girl' it involves. And before I get a 'Ohh you need to be careful she may see this' Not bothered. She's making his and his parents lives hell and I'd say it to her face is she was grown up enough to actually meet with either of us when we're anywhere near their home town. SO yano =D Bolshy 'Kiddie' (her little nickname for me =D Along with 'it' 'her' 'bitch' and 'toddler') time =D


The story goes to when me and OH got back together after our split because I didn't think he was grown up enough to be a dad, and he went and proved it over new years by getting very very drunk and sleeping with her. Was completely honest with me from when we got back together on the 6th of jan. (I realised I hate being without him) on the 9th he got a text saying he was going ot be a dad. Was a break freaked and tried calling the number but the phone was off. Eventually found out what was going on by a friend of OH's telling his mum he needed to call this girl (know each other through friends of friends or something.) When he did she told him she was pregnant. He wasn't thrilled and made a comment of does she really want someone she doesn't know around her baby. (a comment she bring up in every argument they have as she rewords it to him saying get an abortion).
When she bumped into his brother in the supermarket she got arsey saying OH was abandoning his baby (nearlyBIL mistook this for meaning our baby and told her that he was back with me and we we're working this through) She went mad at OH after this saying he obvs didn't care and she didn't ever want him around her baby. And the phone got turned off for a few weeks.

With things going how they did at the end of jan we 'forgot' to keep sending a daily text just incase. Which riled her up again. So cue massive long list of names she decided to call my baby. We then we're past photos of her in a bar in their hometown (which always has the date and time on the wall in some 'cool new age' decoration thing) doing shots of something on that date where she was at least 6weeks gone. A glass of wine Can be coped with, shots though! When OH asked her over this she replied with 'I don't want this stupid brat anyway' which broke my heart and definately affected OH in a way I wasn't expecting.

We've had plenty of other arguments over the past few months and now she's due in Oct (late oct ... when she slept with OH on new years...) which has made OH mum demand a DNA that she will be doing as she's said she doesn't trust this 'girl' as far as she can throw her and nearlyMIL is usually very laid back and just leaves people to it.

Her favourite thing to do at the moment though is to make comments on facebook about how 'HE' hasn't been to a single scan and wont give her money for his baby. And for anyone who doesn't know my OH is in the forces and is currently in Germany but will actually be deployed when the baby is due. She knew this when she slept with him. So I don't get how she's expecting him to get home with only 24hours notice (she wont ever tell him with more notice because last time she did nearyMIL turned up instead =D Apparently her face was a picture!)
And as for not giving her money, she's really well known in that area for not having pleasant pasttimes so we've been sending her things, clothes, bedsets, nappies, bottles, wipes things like that always adding to the value she said she needed a week instead. Mainly so she hasn't extra money to feed her habbits, which may or may not be still going on I can't comment on that only that she has done them in the past and still is very 'in' those circles and so we know that little man will have plenty of clothes and clean nappies and bottles when he needs them.

She's made a few passing comments on FB over taking him to court, which OH will always take in stride and pretty much go with and tell her to bring it, He's prepared to fight for this little boy. Is this our only way of him getting access and will he only be entitled to 'what she says goes'? or is there a decent chance of him applying for full custardy as we(OH, me, nearlyMIL&FIL and nearlySIL) have serious concerns?



Thanks ladies! Really struggling with whats best to do as I'm worried she'll refuse to let OH see him and then He'll turn up on our door accussing OH of never caring which is definately not the case, whether he'll admit it to me or not, he really loves that little boy or he'd have given up a long time ago.


LuX

 

[ippa]

Hey,
wow thats some predicament! Well it sounds slightly suspicious to me that she is due at end of October when it was new years eve!
Definately get a DNA test as soon as possible just to make sure.
Im not sure what else to say to be honest, but didnt want to read and run!
Good luck with everything hun
XxX

 

[LuW]

Thanks hun!
That was mine and nearlyMIL's first thoughts when OH told us. Just like looked at each other, Oh and his dad completely unaware having a 'guy-moment!'.

So mad at how childishly she's behaving though. End of the day she's thirty something, is pregnant and looks after other peoples children day in day out yet behaves this over her own child. What I'd give to really tell her exactly how I feel and know she isn't being a keyboard warrior.

Don't want a in-person arugment..... don't say in online. Silly, silly girl.



Thanks again though hun!

LuX

 

[Lacey's Mummy]

I don't think this baby is your OH. My youngest was due end of October (28th) and he was conceived beginning of feb, last period 20th jan. Hope that helps.
Don't let the silly little girl get to you hun

 

[Esoames]

Isla is a late October baby, conceived 6th feb! So how a baby made in January is due end of October I'll never know!

 

[LuW]

That's exactly what me and his mum thought when she said. It was a rolls the eyes at each other kind of moment. Not heard anything from her in awhile. Not since me and OH's friend pointed out she has all the receipts to everything OH sent to her before me and his mum raised concerns, and therefore she knows he's sent what she asked for. She's been scarily quiet since then tbh.


I'll keep you posted girlies!! Thanks for keeping me sane!!


LuX

 

[Froslass]

I am due October 3rd, and I KNOW for a fact my baby was conceived around about the 12th of January (this is the only time OH and I did it lol)

If her due date is deffo the end of October (a whole month after me) it's highly unlikely she got pregnant before me, if you know what I mean. If she slept with him on the 1st, regardless of how long her cycles are, she would have been 4weeks pregnant by the 14th of January. Meaning if the baby was your OH's her due date would have to be somewhere like 24th septemebr....not end of October...

To have a due date for the end of October, (say for example the 28th) she would have to have slept with someone round about the 4th of february!! Xx

If you're certain she's due end of October, and your oh slept with her new years eve, i would be 99% confident in saying the baby isn't his...xx

 

[LuW]

Definately 1st Jan and he went back to germany until 20th Feb on the 5th of Jan lol!

Cant wait to see where this all goes tbh, he's back home this week but shes refusing to even speak to him even though she left him a message while he was flying over saying she wanted to meet up =S I've stayed home here in the north because things are finally getting a little bit more sane up here and I'm on the count down to what should have been my due date so in no mood for her crap without actively trying to offend her in every way I can. Not just my usual outwitting her into admiting things she's been denying. Whether baby's OH's or not, she really seems convinced and this could get interesting as to if she'll agree to a DNA as she can drag that out until atleast march as OH wont be in the uk to get court action if se does refuse.

Would say it's making me sleepy but I think that might just be because I'm posting at half 1 in the morning like a fool =[


LuX

 

[Emmamb]

He slept with her on the 1st and she was pregnant on the 9th?! That's suspicious in it's self.

My advice would be to stop buying her things for the baby,even if it is his baby he doesn't have to support it till he/she is born. Tell her that once you've had a positive DNA then you will discuss money or even offer a small sum backdated to now iykwim?
I'm 99% sure this baby is not your oh's so let her continue playing her childish games and get on with your lives. Xxxx

 

[Emmamb]

Oh and if she won't give a DNA test then tell her to take her claim through csa,they'll enforce a test if you ask for one xx

 

[LuW]

Thanks Emma, Just want this whole nightmare to be over with.Just makes me so angry that she gets to parade about acting like the world owes her something when I should have been a few days away from holding my little man.

I've actually not gone to see his parents with him because of her. Hate how she controls our lives,would have thought someone whose just turned 31 would have more maturity then she does=[