So confused :(

[pringle88]

I really dunno what to do! To cut a long story short my ex was a complete tool we ended up splitting up when I was pregnant... Anyway a month or so ago he started coming round helping me with Ella and stupidly I've let him move in with me... He's in the spare room! The condition was to help me with Ella, his housemate was moving his gf in an he had nowhere else to go!

Since being here I've realised how much I dislike him! He makes me angry to just look at him. He used to make comments when I was pregnant about him not being the dad, I trapped him, he wants DNA etc all in a jokey way but loads of times!

He comes in from work and then goes to his room on his bloody Xbox! He's never bathed Ella or put her to bed I can't remember the last time he fed her and he's never got her dressed! Sometimes she cries when he holds her until he puts her down because she doesnt know him, He is a rubbish dad! He does nothing to help me!!!

I can feel myself becoming more and more depressed, I came home to a dirty house today and no clean bottles and he's sat on the settee with his can of Stella watching the footy!!!

I kinda need him here financially as my mum was helping out before and I can't rely on her forever but he keeps dropping comments about us getting back together - he couldn't be further away from what I'm thinking!

I'm such a fool letting him move in but now I'm stuck

How can I sort this mess???

 

[pinkyprincess]

I'd sit him down and give him a month to buck up or he's out tbh!

 

[Pickledonions]

Same here its just not good enough

Sent from my HTC Wildfire S A510e using Tapatalk

 

[pringle88]

Ive told him loads that he is only there to help with Ella he says "she sleeps through the night, I work and you do nothing!!" therefore I suppose I should do everything! (I'm on maternity leave so it's not like I'm scrounging off him!!)

 

[pinkyprincess]

I Di fund men a bit dismissive of the work that's involved with full time care of a baby!

 

[pringle88]

50 years ago fair enough but get with the times!! does my bloody head in! think ill be sending him on his way again soon, the benefits people are gonna get well annoyed with me keep messing them around!!

 

[Loula]

defo sit him dwn and if hes not willing to buck up chuck him out... xx

 

[Jaxx01]

Don't worry about the benefits people hun, they barely bat an eyelid!! Circumstances change all the time! Ella (she's absolutely beautiful btw) needs a happy mummy xx

 

[pringle88]

Yeah I guess your right, let's see if I can get him off his Xbox long enough to have a conversation with him!! Thank you xx

 

[Jayceesmumma]

Just seen this.. Is everything okay now? I'm sure there's an update somewhere on here but I'm on my phone and it's hard to look everywhere lol!!

 

[pringle88]

Nothing has really changed hun, he's still here - chooses to spend most nights in the spare room, he's had virgin installed in the conservatory where his Xbox is so he can shut himself off... Me and Ella don't really get a look in! X

 

[VikkiR]

I'd give him 2 weeks notice to leave, some things just aren't worth the misery. He's taking the wot sits and using his child to do so! x

 

[Jaxx01]

I think I'd have to give him his matching orders hun I know it sounds harsh and you prob want to make it all work for Ella's sake but if he's cutting himself off anyway you'll be much happier with him gone! Ella will prob get more of his time as he'll have to make an effort to see her cxxx

 

[Jayceesmumma]

I agree with jaxx if he's not there he will spend more one on one time with her when he's there.. It's like having a lodger not a father.. She will come to realise her dad doesn't want to play with her he would rather sit in another room and it's not nice
Its gotta be hard for you babe and it's easy for us to say this and that..

 

[pringle88]

I think the same I just can't be arsed with the hassle at the mo, which is bad I know I should sort it out but it's just easier to let it carry on isn't it! He does have some times where he talks to me and plays with Ella but its not often - he doesn't have a clue what to do with Ella! X

 

[Jayceesmumma]

It's very easy to just let it happen.. I know all about that
I hope he bucks his ideas up or f***s off somewhere else so u don't have to deal with him and he can be just a dad to Ella xx

 

[Jayceesmumma]

It's so sad he doesn't know how to look after his own daughter.. My OH is the same and yet expects me to be ok with him taking her out??!! What if she has a poo?? He can't change her!!

 

[Sassysugar]

Sorry to hear he doesn't help with Ella. Just sending you a hug hun it's rubbish that he's not pulling his weight, what does he think you do all day? Looking after a baby is hard work and trying to keep on top of the housework as well is tiring. He really should help you more hun x